Anyone had or has a long term relationship after meeting on tinder?

[Crimsyjo]

People say Tinder is just a hook up site. But I've also heard it has the highest success rate for relationships too. So which is it? Can genuine couples find eachother on there? Give me some hope please!

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

With Tinder, this is my report in my close surroundings, five scenarios, all happening in France, for the record.

• 28yo. Handsome guy using strategic communication (a real car seller!) jumping from one bed to another to compensate for a breakup, I'm not sure it helps for the breakup, but at least he gets a lot of superficial validation, he's drowning in that even, and that's his goal, he's honest about it.
• 37yo. Standard guy thinking he's handsome, with difficulties (and reluctance) to understand girls, tediously getting 2 lines of convo in 2 years, this one is really hating the online dating scene, yet he keeps hoping. In vain, but don't tell him, he doesn't like to talk about that.
• 32yo. Standard guy using strategical thinking, he's getting a few encounters, but he's totally clumsy, and relatively clueless, in anything emotion, it generally ends pretty quickly. However he has more success, in person, to find long term relations.
• 41yo. Handsome woman, rather nonstrategic and spontaneous, clueless about dating, and critiquing (accurately) the concept, meets a few guys to talk with, but finds no spark anywhere to relate to. We're not even sure she's ready for a relationship, and she has no taste for random encounters anyway.
• 43yo. Standard guy tried to feed AI pictures to Tinder during profile creation. Failed, Tinder detected all my forged imagery attempts. Tinder seems clever. I abandoned the mission.

[Crimsyjo]

Hahaha. Are any of those genuine?
Actually the AI picture thing is stupid. It's easy to verify then change your pictures to fakes. I encountered a few AI and catfish when I first joined.
Poor 37 year old... dammit... I'm always drawn to the underdogs and guys needing fixing!!!

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

All are genuine.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Ah, I didn't consider using the real pic and then switch to AI, it would have broke my personal rules anyway

[Crimsyjo]

Nooo nit all. Defo not last one lol. Unless was experimental. In which case totally believe it.

[Crimsyjo]

Oh my. You surprise me not thinking of that. I wanted to figure out how the catfish did it.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Ofc it was experimental, if I have to engage with Tinder at least I should have fun, cause online dating ain't fun at all lol

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

well, okay, it was fun trying to maintain a tinder convo initiated by a friend of mine with his account. It will be our secret though, shhhhh.

[Crimsyjo]

Omg I didn't know you were so devious LOL

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Oh well, Tinder convos are easy, some turn of phrases, a bunch of adequate emojis, and people feel soooo comfy with just this. People don't even bother trying to scratch the surface... because it's not the purpose of Tinder anyway. The surface is the purpose hehe

[shades777]

It's definitely not made for men, someone did a study on tinder and found women get more matches by design because they want men to spend money on the app.

Those are the facts jack! re-state//background_color_rgba (0, 0, 0, 0), font_color_rgb (77, 77, 77), justifyLeft

[Crimsyjo]

Sounds about right!! It is a fact there are more men on there too. And I think true women get way more matches. Or at least would if she matched to lots of guys.

I think men match to all the women to see how many come back. Then will read the bio and decide if to keep the match or not. Whereas women are careful and read the bio and choose before swiping. Because otherwise will get 100's of unsuitable matches.

I had one woman tell me she got zero matches on tinder. Maybe she was too picky and the few she selected didn't match back?

But anyways... it's not looking good from overall results here that it "works" for relationships

[shades777]

Ah better to just swipe right on everyone and talk to those you like out of those matches. Nobody got time to read each and every one. Half the time the bios are the same.

I'm a foodie, travel, oh did I mention I'm a foodie, good lord free wheely lol had enough to eat yet?

[Crimsyjo]

Haha but then it's also said men are less picky (or more attracted to?) A larger variety of women. Because you saying you haven't time to read the bios mean there are a lot of women you find enough attraction in to swipe right on?
Not so for me. In my age range. I will be nope nope nope nope oh wait (read bio) nope. Lol

[shades777]

It's not about that, it's about getting the match first and also I'm interested in what women find me attractive in the first place, I can read the bios of the ones I match with, doing it before hand is a tremendous waste of time

[shades777]

If a man wants better results he's got to cast a bigger net, it's purely a numbers game in a dating app environment. In real life I only "introduce" myself, I don't chase any woman. I continuously improve myself for myself

[Crimsyjo]

Yes!! I know it is. I've used thos analogy before.
For men on apparently they cast a big net, see what comes in, and toss away the small or wrong catch.

For women.. we do it more like hunters. We don't go into the Sahara and shoot ALL the big animals then look at what we got. We target very specifically. If we want a lion we will look for only the lions.

Therefore if a woman matches with you she has "chosen".
Which is also why I think men complain women don't make the first move. Well we did. Our choosing you says we see enough potential. Now you need to "check your catch" and show you have chosen back by messaging. Because we know you didn't "choose" us just on matching.

However for those that wonder why they message and don't get a response... we may have shot three or four lions. So if your not quick enough another lion might have our attention.
Most of us if we are serious don't like trying to build a connection or do small talk with lots of guys. You can't spread yourself thin, remember the details, and expect a connection to grow.

[shades777]

Hmm that's a interesting perspective, I had a woman message me saying my eyes caught her, never really thought of my eyes being an object of attention. I would have thought my muscles would be a bigger attractor.

[Crimsyjo]

I heard the advice if you want to comment t with someone who is open emotionally look at the eyes. The guy I feel crazy bonded with, his eyes in his profile pic were (are) so intense. Eyes definitely matter!

[shades777]

No wonder women would comment on my eyes, pardon me but it creeps me out

[Apple1996]

Not tinder but my brother did meet his wife om eharmony

[HawkPerception]

I actually learned only during my brother's engagement party during his speech that he found his partner on Tinder. My mom also found her boyfriend of like 15 years on a dating app.

They can definitely work, but you need to filter well and look for the right traits in a person as well as the red flags.

[Woyboy]

Probably could if your in to each other probably mostly a bang site

[Woyboy]

Are you on tinder?

[Crimsyjo]

Yeah I am. Sometimes badoo. I've tried others but those two are 'best'. But none seem good for relationship men.

[Woyboy]

Can I massage you

[Crimsyjo]

Sure

[ComingRightHere]

Well i had experience on it but it was just you know, not a long term.

May i ask you a question in private? But i can't pm cause im xper1

[slatyb]

I know a married couple that met on Tinder. My wife and I met on match.

[Crimsyjo]

That's good news!! Tho I think it's changed a lot in recent years.

[Crimsyjo]

Or maybe people have...

[Lynx122]

Yes I've met all of my 15 gfs on Tinder ;)

[Crimsyjo]

15? Actually girlfriends not FBs? Lol

[Lynx122]

I was just kidding :P I don't actually use tinder

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

This moment when crimsy bites the bait way too easily 😏

[Crimsyjo]

@Maybe_Maybe_not well I thought the joke was calling FBs girlfriends. In which case... I have a lot of boyfriends.

[HelpfulWoman]

Match for me but 7/8 years on now.

[NathanDavis]

I've never used online dating stuff

[Someone122333]

It can happen but i think it's rare

[Jennz6]

Nope

[MasterKS]

another rumour! LOL!