Is this just a me thing?

[Sailormoon95]

The thing is, I'm fairly new to relationships and dating and true love. I'm the past, I've been focused on school. But now that I'm done with school and start focusing more on my dating life (since I'm close to my 30s), I've realized that I'm unable to sustain a healthy long lasting relationship with my partner. Also, this is mainly rooted to my parents ongoing bluff of a divorce in my younger years.

[SnowedIn]

If it is every partner and they are all somewhat different and it's every relationship, then yes, it probably is you. And I don't say that in mean or hurtful way, just an objective answer to your question. The analogy is that if a cook burns every meal then it isn't the fault of the recipe or ingredients. The common denominator is the cook.

Anyway, think about how you talk with people. Or don't talk. Think about what in your parents' divorce you might be reacting to. Or scared of. And then work through that with your therapist. Also helpful might be to look back at the relationships you have had. Try to figure out when and how they went off the rails and if there's a common theme there.

[Purpleronnie]

Not really sure what your asking specifically as I don’t know what isn’t working on the relationship side although you seem fairly convinced it’s maybe your fault. I’d say relationships are also about learning so don’t be hard on yourself or put pressure on yourself to fix faults you don’t have. Be yourself always but learn to be the best version of you for that special Someone and I’m sure your relationship will blossom

[Sailormoon95]

The thing is I'm like this in my everyday to day relationships.

[Purpleronnie]

Well , I don’t think you are the problem. Guys gotta learn to be in relationships too , so maybe it’s them?

[ZenJen444]

It's you, get therapy

[Sailormoon95]

I've been getting therapy and talking about relationships. I just haven't been able to maintain a long lasting relationship.

[ZenJen444]

Then you might want to re- evaluate yourself and what you're putting out there. You attract what you are

[Sailormoon95]

Thank you for your advice.

[ZenJen444]

You're welcome

[Anonymous]

You just need good sex