Girls have guys in their dms, single mums want you to take care of the kids they shouldn't have had, loyalty is rare, so Is dating nowadays realistic?

[Anonymous]

In modern dating I find girls are more likely to cheat as they always have guys in their dms and are never truly lonely, as for most guys dating apps are a ghost town where as girls are bombarded with likes, if I was to try to meet someone new id actively have to message 100 girls in order to get 1 response back, also when it comes to dating sites girls tend to only swipe yes on the same 4% of guys meaning most guys get no matches and the guys that do, get a lot of options hence why a lot of girls seems to think all guys are cheats, they all chose the same type of guy so no wonder..

I wouldn't say I'm bad looking as I've done the odd bit of model work and TV and film stuff as an extra, but yeah I find most dating apps will secretly disable your account if you are a paying customer as they want to keep you single for more profit for future gold memberships,

Most girls in there 30s seems to already have kids and hate their baby daddies, and can't fathom why a guy who doesn't have kids wouldn't want a single mother lol

Id like my own family one day but I'd really have to feel like it's the right person in order to bring a life into the world, where as most girls will have kids with anyone at a young age. Wasted..

I'm 37 but starting to think I'm getting too old to be a dad as finding a girl without kids is hard, there have been times when a girl like in her early 20s with no baggage would want a relationship but for me that's morally wrong.

Avoidants attachments are definitely narcissistic and run from a relationship where as an anxious will fight for a relationship

I've tried speed dating and again all single mothers and divorcees.

Loyalty seems really rare nowadays and people don't realise that relationship can get boring and can be very difficult but finding someone who's willing to work on relationship repair is hard

Even after sex repair is important which many don't seem to even know is a thing h

Have standards for settling will only make you cheat

Updates

1 y

Woah what a crazy response but some nice msgs, I haven't played the field and used anyone, no I'm not big headed just meant I think I'm ok, anyone can look good with effort, that's not a bad thing, and meh I always wanted to have my own family, In the past I've always been with females avoidants, I finally found a beautiful 29 yr old who wants the same things out of life that I do, my advice don't settle for less don't create kids till you're both 100% sure

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude, I feel you on how tough the dating scene can be these days. It's like a minefield out there, especially with all the social media and dating apps making it so easy for girls to get attention from a ton of guys. The whole situation with single moms and guys just wanting to hook up can make it super frustrating.

You're right, it's hard to find true loyalty and commitment these days. A lot of people just seem to bounce from one relationship to the next without putting in the work. And the whole dynamic of certain guys getting way more matches and options on the apps, while most dudes struggle, definitely creates some messed up dynamics.

I get why you might feel jaded or like dating is just not realistic anymore. When you see all the cheating and games, it's enough to make a guy just wanna give up. And as you get older, that pressure to find the right person and start a family can feel even harder.

But don't lose hope, man. There are still good, loyal girls out there who aren't just looking to play the field or settle for the first person who comes along. You just gotta keep putting yourself out there, stay true to your values, and try not to get too cynical. The right girl will come along when the time is right.

In the meantime, focus on yourself, stay confident, and don't compromise your standards just to avoid being alone. It's better to wait for the right connection than to settle for something that's not gonna last. Hang in there, dude. The dating game is tough, but you got this.

[Summeroflove]

It comes down to integrity and opportunity a woman whose a genuinely good person as well as a man who is isn’t going to cheat. Even when tempted by the right person, at the right place, at the right time, and knowing they wouldn’t get caught they wouldn’t follow through.

The same is true for men who get a lot of female attention such as men with money, men who are military, first responders, etc. Some cheat because the opportunity is there. The same as women who have beauty get a lot of male attention.

Both sexes have sexual urges. Women on average tend to be a lot more planned out. They are more careful they seem to plan cheating/affairs out as well as cover their tracks. Men are more impulsive… But there are exceptions there is men who are careful and women who are impulsive.

[Apple1996]

You waited to long to find a woman now all your gonna get is leftovers who didn't marry off. Your acting like you don't like single moms/women who have divorced but they are looking at you the same way like you have baggage from being older and not in a relationship yet

[Avicenna]

His baggage is nothing compared to a single mom with kids in tow- she almost always has issues beyond having someone else's kids.

