Best friend lied about his age?

[Anonymous]

so basically I've had an online best friend for over a year now and we are really close and share everything with each other, we started developing feelings for each other like 3 months ago but never got into an official relationship. we always talk about the future and how we will get married and stuff but a week ago i got to know he’s actually 3 years younger than me (i’m 21) and he lied to me. i asked him why he did that but the reason he gave didn’t really make sense. i really love this dude but my parents will never let me marry someone who’s younger than me and i’m really having a hard time trusting him now but he's acting pretty nonchalant about it. i’m very scared of losing him. (we’ve met twice irl)
what would you do if you were in my place?

[PrettyPriya]

Honestly, I would move on. I certainly would not be thinking of marrying him. He will have lost my trust completely. I would be thinking to myself about what else he has hidden from me or what he will in the future. That is a bad way to start a marriage.

I have three things that I believe are the top three for a successful relationship, be it boyfriend and girlfriend or husband and wife. Trust, respect and communication. He has damaged the first two already.

He has broken trust, obviously. He has also damaged respect. If he had respect for you, he would have not lied. Again, I would be constantly worrying about what else he hasn't told me or if he will do that to me in the future.

That together with your parents never allowing it, you have your answer as to what you should do. Even if your parents did come around, it doesn't dismiss the fact he lied and betrayed your trust. I know, not what you want to hear but probably should.

[Asker]

yes you’re right but do you think i could look past this mistake? because he’s actually really nice and he cares for me deeply. he lied about his age because of something that happened in the past and he never brought it up because it wasn't a big deal for him and he thought itll be the same for me so im confused here about what to do. our friendship is actually very special, the bestest I've ever had

[PrettyPriya]

That is solely up to you as to whether you can look past it. Really, only time will tell if suspicions starts sneaking back in about whether he is truthful or not. I cannot say how you will feel in the future, sadly.

[boobliker]

how can you get feelings in an online date? I find it very hard to understand that!

[Asker]

actually i developed feelings for him after i met him in real life he’s really nice and we live a little close to each other

[boobliker]

ok so you have meet good

[In_Trance]

You lost me at "online best friend"


This is a fairly tale

[Asker]

🙁 but we’ve met twice in real life and he has talked to my mum too for like 2m irl

[In_Trance]

He lives an entire life offline that you're not a part of.

[Asker]

yeah but we talk all the time except when he's at work or when im at uni.

[In_Trance]

You asked. I answered. I think you're wasting your time and you're gonna pay for this.
But you do you

[Greenbins]

You need to have a serious conversation about this.

[Iron_Man]

Keep talking to him about this

[Asker]

how will that help

[Iron_Man]

To find out the exact details

[Asker]

idkk we just keep arguing and he keeps saying its not a big deal its just 2-3 years