Do guys date girls who don't sleep around?

[Anonymous]

I have only had one sex partner and from the looks of it now a days guys like a girl who has had a lot of sex partners but I am not the type of girl to sleep around. What do guys think?

[MrOracle]

"Do guys date girls who don't sleep around?"

It depends on which guys we are talking about.

The Top-Tier guys (the top 5%, who are the most attractive, confident, and popular) will sleep with the hottest girls they can get that will still give up sex quickly and easily, and since the guy is so popular and attractive, that means most hot girls are available to him. If you aren't super-hot AND willing to give them easy sex, you won't get these guys.

The Mid-Tier guys are typically between a 5 to a 9 in looks, not usually as popular or confident as the Top-Tier guys, and are what most girls consider "average." Most of these guys WANT to be Top-Tier guys, and strive to be them. Around college-age in particular, most aren't looking for a relationship, and just want to be free. They DO want sex, so they will have ONS or FWB, but most don't want a real relationship at that stage in their life. They're in Party Mode. Maybe 10-15% of this group is an exception, meaning they DO want a real relationship. You *may* be able to get one of these, but you'll have lots of competition for these guys.

The Bottom-Tier guys run from a one to a 7-8 in looks, but they lack confidence in general, and with women specifically, and many have social development issues. These guys are mostly invisible to girls (think "Raj" on The Big Bang Theory) or annoy the crap out of them (think "Howard Wolowitz"). In this group are a few "Leonards", meaning genuinely great guys who are just a little shy and lack some confidence, but who can be great boyfriends if given a chance. These "Leonards" are at the top of this tier, and can also be a great choice for a girl your age looking for a real relationship.

Virtually all guys want sex, and few guys are interested in a sexless relationship, but you need to realize that a lot of guys have ZERO interest in a relationship, and that these "no relationship" guys tend to populate the higher levels of attractiveness, which is where most girls "shop" for a boyfriend, and that's why so many girls are frustrated and/or give in and just start sleeping around.

If you want a guy to be with you as you are, then you need to "shop" in the Mid and Bottom Tiers, or you need to date older guys (late 20s to 30s), who are past their Party Mode stage and are ready for a serious relationship. If you keep going after the "no relationship" guys, then you are destined to fail again and again.

[Asker]

I like older guys actually since I am 24 I will date someone as old as 37 I've figured. I love Leonard I wish I could find a guy like him. The biggest problem I am having is that a long time ago even the hottest guys had to get girlfriends even if they wanted just sex but now girls give it away like nothing so guys don't need to have girlfriends. This leaves nothing for me the girl that won't sleep around that wants to find a great guy.

[ryanontario]

guys would date you , many would prefer a girl who doesn't sleep around when there say looking for an actual girlfriend .

yeah if there looking for a bar or party hook up they are going to avoid you like the plague but the ones looking for something serious will be interested and glad you haven't been with a bunch of other dudes

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Every person has a type people just date who is convenient at the time. In fact a lot of people, male and female sleep around for maybe a period in their life but it doesn't really define who they are as a person because they may be a really down to earth person. Everyone sleeps around in college and that's fine because sometimes people don't want a serious relationship just for that period of their life. But since your age is around 18-24 I'm going to assume you are probably in college , yeah most college kids don't want anything serious. Especially the men in that age range they typically love the bachelor lifestyle , yeah the bachelor lifestyle with a nice apartment that has a nice collection of alcohol, a big flat screen TV with video games and freedom . ( this doesn't refer to sleeping around but like Man freedom which you won't get unless you hang out enough with men)

[Asker]

Don't say everyone I went to college for 6 years to finish my masters and did not sleep around one bit. I graduated already.

[Anon1999]

I agree with you, I went to college as well and never slept around either. Young is not an excuse to sleep around.

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

you two are an exception everyone in my college had a f*** budy by the first week of the first semester my freshman year and its a private school !

[Asker]

Everyone in your college you are still young honey you can't say everyone. People do sleep around in college but not everyone some people have morals. Its a private school lol That's has nothing to do with it I just have morals thanks!

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

Yeah I know one of my friends in his 20's is still a virgin , but its like that in most schools in case you haven't noticed. Like my friend visited a Frat house at another college and he met a boy he saw in one of those hazing p*rno vids. And to get in to one of the fraternities in my college the boys have to film a girl giving him a blow job. It is like this in a lot of school's because the majority of college kids don't have morals

[Asker]

So because they are in college this makes it ok?

[Hyped_up_on_coffee]

It isn't a point of whether it's okay or not people just do things because they are away from home and it just happens. You really should stop questioning other people's morality and try to find someone who is more like you to date

[XRabbitHeartX]

Yes. All my guy friends who I've talked to about this admit they'd prefer a serious girlfriend who is a virgin or a girl who has only a few sex partners in comparison to a girl who's slept around with many guys. They see the girls who sleep around as good time girls but not really as more than that. So yes, some girls who have sex with lots of dudes will get more attention sometimes from guys but not because they want to date them or actually have a serious relationship with them but because they want a good time physically with the girl for a brief period of time before going onto the next. I'd much rather want a guy who is interested in a serious girlfriend than just a good time any way so be patient and wait for the right guy cause the right guy will like the fact that you haven't been around.