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna having kids is not baggage. Being single for how many years or possible failed relationships is HUGE baggage. If her kids maybe show a lot of failed relationships like 10 babies or something then sure they're equal but if not he's the bigger problem

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna especially at 37 years old. He has basically 20 years to find a partner

[Avicenna]

LOL, Apple, that is the biggest BS you've ever posted, which is saying a lot.
Sure, once he hits 58, he's not allowed to date anymore- it's Apple's Law... seriously?

And while there are things other than having kids that count as baggae, a woman having children still living at home is a total dealbreaker.

Failed relationships are the norm. Why they failed may be baggage, but few people have no failed relationships. Not having one at all by a certain age could be an issue, depending on why. But I'd take a chance on a woman who's never had one before dating a single mom.

[Avicenna]

But we see the misandrist bias you always display in your answers.

Incidentally, it's very easy for a guy in his 50s to find a partner.

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna i didn't say that at all. I'm saying he's complaining about his current dating pool acting like he doesn't also have baggage. There's a reason why he's also leftover. Those women who are single moms/divorced were out living their lives the past 20 years like that was he doing? You know lol

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna im sure middle aged men are soo desirable lol I'd love to be that delusional 😂

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna I seen this with some of my brothers. They fucked over their youth relationship wise by wanting to travel and get a career then had to settle for women who are disabled or have mental issues even tho in their youth their girlfriends were much better options even in the long run

[Avicenna]

Your delusions are thinking that women in their 50s and 60s are dating men in their 20s or that being a single mom is comparable with a guy having no dating experience (neither is the best option out there, but she is a much worse bet).

Being in my 50s, I am qualified to comment on the possibilities for a guy that age who's taken care of himself. Plenty of women our age or a bit younger who are interested- IU'm not talking about men that age and women in their 20s.

Well, sure there are more options who don't have baggage when a guy is younger, but a giy doesn't have to date a single mom.

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna yeah right dude keep living in delusion land. I've seen over and over again middle aged men have shit relationships or can't find a woman to date in general. They don't have it easy

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna men who are single at that age are usually the ones out there paying for pussy. Shit just even paying for nudes and OF as well. The majority aren't finding dating easy

[Avicenna]

That might be what you see in your everyday life, but I don't have any trouble finding women to date. Now, I'm not suggesting they're models or anything like that, but women outnumber men at my age. and I've taken good care of myself.

You can have shit relationships at any age. And adjusting expectations somewhat helps, as well as staying away from messed up people.

[Avicenna]

by the way, if you say dating is lousy for middle-aged men, you're implictly saying that middle-aged women are terrible to date.

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna a lot of the middle aged women I've heard don't acutally like relationships anymore by that age. They'll go after young guys for sex but not want to date any age of man at all. So sure that's probably true that they're terrible to date

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna you also keep saying you look great for your age. You should send a pic or post on how do I look cuz now I'm curious 🤔

[Avicenna]

LOL, I said I've take care of myself (meaning I'm in good shape).

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna ah so your in good shape but ugly? Lol

[Avicenna]

LMAO, I didn't say that- you did! Since when do ugly guys have no trouble getting women?

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna some ugly guys are hot. It's acutally a thing women are into 😂 Pete Davison and mgk are two famous examples of ugly but hot men

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna still you should post sometime

[Avicenna]

LOL, Apple, does your husband fall for this type of manipulation?

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna oh I think you'd be shocked at how my hubby acts. He's 10x worse than how I act here on GaG if you could imagine 😂

[Avicenna]

Whoa...

[Apple1996]

@Avicenna yeah I'm the calm one in my relationship

[Asker]

I didn't wait? Lol

[Apple1996]

Did you try dating before? I will say your question was lacking a lot of info about yourself. It seemed more like you were complaining

[Asker]

I wasn't complaining, yeah I've had relationships before, but an avoidant attachment style isn't someone id feel secure enough to start a family with, I've been told to write a book on the dates I've had, but yeah I think everyone is allowed a personal preference, not everyone will like someone's preferences and that's ok there will be someone that will :)

[Anonymous]

Oh you're a model who's forever single and needing data apps. Riiiiiiiight lol.

[Opinion Owner]

Dating*

[Asker]

I'm taken sorry

[Avicenna]

You're being too picky when it comes to a woman's age. If a childless woman in her 20s will date you, have at it. Do avoid the single moms, though. Almost all of them have baggage and issues far beyond their kid (s).

[Anonymous]

My advice to guys is this. Put in work trying find your match up to age 25. After that take your time. Because generally all the women worth marrying are married by 25.

[Anonymous]

Lay off the drugs, kiddo.

[Asker]

You too