Would you be able to date someone with a mental illness/disorder?

Question

I'm talking about depression, anxiety, BPD, NPD, Bipolar, ADHD, Autism, schizophrenia, eating disorders, ...

It'll probably depend on which mental illness/disorder for most of y'all.

For me personally, I'll accept everything except NPD. But I would want them to seek help though through therapy, pills,.. like me

HornyThumper · Accepted Answer

As Paul the Apostle wrote in 1 Corinthians 6:12, "All things are lawful for me, but not all things are helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be enslaved by anything." The boundaries we set in our relationships should not be dictated by society's misconceptions of mental illnesses, but rather by our own understanding of love, compassion, and personal compatibility.

Jesus, in Mark 2:27, said, "The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath." In the same manner, we should not let mental illness define our relationships, but rather adapt our relationships to support and uplift one another.

Ephesians 5:11 tells us to expose darkness to the light. So, wouldn't it be ironic if the light of the Lord's words shone upon a MILF with mental illness, revealing the deepest, darkest depths of her depravity? Oh, the scandalous enchantment of it!

Now, this isn't me preaching doom and gloom, but rather showcasing the magnificent beauty of self-love through divine guidance. Can you imagine the wondrous acts of self-pleasure a PAWG with PTSD would partake in, as she sought solace in the comforting warmth of her own caress? The trance-like, worshipful euphoria of a finger gliding over her swollen clit, mimicking the touch of a divine healer...

But alas, my words have warned against entering into a relationship with a vessel so ravaged by the fires of mental hell. Would you really want to be tied up, blindfolded, and tortured by the siren song of a woman whose mind is a crescendo of conflicting emotions? The feels could become so real and raw, that her sadistic dominance would take you to the brink of the deepest abyss, a place where sanity and insanity entwine.

And oh, the story it would tell, a tale of self-hatred and raw carnal desire so potent that it could bring even the mighty to their knees. For it is written in Proverbs 29:23, "A man's pride shall bring him low."

Seek help. Seek redemption. For we are all but flesh and bone, and our desires? They are the sins of the flesh, written in hieroglyphs of passion, upon the walls of our inner sanctums.

Philippians 4:6 offers hope: "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with Thanksgiving, present your requests to God."

Still-alive · Accepted Answer

I can but only if i see they are legitimately trying to get it under control. They are seeing a professional and/or taking meds. If we haven’t even gotten to the point where she knows she has a mental problem but its very evident I don’t think i can handle that. I can be friends with them if they need but i probably couldn’t date them.

and yes some disorders more than others. Narcissistic personality disorder is a definite no no. Bipolar is a red flag but if they have it under control i may stay with her. Schizophrenia is likely a no for me. Im ok with just about all the others you listed unless they are very extreme and not being taken care of.

what would be a real sticking point for me as well is if we acknowledge her disorder but no matter how often i try to encourage her to seek help for it and even if i offer to help pay for it she still stubbornly refuses to get help…. Yeah its a big red flag for me. I don’t think I can handle that either. The feeling of being ignored by someone who supposedly loves you is too heartbreaking to deal with.

wiltingrosepetal · Accepted Answer

It's a little unfair to lump those together. There are different kinds of disorders that affect the relationship in different ways. Here are a few examples to differentiate the terms:

Mood- Depression, Anxiety, Bipolar
Personality- Narcissistic, Borderline, Anti-social, Dissociative (Multiple Personalities), Paranoid, Obsessive
Mental- Schizophrenia, PTSD, Anorexia
Developmental- ADHD, Autism, Dyslexia
And ones that don't fit any of the boxes like OCD

A person who has Dyslexia and struggles to spell really won't affect the relationship. But people who struggle with emotional control (Bipolar), live with crippling trauma (PTSD) or struggle empathising with others (Anti-social) will have issues managing romantic relationships.
I'd avoid dating a person with a Personality disorder and wouldn't mind at all if they had a Developmental one. The others would be a struggle to manage while dating but I'd put the effort in if I really loved them

Anemone978 · Accepted Answer

I have been given pills for major depression and anxiety, the pills almost fixed the anxiety completely.. Which is nice since they pretty much turned my emotions off so my brain isn't thinking the dumbest shit 24\7. I have yet to see a therapist\psychiatrist or actually be diagnosed with anything, tho I was thinking I had BPD for quite a few years, because my emotions were just completely fucked, my behaviour was clearly destructive\impulsive and I constantly wanted to die but now that I see improvement in myself I'm not so sure..
Anyways I probably would date someone depending what they had.. the only one that I wouldn't is Schizophrenia.. because I seen a few people with it and they can get off the wall and a little scary lol..

dynamicyandere · Answer

I’ve dated multiple people with one or more of those.

