Why do men cheat on their pretty girlfriends?

Question

When I came to Shanghai this afternoon, I made a post about it and an old acquaintance of mine, who’s a celebrity here and who I met back at my time in Beijing, he messaged me saying “I’m going to be in Shanghai soon and I’d love to meet you.”

I didn’t like it , because I know he has a girlfriend and I have zero interest in being an other girl, when we met in Beijing, he was single and he probably thought since we met at a bar, he could invite me to watch a movie together at his home, I didn’t go, I told him I wasn’t interested, he told me, he really just meant a movie, without any other intentions.

He was devilishly handsome but I have zero interest in going to the homes of people I barely know to “just watch a movie together with them”. So, I didn’t go and we haven’t talked since then.

He messaged me now, I don’t know why he figured I am interested to meet him when I know perfectly well, he has gotten a girlfriend after our meeting in Beijing.

Why would a taken man want to meet different girls while visiting another city? Isn’t that a potential cheating?

So, I know it’s not exactly cheating, but I feel like he would be fine with it, had I been into it as well.

Thankfully, I have zero interest in meeting him, I just wonder why do men who have pretty girlfriends and happy relationships, still look for other girls?

Updates

9 mo

His girlfriend is a model, very beautiful one and he always posts their pictures together. That guy is not deprived of sex I am sure, because he’s very handsome, I am probably a very rare case when a girl refuses to sleep with hum, because when I showed his pics to my friends, they said “How could you tell NO to him?” and one guy friend of me told me he would turn gay for him haha.

So I don’t think he is deprived of sex. I don’t care to be honest, he’s not interesting to me.

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

Because they easily assume their girlfriend is cheating on them , especially if his girlfriend is getting a lot more attention from other men or she seeks validation from other men , Most beautiful girls’ get way more attention then Guy’s do. Most guy’s are very territorial over a girl he get’s into a relationship with , he wants a girl that only looks up to him and has eyes for him , a girl that values him and makes him feel wanted , if she suddenly makes him feel that he is wrong for getting upset over the attention she is receiving from other men it will raise his insecurity levels and make him feel like she doesn’t respect him , making him feel he isn’t good enough for her or that she is stringing him along until something better comes along or that she is secretly cheating on him , Most girls’ assume her man is being insecure or jealous if he doesn’t trust her being around other Guy’s The truth is it has nothing to do with insecurities , it comes down to respect for each other. Most guy’s know what other Guy’s are thinking , where most girl’s do not , Just like most girls’ know what other girl’s are thinking and guys do not , so he might assume that she might be up to no good and that she doesn’t truly value him and love him , leaving him feeling unsure about his relationship with her, Sadly most people in general are selfish people that will try to find a replacement or try to be accepted by someone else before ending a relationship with someone , because they feel like that other person will save them and feel they had a right to cheat by trying to play a victim. Most people can’t admit to their wrong doings , they always point fingers at someone else for their actions mainly their partner , they don’t point fingers at themselves first , cuz they can’t accept the fact that they are the POS. So by him wanting to spend time with you, shows his true colors of who he truly is , He doesn’t love his girlfriend, if he is secretly chatting and flirting with other girls period , He just likes the convenience of her but he doesn’t truly value her. Sadly girls’ do this shit as well , and that’s why so many relationships fail or someone gets cheated on , it’s because they are selfish people that only really care about themselves. The only way relationships can survive and for love to grow is of both partners’ make each other their top priority , if you aren’t your partner’s top priority be prepared to have another failed relationship. Selfishness is one of the biggest relationship killers , do not get into a committed relationship with someone if you do not know how to remove your inner selfishness for someone, you will only be wasting
Your time and theirs. He is wasting his time by pretending he loves his girlfriend cuz he truly doesn’t

Lionman95 · Accepted Answer

I think guys that cheat don´t do that because of how their girlfriends look but because they need the validation of others to be happy and confident in their life.
Sure it´s more tempting to cheat when you don´t find your girlfriend physically attractive but I doubt that´s the only reason.
I think there are two types of people in extremes:
People that need others to happy, people that prefer to being on their own and prefer to validate themselves with what they achieve.
I think your case falls in the first situation and the guy you´re talking to needs the validation of other women too that the more women he can attract the better he feels about himself.

