Poor people who have dated rich people, what did you learn?

[Anonymous]

[OneViewpoint]

I was raised lower middle class and spent most of my adult life solidly middle class. I only gained wealth and started hanging around wealthy people as an adult in my 40's.

I never dated anyone wealthy for a couple of reasons...

• For most of my life I was never around wealthy people. So the odds of dating one were essentially zero.
• When I was exposed to wealthy people it was immediately apparent that they can be some of the most fucked up personalities I've ever seen.
• I've seen other people date across the lines of economic status and it didn't look like a fairytale.

What I've seen from a lot of wealthy people is...

• Gluttonous self indulgence with drugs, alcohol, sex, money.
• Selfishness.
• A sense of entitlement.
• Massive insecurities.
• Trust issues.
• Low work ethic.
• Inability to cope with even simple problems in life.

I decided pretty quickly that on the whole, I don't want to be those people and I don't want to hang out with those people. I limit my exposure to them to professional relationships and the sort of mandatory socializing that comes from working together.

Here's a couple of examples of my experiences observing the rich and famous...

• When I was in private equity I attended a colleague's Christmas Party at his home. His trophy wife spent most of dinner with her shoes off and her foot in my crotch under the table. When I went to leave she came with me to get my coat and threw her arms around my neck and let me know in slightly slurred speech she wanted me to fuck her. Umm, yeah, I'll get right on that... gotta go, bye. Can you say awkward boys and girls?
• A friend of mine who worked in construction somehow started dating a trust fund baby from a wealthy family. They were both divorced and in their 40's. She turned out to be a coke head. He got hooked on coke from hanging out with her and her friends. They got married but her family made sure he signed a 40 page pre-nup agreement before the wedding. It was an alcohol and coke filled emotional rollercoaster. He eventually developed self esteem issues. He was bought out per the pre-nup and went on his way with a bag of money and alcohol and drug problems. She ran her business that she treated like a hobby into the ground and the family cleaned up her mess so she could do it all over again. Quick show of hands... who wants to sign up for that?

[ManOnFire]

This is gold. I know exactly everything you're talking about. I have attained somewhat of a higher financial status in my life as well and I've been exposed to others who are wealthy and grew up wealthy, and they are some of the worst people you will ever meet. Drug use does also seem to be a big thing with them, yes. And getting drunk.

They've got all that money and privilege but are some of the emptiest, saddest, and often even the cruelest people out there.

[live2dance25]

Totally agree. And some of them have such good lawyers, they could probably get away with murder. I dated one that caused property damage when high and drunk, landed in someone’s front yard, on a busy street in town with lots of witnesses, and got all the charges dropped due to a good lawyer. Didn’t even get a ticket which most of us would get if we drove through a fence after 20+ shots and so drunk the hospital needed to hook up tubes to her. Yeah, it’s crazy how money can get you out of jail.

[madhatters4]

i was far from poor my family was economically speaking upper middle class but my parents definitely raised us as if we were in the middle class or slightly lower... which was annoying as a kid but as an adult i appreciate they taught us to live beneath our means

in college this girl from a wealthy family was into me. we dated briefly but stayed close friends, even til this day. i don't really know that i learned a lot. she was very cool and down to earth. she had access to lots of money but didn't seem to act like money necessarily changed who she was. it was nice being able to go out to bars and put stuff on 'Ms. Cronin's' card or be able to go out to restaurants, when most college kids couldn't afford it. but honestly the girl herself was a completely down to earth, cool, fun person.

so i guess i learned that for some money doesn't make them. having money was only a means to enjoy parts of life but didn't define her

[MissSunshine2]

That rich people worry more about saving money and people only wanting them or liking them for their wealth. Poorer people care more about preserving their community (with exceptions). They worry about other people not liking them full stop.

Besides that, the obvious thing being that the rich have more and nicer things, we're pretty much all the same. Once a lot of rich people realise you like them for them and not their money, they can be as good a friend as anyone else can. The ones you'd have labelled snobby, give them patience and kindness and they'll relax around your other friends.

[Anonymous]

rich people usually don't date poor people. so you'd be in for a hard time finding such a couple.

poor people usually lack connections and education

rich people usually have a lot more knowledge and connections and are usually smarter and more wise about how they spend their time

[ManOnFire]

I grew up poor, but am no longer that. I have never dated someone rich, and in fact I have always vowed to never do that. Because I know what they are and what they lack, and I don't want to really be connected to them like that. There are some wealthy people I know right now who want so much to be friends with me and I keep them at a distance on purpose because I know what they are and I am not comfortable with their lifestyles.

[MikeMcMansion]

The values you seem to want in a woman would only come from an upper middle-class family these days that’s also religious. Speaking only of the Statistical-probabilities of course

[ManOnFire]

@MikeMcMansion Maybe. But she doesn't necessarily need to be upper middle-class to have those values. A woman of faith is very important.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I learned a great deal about how to handle money, finances, investing and be responsible…

[live2dance25]

They have been decent people, but haven’t gone through the difficulties that typically require survival skills or manual labor. I am currently remodeling my kitchen, I cut plywood on the weekends and do what I can when I’m not working. One of the women I dated would complain “that takes too long” and would just use inheritance money to hire the work out. Same with vehicle repairs, I would do simple repairs like brakes, shocks, etc. in my driveway and the same thing, “that takes too long” and “why don’t you just take it to Meineke/Midas/whatever and put it on a credit card”. Just a different way of thinking and when there’s anything that requires actual physical labor or tedious work, they’ve not understood why many of us do these things. Because we simply at one point in our lives could not afford to do it another way.

[Rangers]

That rich people aren't what they seem. They were kind, polite, thrifty and non-judgemental, except for her mom, of course, who was outright racist.

It does make sense, why would nasty people get rich? Nobody wants to work with a nasty person, even if they're good at their jobs. I never asked her for financial help and never got any help, so don't say I tried to flip the gold digger script.

It was her father that's the rich one, not her, anyway. But a rich family is close enough, I suppose

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I don't think rich people are all that different from poor people they're just as ignorant, empathetic and stubborn as anyone else.

I think a lot of people mix up rich and middle class not realizing how poor they actually are. The middle class are usually the super stuck up ones

[MikeMcMansion]

Wealthy people usually don’t flaunt their wealth. Generational wealth is on a different level. Their wealth is usually kept in the form of hard assets/investments. Land, valuable properties, gold, businesses, trusts, etc. They play favorites with their kids and it often breaks up families.

[Anonymous]

i've meet some rich girls here during the summer , wouldn't say they were that much different than the other girls just that they had more money and went on a lot of trips outside the country.

[realbiggrin]

Seems poor people will shell out to help others a lot faster if at all.

[exitseven]

They really are different from the rest of us, They do not have the everyday worries about finances but do not appreciate what they have,

[Jeff51]

Doubt many rich people would date a poor person but maybe some. I would like to know too

[RingOfFire]

I grew up in a wealthy family and also have been financially successful myself. When I was young I only dated girls from my childhood community so they were all from wealthy families. Later, after I moved away and went to college I met some girls from not very wealthy families and loved the idea of dating them. There was an attitude difference that I found appealing. The love of my life came from a poor family.

[RingOfFire]

I knew someone named Geoff when I was in high school.

[Jeff51]

@RingOfFire from school?

[RingOfFire]

Yes, he was in my older sister's class.

[qwerty2469]

Rich girls love getting fucked up the ass by poor people their daddy's hate. Rich black girls love race play.

[ruhijuise]

really