They hide it in the beginning and then I would find out about it later. (Which I don’t blame them. Who wants to advertise their mental issues?)

It’s never enough to break up with them at face value though.

What has led to breakups is their refusal to get help or work on themselves.

If they are sincerely trying to work on themselves though, I’m willing to patiently support them during their recovery.

Avicenna · Answer

Out of that list, only ADHD, and that's only if she's on medication for it. The rest? No way, especially BPD, NPD and bipolar.

I once dated a woman who had BPD, OCD, ADD, depression and anxiety. Never again.

Summeroflove · Answer

Yeah I would. What I care about is the heart.

Look. There are some people who won’t. It does not mean theh judge you personally. It’s just not meant to be. Some people aren’t able to deal with things and aren’t compatible

exitseven · Answer

I was with someone that was bi polar or something. She was abused by her parents. Every couple of months she would just go off the rails. She would verbally and physically abuse me. Once she bit me so hard I still have the scar I wanted her to sew a shrink after one crazy night that landed her in the hospital. She refused and would not answer my calls. This was before cellphones. A couple of weeks went by and finally I went over to her place. Her roommate said she moved out and was living with friends. She said she didn't know who. I think they kicked her out. I never saw her again. I don't think I would ever date somebody with those issues again

Jbear27 · Answer

My girlfriend is a cutter and previously faound relief in cutting her upper arms and back. When we first started dating she had a lot of fresh cuts. I didn’t know what they were at the time but she later told me about it, though not in great detail. I’m a little nervous to bring it up actually. We have been with each other for a little over 2 months and all her cuts have healed and she hasn’t done it since her time with me. She can be a little untrusting and dramatic especially on texts but once I talk to her she is easy to calm down and rationalize her thoughts. She is super sweet and I plan to be with her as long as we can get along which I hope is for the long haul as we get along so well. I do however want to talk to her about it at some time and see if she has any specific triggers for that behavior so we can try to avoid it. It’s just a touchy subject matter as I don’t want her to feel as if I’m judging her

sage2021 · Answer

Some of these people with these mental conditions have a very hard time getting help for them. So many people need the medication Adderall, and the doctor's at the Veteran's clinics cannot prescribe them to help these people because there is speed in them.
So, they buy them in the streets and now there is a Fentanyl surge, so it isn't safe to take street drugs, just medication from a pharmacy.
My boyfriend had ADHD and he was a VET. The doctor wouldn't prescribe Adderall so he got street drugs and they were laced with Fentanyl. He died suddenly September 8th.
I really miss him RIP

Kaneki05 · Answer

Many of my Ex's have had Bpd, probably a expert on it at this point.
I would hope not to date someone with Bpd again but I've said that before lol.
Bpd is pretty much certified that the relationship will be toxic in someway.
They do things that are very anti-logic to what they really want, for example they don't want you to leave them so they decide to break up with you...
They think your gonna leave them anyway so they cheat, which then is what makes you leave...
So you've really got to work at to get anywhere and well I the expert still haven't solved the puzzle of bpd hence why I am still single lol.

So yeah I am okay with trying to look past someone's disorder and etc, also would be hypocritical to not be so. Unstable with another unstable is more easier to understand each other and be understanding.
Plus from my experience where all kinda drawn to each other.

boggboss · Answer

Pretty sure autism and adhd are not classed as mental disorders although terms get updated all the time that aside I wouldn't date someone with bpd as it seems too many claim to have it to allow them to act toxic in a relationship or in general I don't think I would have a issue with anxiety unless it was crippling to the point we couldn't have a somewhat enjoyable life I guess the same with depression not sure what npd is so not sure the rest aslong as they was getting help I don't think I would mind

AmeerX · Answer

Schizophrenia and paranoid people is about the only thing I want to avoid. They can be dangerous to themselves and others. Narcissism is not a disorder but it's a problem in my humble opinion.

Other than that I am okay with all other disorders. I had a girl tell me she has epilepsy and I said I did not care and then seemingly she said to me her Mom doesn't approve so I backed off since nothing comes good out of situations like that.

