Should I date my brother’s friend even though he disapproves?

[Anonymous]

I've recently decided I want to get into biking but I didn't really know anyone who biked nor do I have any friends who'd want to try it out with me so when I got talking to my older brother about it he told me a really good friend of his is really into biking and he'd ask him to help me get started.

I was a little scared at first so my brothers friend said i should ride on the back of his bike to begin with just to see what its like and for fun.

My brother is very protective of me especially around other men and because of this my dating life hasn't been great because he scares them off if he doesn't think there good enough for me. My family have very christian, conservative views and dont really want me going around with guys unless marriage is on the cards which I find stupid, im a grown woman not a little girl.

So he really didn't like the idea of me getting on the back of a bike with some guy he's known for years but I insisted and really put my foot down with him.

My brother told him he could take me out for an half an hour around the block and he'd be waiting back for us 🙄. As soon as I saw his friend I couldn't stop nervously laughing because I found him super hot.

Long story short we really hit it off and my brothers friend ignored his wishes and he took me out for 3 hours instead and we stopped to get something to eat together. My brother is a big guy and can come off scary to a lot of guys but the people who know him, knows he's a big kitty cat deep down so his friend thought it was funny to wind him up by taking me out longer than he said and taking me for something to eat.

When we went out for dinner we couldn't stop flirting and it was almost like love at first sight he said. Usually im really nervous and won't amit to liking a guy but we both just knew as soon as are eyes but my brother is really pissed at him because he didn't do as he told him that time.

[Anonymous]

You have every right to date his friend. But what your both overlooking something important, respect and trust. Yes your brother is being overly controlling. He should be dictating who you date. Regardless of religious beliefs or protective instincts that does not give him authority over your relationships.
To me it’s a lack of respect on his friends side as well as trust. His friend agreed to 30 minutes which he extended. That tells me he doesn’t respect your brother. You seem to be enjoying the fact that the two men are challenging each other, rather than understanding how this could affect their friendship. Let’s say his friend cheated on you or something that put a wedge between your brother and his friend, now it’s putting his friendship at risk. Would you be upset at your brother for still being friends w his friend if his friend cheated on you? So it could end up costing him two relationships, his friend as well as his sister.
I’ve had a lot of friends in the military who I would trust my life w. But at the same time I sen how they treated women which is not what I’d want for my sister. But at the same time if your really feels this way, then he should explain why rather than just saying no in hopes that you’ll understand more where he’s coming from. I think you need to seriously consider your brother’s feelings, especially if this friendship is really important to him. The friend needs to understand how he’s feel if things were reversed. The friend deliberately antagonized your brother by extending the 30 minutes. As the brother is really consider my friendship w this man. He completely disrespected him. It should also make you question his actions in regards to your brother.

[Anonymous]

My sister was in a similar situation. She started dating her friends brother and she wasn't happy about it. They now have two kids together and are getting married soon. Her friend got over it. If you really like the guy for for it.

[Melody90]

It depends on why your brother disapproves. If he has genuine concerns about his friend's character or intentions, it's worth listening to him. But if he's simply being overprotective, you have the right to make your own decisions. You're the one who would be dating this person, not your brother. Just make sure you know the guy well and that he treats you with respect.

[Asker]

He was a ture gentleman the whole time we were out and treated me really well, made sure I was safe on the back of him and paid for dinner.

My brother doesn't have any reason to disapprove. When I asked why he just said stupid stuff and I think its more his ego being hurt because his friend stood up to him and did want he wanted not what he told him to do.

I know guys talk about women to each other and I think thats another reason he doesn't like it. Because know if women ever get bought up he knows he's referring to his little stister

[LotharioENERZY]

your life your choice, brother have nothing to do with it.

[Iron_Man]

Nope