desidoll · Accepted Answer

Men don’t stay loyal for look alone. I used to think the same way. We women emphasize on look so much that we feel if we are the prettiest woman in the room, our man will never turn away. This is 100% wrong. You mentioned how they seem to be happy and open about each other on social media. Another misconception about what defined a happy marriage/relationship. The truth is nobody really knows what’s going on with their relationship. People often don’t reveal the bad side of it for various reasons. They could have some unresolved issues that need to work on. Regardless, the fact that he intended to cheat on her with you shows how disrespectful he is towards her. Doesn’t matter if she has the shittiest personality, he can always leave instead of choosing to go behind her back like that. I hope she knows the real him one day.

midnightmoon05 · Accepted Answer

It’s common in China big cities…all these started way back around early 1990s when China/HK trade and many others doing businesss in China. Open prostitution/free sex with or w/o wife/partner/gf…was free for all.
I was there and saw so many young women just go with anyone at anytime. It was an eye opening for me.
I have no idea why…I just noticed while living there for a few months.

Staximus · Answer

He probably just wants to add you to his list of women who are available for sex. Some guys feel the need to feed their own ego by having sex with as many women as possible. For some it makes them feel like a bigger man, a dominant conqueror. It's a power thing. Deep down inside they are trying to reassure themselves that they are god's gift to women or the world, searching for acceptance, approval, praise, adulation. They can't stand to be alone until they get back to their girlfriend or wife who feeds their ego. Basically that is what they need to maintain self-confidence, or they are just sex crazed horny bastards.

Christoff92 · Answer

For what you're saying in your posting. He's probably very sexually obsessed and assuming ain't getting that much intention from his girlfriend. So probably can see you a lot not like her.

But you're not going to be anyway just for him. So that's good that suspiciously he ain't going to play a fast one. So that's good. Keep it up 😀

molonski2 · Answer

Its pretty simple , and her looks have little to do with it , but most guys whether they admit it or not like to have multiples , I'm even saying that had you gone to this outing it would have immediately been intimate , but much of it is the trill of the chase etc , but its got nothing to do with the looks of the girl.

Its also possible ( maybe unlikely ) that for some reason its not working sexually , but really any half decent guy being honest , particularly in Asia , will have 1or 2 Geek , and that's how he likes it.

inhua · Answer

there's only 2 main reasons why men would cheat and it's not for the reasons others have suggested

1) he's a bad boy/jerk/fuckboy who's gonna cheat regardless of what she does and he doesn't give a shit about her feelings

2) he's being deprived of sex, love, appreciation etc. and he can't leave her (gynocentric divorce laws being a possible reason) so he seeks out his needs elsewhere to someone who would give it him

and given that men are instinctively polygamous by nature, they are less picky and less discriminatory of who they have sex with. his affair partner doesn't have to be prettier than his girlfriend. his affair partner could be butt ugly and he can still cheat

now if men were instinctively hypergamous by nature like women, pretty girlfriends wouldn't get cheated on by their spouses except with women who are much prettier

RingOfFire · Answer

Men are designed to hunt women. Whatever they have they want more. Also, no matter how hot a woman is, eventually they get tired of the same thing. At least that's the natural instinct. Sometimes they can get past that, but for a lot of men it is a constant conflict between the way nature designed them and societal expectations.

kakaling · Answer

Girls should have "girl" friends and not "guy" friends.

Guys should have "guy" friends and not "girl" friends.

Whenever opposite sex wants to be "friend" it's because you are not in the "never have a chance with me zone", it's a better name for backup options. Just imagine an unattractive stranger wants to be a friend with you, will you ever give him/her a chance? Opposite sex be a "friend" is always an excuse for keeping all the attractive person in contact.