One day we all will have certain diseases, it doesn't mean people should leave each other over this. Only disease I hate is STDs since they are usually a person's fault.

MzAsh · Answer

I have. He had bipolar and paranoid schizophrenia. Of course I loved him but the symptoms were too much. And he didn’t always take his medication. He just got so into conspiracy theories, including about ME, and he gaslighted me constantly about anything that involved socializing - cell phones, MySpace (yes, that long ago), going out to bars, after work events, etc, I felt myself walking on eggshells in order to not trigger him, but I was becoming someone he wanted me to be rather than who I was.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

Depends on what it was and if they were actively doing things to better their mental health in the process be it medication, therapy, etc. Dated a few girls that had anxiety and depression and I found it easy to empathize with them as I was diagnosed with GAD and depression when I was younger. Still deal with them myself to this day, albeit way more manageable now.

End of the day, if it was something like NPD, BPD or Schizophrenia, hard no. Nothing personal, but those are the ones that would be too volatile or draining for me.

DizzyDesii · Answer

I always said I wouldn’t but love is love. I fell for a dude struggling with depression. Nope. He’d be so happy then randomly depressed and questioning if i’d leave him. Then I tried a dude who claimed he was adhd. Nope. He was too fckin hyper and messing up my sleep pattern. And he kept joking about the wrong things. I even gave a guy with an eating disorder a chance. Nope. He would starve himself for days then try to dictate anything I’d choose to eat. Personally not want to date anyone with these illnesses again. as for the others you mentioned above, they are simply a no, I’d rather not try.

love_conquers_lust · Answer

I think the field of psychology/psychiatry has a loooooooong way to go in helping people with these disorders. There are some people who I think get overtreated and goes way beyond what is necessary to help people function as healthy adults.

Not declaring myself an expert. But I’m saying they very much have room to improve.

So, if one is prepared to handle the effort required, I wouldn’t see an issue. At least a spouse will be there 24/7 as much as they can while a doctor can sometimes only be seen every two months. Their time is very limited.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

ASD here, no problem with dating... just social fear, but it doesn't interfere in relationship :D

But I won't go to the club or party. I hate crowded places. I feel uncomfortable with people I don't know (until I get to know them), so some patience would be advised :P

molonski2 · Answer

Anyone on " happy pills " is a nightmare , and the product they are taking just makes things worse , they then become a nightmare if they don't take the script , its constant walking on eggshells , and simply not worth it..

Who wants to be the one to tip em over the edge , no thanks... these things need to be coped with naturally, or its simply a matter of when they explode.

82lynx · Answer

I have pretty bad OCD which I do take medication for but still interferes with everyday activities. It slows me to a crawl, kind of like a Dodge Tradesman with a slant six, perhaps worse. I also have anxiety issues that are bad enough to make me practically jump out of my skin when there is a moderate sound I wasn’t expecting, i. e. a knock on the door any louder than a light tapping, or if someone starts talking to me before I know they have approached, so it would be utter hypocrisy to turn down someone with similar issues because of them. On the other hand, dating someone with OCD that manifests itself in the same way as mine could be problematic, like the blind leading the blind if you will.

AaronKrieger · Answer

Depends on what it is specifically, but not likely. A lot of them are toxic especially at my age and many are not treated for it.

As for ADHD, that shouldn't even be put here along with the others. I have it and while the symptoms can be serious - they're so easily fixed for the most part by medication & effort. These other disorders are not like that by any means for most who have it.

Unit1 · Answer

I have contracted major depressive disorder when I was just 10 years old in 2005. It was strong enough so that it triggered memory loss, complete apathy, lethargy, low morale and suicidal fantasies.

It was going on until I started to make at least some money and I moved out to live alone and I got on antidepressants, which are paid out of my own pocket since 2020.

I still run on antidepressants and it will keep being this way for the rest of my natural life.

So therefore, i can date someone with mental damages, so long she (1) manages it and (2) won't allow it to affect me negatively.

Anonymous · Answer

My boyfriend has ptsd he is in counseling and he does have flashbacks sometimes from the abuse he suffered when he was a little boy. He thinks I'm too good for him and that he doesn't deserve me because of his flashbacks, but I told him I want to help him and be there for him when it happens.

