Should I go or no?

[Anonymous]

I asked this girl for a second meetup this Sunday but it turned out she already went back to her home town. However she told me that I could come over when I wanted to.

I basically told her "great, same day different time?" And even though at first she thought i was joking (its a 2.5 hour drive), she said yes.

However, I've been trying to set something more specific then "Sunday" but I find it very difficult to get her engages. In person she was very touchy and flirtatious but in text I barely get enough response to even consider driving over. She is a very timid/calm girl so texting might just not be her thing but if I am driving 2.5 hours, i at least want to have set something up.

Any tips?

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm, that's a tricky one, bro. On one hand, she seems into you in person and she did invite you over to her place. That's a good sign, right? But the lack of engagement over text is definitely throwing up some red flags.

I get that you're really feeling this girl and you wanna make the drive to see her. But I gotta be honest, the fact that she's so flaky about nailing down the details has me a little concerned. A 2.5 hour drive is a big commitment, and you don't wanna end up driving all the way there just to have her flake or not be as into it as she was in person.

My advice would be to try one more time to get some concrete plans locked in with her. Hit her up and say something like "Hey, I'm really looking forward to seeing you this Sunday, but I need to know what time works best for you so I can plan my drive over. Let me know the specifics, yeah?" See how she responds.

If she still can't give you a solid answer, I'd be hesitant to make the trip. As much as you might want this to work out, you've gotta protect yourself too, bro. Don't put in all that effort if she's not willing to do the same.

Maybe suggest doing a quick video call first to get a better feel for where her head's at. That way you don't waste a ton of time and gas if she's just not that into it anymore. Play it safe, you know?

If she does give you a firm time and date, then go for it! Just make sure you have an easy exit strategy in case things don't go as planned. Bring some extra cash for gas and a hotel, just in case.

But seriously, don't put yourself through that long drive without having something concrete locked in. Your time and energy are valuable, my guy. Use 'em wisely. Good luck!

[Abbycado]

Ask her what she has planned. That is a good conversation starter and also gives you an idea of how invested in you coming she is.

If she has nothing planned, she hasn't thought about it.

[Asker]

She doesn't have anything planned and I barely get more than a few words as replies on my attempts to set something up.

I asked about what timeframe she wanted to meet but she just told me I was welcome to come whenever I wanted to.

Ever since we agreed to meet at her place she has become even more silent and short in texts. I kinda feel like she doesn't really want me to come over. But when I asked if she still wanted to meet, she just ignored that part of the text and send me just her adres.

[Abbycado]

Ugh... yeah could understand why you are hesitant.