KingOfMe1 · Answer

Because sex is a drug @lafemmefatale_1 I think many girls don't understand that. Men are triggers more easily than women. I think... People on drugs don't think rationally because it is their subconscious controlling them not logic. However, a cheater can stop cheating. However most people aren't taught how self discipline actually works. Has nothing to do with action. It's really just a self discipline issue. Same with people and food etc. Ofc that also is a self image thing too.

WindAtMyBack · Answer

Because he can. --- "He was devilishly handsome"

Anonymous · Answer

Why do women think that sex with a hot woman must necessarilly be great. I have had four different girflfriends in my life, and if I ranked them from most attractive to least attractive, and then ranked them from best to worst in how good and satisfying they were in bed, the rankings would literally be completely opposite. The hottest one was the worst in bed, and the least physically attractve one was by far the best in bed.

People cheat because they are not fullfilled in their relationship, and that has little to do with how attractive their partners are.

hahahmm · Answer

Men don't stay loyal or even take you seriously because you look good. Yeah, some guys will for a while but not forever. To keep a man you need to actually have character qualities that men value. Some women just can't grasp this or refuse to accept it. of course you should get it because women are the inventors of pretending to take someone serious just to get benefits out of the situation.

RavVid · Answer

Straight to the evolutionary framework: Monopolizing the breeding capacity of one girl is good (more is better if poss) plus taking any breeding opportunities on the side will maximize the number the number of offspring a guy can have.

Just as none of us are descended from good priests or nuns, we are probably all descended from men who took the side breeding opps when they presented.

Agreed we don't want the child support costs of today and it is a risky strategy.

Anonymous · Answer

As someone who has no interest in cheating and is quite strictly monogamous, I can easily tell you it's because 2 is better than 1.

There's also something to be said about the appeal of novelty, and the novelty of a girlfriend gradually depreciating.

That doesn't mean it's okay, but that's the reason.

Anonymous · Answer

he probably doesn't love his girlfriend that's why, and he probably got bored of just fucking her for that reason or never planned on being loyal in the first place, so he wants to fuck other girls too

if you're for real cos the celebrity thing is a kinda sus (not saying your lying but you know what i mean) like who is it lol, spill the tea. or like at least what does he do? is he an actor, model, singer, idol, etc?

love_conquers_lust · Answer

Your “friends” said that? What kind of company do you keep?

But I’ve encountered that my whole life. I usually get people confessing unsolicited shit to me looking for my approval or blessing or something, “if XYZ didn’t say it was wrong, it must be okay.”…. wrong.

Adaeva · Answer

Because they are the men that can cheat. Men that are not desirable enough to have pretty girlfriend seldom cheat because women are primarily interested in sex with very good looking guys. Most women reject average and below average guys.

Raaj4you · Answer

I don't know why? guys cheat. If I don't get enough sex from my girlfriend I would definitely breakup and move to another girl.

The guy you are talking about might be sexually deprived that's why he is interested in you. You should have gone to his place to watch a movie.

Shy_Steve · Answer

Because you Girls are attracted to the Guys that are more likely to do that, At the end of the day you chose that Guy.

Your completely ignoring the Guys that would never do that, With most Girls usually that's the Confident Guy or the Guy that talks to a fair few other Girls.

Gramkabir · Answer

There are two reasons behind this.

1. He's not happy with his existing one.

2. He loves to have sex with other women.

I agree this is cheating but that's the mentality of these types of men. Eventually, girls like these men love to go out with multiple girls.

Anonymous · Answer

Well odds are if she' "pretty" she chose an attractive man (that's just the way it typically works). If she chose appearance over character than yeah, she's gonna get cheated on most likely. But bo worries! Because if she chose appearance over character then odds are she has no quams about cheating on him either. So they're actually a pretty good match. 🤣

justabuddy · Answer

People cheat for usually the following reasons...

1. They are in an unfulfilling relationship.
2. They don't think through the consequences.
3. They get an adrenaline rush out of it.
4. They have low self esteem.
5. They crave sexual variety.
6. Revenge.
7. They are in an unhealthy relationship.
8. Their passion has died for their current relationship.

And yes I had to Google this to remember it all.

Why do men cheat on their pretty girlfriends?

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