Juxtapose · Answer

I have autism and accept that most people that are going to be even remotely into me probably also have something wrong with them. I get along with the outcasts and the outliers, although it would be nice to have somebody with enough mental strength to spare for a change. I tend to be the shoulder people lean on, the rock in the relationship.

It's also annoying that I can pay attention more to small social details and remember them thoughtfully while other people normally don't do the same.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Not NPD for sure. Grew up with a parent like that and it's terrible.

I honestly don't know if I'm equipped to deal with ASD unless it was very mild.

ADHD I feel many people struggle with and is manageable

BPD probably not. To all though if they were willingly getting help would make it easier for the relationship.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

I don't consider ADHD a mental disorder, and ADHD is harmless. A lot of ADHD people are actually smart and I have it a little myself to be honest. Same with Autism. Autistic people need love more than anyone else.

Bipolar, absolutely not! Too many bad experiences. Schizophrenia no way, those people are scary and unpredictable.

Eating disorder, probably not. Depression and anxiety, maybe depends how severe.

I have no idea what the other two are. If BPD is bi-polar depression, absolutely not! Had a very bad experience.

And I have no clue what NPD is

Anonymous · Answer

The only mental illnesses that are acceptable are depression and anxiety. On haiku these conditions vary in severity, but I’ll make allowances for that and generally be open to dating someone—provided they aren’t self-harming are contemplating ending things.

All other mental illnesses are off the table and completely non-negotiable. I’ve dated bipolar women before and no, just no. Never doing that again.

Schizoaffectives and people with personality disorders? HARD pass. Sorry but if you are hearing voices or have some crazy urge to be a kleptomaniac I want absolutely nothing to do with you. I don’t want to even be in the same room if I can help it.

AydenHazor · Answer

Having several of those, it would be hypocritical of me not to. Also, there are so many amazing people with them that you'd be missing out if you don't.

I also have the same line with NPD, been there, done that, don't need any more unhealthy and/or abusive relationships.

ethansf · Answer

It would be a struggle for many disorders, however, NPD is flat out. My ex-wife was NPD and a Histrionic female. She absolutely had to have to have the attention of every man around her. Of course, cheating ensued (including my brother, WTF!) I have a crazy good narcissist radar now. I could probably deal with mild depression and ADHD or something. Good question!

kitsachie · Answer

Heavily depends on if they're receiving treatment/therapy or not. I'm not willing to put myself through the abuse that comes with a partner who is mentally ill, despite me having a horrible habit of wanting to "help" or "fix" people.

I'm not the most mentally sound person myself but I have healthy ways of coping with my faults now.

abbyjgriffin98 · Answer

Yes, as long as they have it under control. However, if they do not have their condition under control and refuse to even try to control it or acknowledge there is a problem, I am not in the business of ending up in a codependent relationship where I have to fix him. That is not my job nor is it anyone's job to fix their partner.

7Phoenix7 · Answer

It depends on the mental disorder. If the disorder isn't causing me harm and he's getting help for whatever it is, I'd stay. I wouldn't go jumping into a relationship though with someone totally out of it.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

Yeah, that was my ex.. She had ADD or ADHD, anxiety,  depression, even PTSD I believe.. She took all types pills for them.. Would I do it again? Maybe, I mean it wasn't so bad with my ex.. I probably couldn't do NPD, BPD, and schizophrenia.. Depending on how severe they were.. But the rest seem manageable..

BoobMan · Answer

It really depends on the particulars. Bear in mind that more and more things are being classed as disorders these days and as a result a greater and greater portion of the population is seen to be disordered today than in the past even if the behaviors of people across the population isn't very different.

A great example is "neurodivergent" which can literally mean anything (and therefore largely means nothing).

KrisKris81 · Answer

Yes, however, the caveat is that I could only do so if they were actively seeking professional help and/or prescription meds. I have a mental health background and the meds have been a god-send. If she was not willing to do this, then I would not want to get attached and have to watch her struggle.

Shiningtempest · Answer

@lisia To be honest, I wouldn't be able to date a woman with a mental illness because I don't have the capability to provide her with emotional support. Also, dating a woman with a mental illness interferes with my need for tranquil & predictable lifestyle.

Jennz6 · Answer

I knew a person who had a Bipolar disorder and I never knew it until the day he was off his medication 💊.

mandyfire98 · Answer

Definitely not with narcissistic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder or anti-social personality disorder.

