I've never been to a Cheesecake Factory, but I love cheesecake. Applebee's is nasty, no one should go there, ever. Chili's is low tier, but I'd be down to grab some Chipotle and go somewhere else (park, beach, &c.) to enjoy it. Their ambience is trash. Olive Garden and a few of the others (Red Lobster, a buffet, IHOP, Denny's, &c.) are just basic and I don't think a separate entry is needed for each one. You could just say "don't go to a chain for a date"
My house is a good spot, but I get there needs to be some trust, so depends on how you arranged this first date. If it was just a cute girl I saw out and got her number for a date, 100%. But if this is someone I've known professionally or casually for some time, I see nothing wrong with having her over to make dinner for her. It's actually somewhat ideal: a comfortable setting where I control everything from music to lighting, show off cooking skills, treat her to wine or something relaxing, and we can do whatever we like from a casual hang out to potentially having sex and she stays over. For the same reasons, her house is equally appealing. But for people who have some sense of established trust, as I said.
Agree movies suck, you sit in the dark and say nothing/little for 2 hours. Not an intimacy builder.
Coffee and ice cream type dates are great. Inexpensive, low commitment on time as well; if it goes well we can extend, if not, we say buh bye and no hard feelings.
big ballers
Bowling or some other sport seems fine. Someone will need to educate me on what's wrong with a low-skill, low-competition, low-expectation sports activity. Playing pool, hiking, tennis, paddleboarding, kayaking, &c. these are all great. Also, a woman who isn't down for a little sport now and again is not likely to keep up with me.
One could argue no place is good enough according to this list.
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3 Reply
Asker
+1 y
The Cheesecake Factory is delicious. I’ve been there a couple of times with family.
my cousins (they are siblings to each other) used to work there, but in a city far away and I never managed to go there. There's never been one in a city I lived in.
Holy fiddle sticks, how in tarnation is Apple Bee’s in #2? That place has amazing food and deserves better recognition. However, I can understand if she’d be upset that the guy offered Apple Bee’s over Red Robin. Their bacon cheeseburger with extra bacon is LITERALLY something delivered straight from heaven. I had it for the first time last Saturday and it had me ascending into the 4th dimension. I elucidated all of the hidden truths the universe has to offer from Area 50 to even beyond our own realm.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
Most of these were fine for a first date is fine though some are not fine especially if you don't know the guy all that well.
7. Your house. When I was single and dating my husband there was no way I was going to his place.
15. The Gym. I'm just not sure how that would work. Unless you both knew each other and went to the gym together. Like my husband when we were first dating used to meet up at the gym sometimes. First date are you supposed to watch the guy bench pressing?
16. At church. I met my husband at mass but it wasn't our first date. Church events and charity work can be a great place to meet good guys but going to church I'm not so sure. Maybe you get to talk after on the walk home. I think going to church together should be like date 10 or 20, as you are basically low key telling everyone at church yiubdating seriously.
20. Family functions is not first date material. Maybe 2nd date, unless you've known each other for a long time.
21. Home movie night. Not for a first date, I'd have had to get to know the guy first.
22. Long drive on a first date? That's dangerous.
24. Nightclub is Maybe somewhere you might meet and arrange to go on a first date, you know exchanging numbers.
25. Hookah bar, I had to look that up. I don't smoke so maybe if it was part of an overall date.
The food places on the list are actually fine. I love the olive garden& cheese cake factory. I think the first date is all about breaking the ice and starting to get to know each other through conversation you know so coffee, a meal, a drink at the bar are the kind of settings you want and then maybe the more exciting stuff like a nightclub, cinema, sports events, line dancing, feis, prom or whatever.
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Church is definitely not a place for a date
Family function definitely no if it is a first date. That should come later
Coffee is a no for me because I don't drink coffee at all.
I went on a date to the movies and it wasn't that bad, but probably not ideal for a first date, because you can't really talk and get to know someone while watching the movie.
I don't drink alcohol
I'd be happy to go to a fast food restaurant like mcdonalds.
The gym is for working out. Unless you are both are really into fitness than it might work
The other places I have no idea what those are because they don't exist where I live.
Most of those are ridiculous. There are a few that make sense. The gym, church, home, nightclub.
The rest are just silly. Movies I'd even agree with as far as it being a poor choice for the guy to pick because you cannot really talk and get to know each other.
The rest, they are just silly. Most are just places to eat. A woman who'd actually refuse to go on the date and pulls a "I will not go to Cheesecake Factory or Olive Garden... etc."
That would probably be a "never mind, I rescind my date request, have a nice life, bye"
Unless she had a good reply when I said "oh, why not". She better come back with, I had a really bad experience there and got sick and I can't eat there anymore. If it is just a "that place is not special/high end enough for me then I'm just leaving.
I always did what I wanted and brought the woman along. With my wife, I asked her out at about five minutes after midnight on New Year’s while we were dancing to a slow song as I knew the band and had asked them to do so after midnight for this purpose. I asked her out to a very large New Year’s parade in our city. A couple days later I took her to a casino and on the ride there I reached behind the seat for a bottle of wine and two glasses. We had a truly great time, we won a bit and she actually considers that our first date.
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0 Reply
Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Church is not for dates. It's the House of the Lord.
Obviously the guy is not going to my house.
The Gym is for working out.
I don't drink coffee or eat anything with caffeine. The only coffee place I know is Starbucks but they have other options bedside coffee.
Lol he ain't gonna meet my family on the first date.
I ain't gonna Netflix and chill with him
Nightclub? Like a dance club?
I'm not Arab and I don't smoke hookah or any other kind of drug.
I don't drink alcohol.
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1 Reply
Asker
+1 y
You do realize Americans smoke hookah, right? I have friends and family who smoked hookah before. Also, down in Cancun, Mexico one of the resorts I stayed at has a spot for people to smoke hookahs.
What are you talking about? I would be fine with going to most of those places on a first date. But then I wouldn't be looking for sex either - giving or getting. 7,15, 20, 24, 25, 26, and 28 would be a "pass". A long drive out to the desert to ride dirt bikes, or up to Big Bear would be fine though.
I'd refuse to go to 6, 7, 15, 20, 21, 22, 24 and 28 on a first date because they're just pointless. You either can't talk (movies, clubs, kind of sports events too), meeting family before you even know if you want to be with somebody is awkwards, and a long drive is just unsafe for the first one. And a gym is not a date, wtf. I'd also refuse 25 because that's just not where I go in general, and that goes for 16 as well (plus talking). I don't see a problem with anything else
They all seem fine to me besides the movie night/his house if you don't know them or somewhere that requires a long drive because there isn't any trust yet for that. Mind you, I did go to a guys house on first meeting because I didn't really care of the out come but he never did anything weird or scary LOL
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
This is perfect. From now on I will ONLY be taking women to one of those places on a first date as a means to eliminate the shallow, entitled, low value women who think they are too high value to be taken to one of thse places. Thanks for sharing this. I will print it and tack it to my whiteboard for future reference.
i think it is a silly exaggeration. women like lots of these as first dates. I also think that social media has created political extremism and an air of mistrust and men and women are both more uncomfortable around eachother than they used to be.
@Simslover92 good on you. the date isn't really about the place anyway, it's about the company. You could have a great date at a Sonic if it's with the right person.
@zeitgeist057 exactly. My boyfriend took me to a Mexican restaurant for our first date and it was about the experience of just being with him that made it special not the place.
Well, unless I know her somewhat I will always start with something like a coffee date. I do this because I want to know that she is into me and not a free meal before I will do something like Pelican Grill or Mastro's or Andrea.
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