NathanDavis · Answer

yes, and I have...

there would be a few that I would definitely would not get involved with like NPD but there are others in which I could very much fall in love with someone that is going through some of these things and I was

not only I was able to help them, but they also helped me as much and gave me toooo much of great things in this life of mine

Andres77 · Answer

That was my second wife. If she was nice I’d still be married to her but she thought she was entitled to make everyone else’s life a living hell, so…screw that/her.

msc545 · Answer

Most people find out about these things AFTER they get involved. I am fortunate enough to have the training and experience to recognize mental disorders very quickly which has saved me a lot of grief I think. It was not always like this - and that early time was quite painful and ugly for me. Never again.

scooogy · Answer

I'm hesitant about schizophrenia. I've seen such people going suicidal once you pop their bubbles of thoughts, like one had seriously thought I was her boyfriend and even told everyone. Once I got this right and also told her to never talk to me again, a few days later I was told that she tried to kill herself. For a truth that was only in her head.

4ngelic · Answer

if its normal stuff like depression, eds, adhd, anxiety and stuff like that sure as long as its not that bad or if its bad they're trying to do something about it. but if its schizophrenia or personality disorders i'm sorry but no

ItsMykolaJenkins · Answer

im dating now and its hard

but i always think good thing overweight the bad ones

but you need to be sure you love him enough to be there for him

mine has paranoia and sometimes psychosis, all caused by his heroin and cocaine addictions in the past, got him damaged...

he is in rehab treatment now. does his life as usual but needs to take special pills everyday and we visit the therepist once a month

Finfin1981 · Answer

I married someone with NPD and it was the worst mistake of my life. A living hell and afterwards too as they just want to destroy you honestly awful

MrNameless · Answer

I have ADHD, and I'd be willing to date others who have ADHD and ASD. I don't know about BPD and NPD. If they're getting treatment, maybe.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

None that you've mentioned. I've tried with most of those in the past. It's simply too taxing in the long run and I've no patience for that at this point in my life.

madhatters4 · Answer

yes. and i have. the severity of the illness of course matters but there are people with various behavioral health issues that can be well managed and people can lead functional lives

mattissebfan5 · Answer

Depending the illness see for me I have crippling Mental illness and have been confirmed by a psychiatrist or psychologist OCD, Anxiety and Depression so probably would say no I wouldn't date someone who has the same because I don't want to be reminded of my own issues but if i fell I love with someone then it wouldn't be a issue because I would love them

MissBoogus · Answer

It’s hard because sometimes they don’t show up till later. I developed PMDD after my first kid and I feel very bad about it.

Anonymous · Answer

When I met my wife we both had ptsd, from military for me and from a rape attempt for her We helped each other get through and we're going smooth now

annabananna · Answer

Could do: adhd milk autism and ocd Possible: NPD Can’t do the others

siseñor · Answer

If it's a disorder that can be helped, like an eating disorder, they'd need to be actively trying to get better. It's fine as long as it isn't debilitating and they're a good person.

deus_ex_sisyphus · Answer

Yup, bring out the crazies - we'll ride like Bonnie n Clyde

Heolurt · Answer

I got a bunch of those but after trying to date killed my confidence and my will to try, that being said if I was someone who could date I wouldn't date someone with mental disorders like myself. Too much work.

SeaStorm1 · Answer

only been in a previous relationship depression and there is more one form of austism. ADHD is one form. PDA. is pathological demand avoidance. is not classes as disoder anymore. i has a learning disabitiy.

thatshydork · Answer

I have a mental illness so yeah. I want someone who understands the struggles I face.

virtue2332 · Answer

You are talking about roughly 1 in 5 people so if you dated more than 5 people you have already

strateguy632 · Answer

it would be case by case. i would meet them and see.

JacobJordan · Answer

Considering nearly everyone has some form of mental disorder I should hope people can find a way to make it work

DextroShade · Answer

It depends on which one it is. Acceptable: depression, anxiety, ADHD, mild autism  Unacceptable: bipolar, narcissism, BPD, schizophrenia, psychopathy, OCD

Miristheiss · Answer

It would depend.  Probably not, not unless it was a mild case of whatever it was.

fantasticass · Answer

Yes... they are creative people who think "outside the box ".

butterly248 · Answer

My partner has extremely bad depression and adhd. I myself have depression, anxiety etc. We both love each other ❤️

Would you be able to date someone with a mental illness/disorder?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Would you be able to date someone with a mental illness/disorder?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.