[renogaza]

everyone except MikeK are awesome guys, +1 to all of you, I agree that all these things get screwed up by immature people, sadly so many are affected by them and it often can't be fixed anymore, the regret is already there for them.. in this aspect I'm really lucky I didn't do anything stupid back when most guys my age were immature, and now I have a really great guy to be with :3

ahh to live without guilt or regret~

as for dDizzie not sure, I think he just doesn't care, but that in itself is bad imo

[Asker]

MikeK I can take its that Stitches up there who only wants sex from a girl and seems to think its there job to give it too him.

[renogaza]

well actually, I answered early, so now my previous statement is invalid, so yeah.. ill make another summary when this thread slows down :)

stitches, can just go die in the jaws of an eotena, pigs like him don't deserve to exist.

[mortdiggiddy]

I have guy friends that have been with 5 women their whole life. I have guy friends that have been with 100+ women. At the end of the day there is a double standard when it comes to what most men view as a compatible partner in life. Most men I feel still want the good girl at the end of the day. They instinctively know that they have a better chance at having a success and happy marriage/family with the woman that saved more for for one person. It's terrible I know, but in my opinion, accurate. Guys, way more than girls, have a hard time thinking about their girl with many dudes. Guys are visual, and think visual. Women are emotional, and think emotional. Ask any guy what he gets jealous over and it's the sexual history of a woman. Ask any girl what she gets jealous over, and it's usually the romantic level of the relationship histories. Guys can prowl around much more indiscriminately than girls. It's accepted more socially that guys behave this way. I've actually had some women admit that they have no desire to be with a virgin man, even if he was gorgeous and successful. The concept of a virgin man that is successful and attractive is an oxymoron in today's society, it just doesn't happen. And if the anomaly was actually witnessed, there must be something wrong with that dude, right? This is strange, because the majority of men I feel would have no problem dating a virgin woman, who is clearly a virgin by her own choice (physically attractive, educated, and more). At the end of the days at men still want the good girl, they are clearly aware of the girls on the wife ladder, girlfriend ladder, and hookup ladder. Each girl a guy meets is placed in one of these categories, all guys do it.

Meet a guy that wants to respect you and values the sacrifices you have made. Meet someone that honors personal choices like the ones you have made.

[Anonymous]

Guys say they want a girl with morals and a good girl. But I think that is more marriage material, most guys want slutty girls that will give them everything and ask for nothing in return dating today is like prostitution except with out money. So it's worse.

[Asker]

I am glad you see that you put it right.

[Opinion Owner]

Thanks it's just the truth dating is just scary with the amount of stuff guys feel entitled to...

[Asker]

This is the truth.

[Opinion Owner]

NOW I FEEL ENTITLED TO BA! lol jk it's my guy impression haha. I think we all need to rewrite the script the good girls because I don't know what I'm going to do either I don't wanna be 50 and finally settle down.

[Asker]

I don't think I will ever settle down at this rate cause guys I find only like sluts.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah it's sad, but they won't end up with girls like that so we have to look for the guys that are older or at last mature and understated. I mean went you want a rental it doesn't need to be a porsha, those you save up for. It may be a poor comparison but girls like us are the Porshas and Bentleys of the game, when a guy is serious and actually wants to settle down he isn't going to want a slut.

[Anonymous]

That is the only women I will date. If you sleep around you won't be on a date with me. Sadly girls like you are becoming harder and harder to find. Guys want girls for sex but the women like you are the ones that they want to marry when they mature up. Stick with your instincts not to sleep around there is a guy out there looking for exactly what you offer.

[jdsomers]

agreed.

[Anonymous]

That's the only type of girl I would date.

The guys who like a girl who sleeps around are the guys who sleep around too.

[Asker]

Thanks :)

[Anonymous]

I have only had one sex partner too. It's harder to find someone special if you don't sleep around, but you will have more self-respect I think.

[Anonymous]

There're not nearly enough girls like you around these days. Immature punks may not go for girls who won't sleep with them after a date or two, but you're exactly what the good guys are looking for.

[DeanWillis]

personally, I prefer a girl with a similar number of partners to mine.

yes, guys date girls who don't sleep around. many guys prefer a girl like that.

my opinion: find a guy with similar number to yours.

[Asker]

That could be good advice the problem with that is that not many guys have only had one partner at 24. I don't know many girls who have only had one partner at 24.

[DeanWillis]

trust me there are people out there who haven't slept around much. some of these people are very good looking, some are decent looking. in other words, you can find someone who isn't on the bottom of the barrel.

[WoIIie]

She better be willing to sleep with me or else... hell no. Barring extremes, I don't let the past determine who you are now. I prefer a girl with a very small number, such as yourself. But if a girl happened to be with 6 guys (for example) that wouldn't change a thing. Maybe I'd be more wary as to how quickly I fall for her since she's likely to bolt, but I wouldn't see her as a slut.

[Asker]

I am not talking about girls with six guys but a girl with 20 plus partners. Around here six partners is still not much. If a guy was my boyfriend for a month or so I would gladly sleep with him as long as he treated me well and I felt conferable with him then ide have no problem with that.

[Anon1999]

Wow the mentality of she better be willing to sleep with me or else, way to clearly show what your motives are. To the Questioner a guy waiting a month is honestly not long enough guys can act a certain way for up to a year just to get in your pants. The man that doesn't say "she better be willing to sleep with me or else" isn't going to be the one that is going to treat you the way you want to be treated in the long run. It's just game to get what they want. Other guys know when they are gaming

[Anon1999]

It should say the man that doesn't say "she better be willing to sleep with me or else" IS going to be the one that is going to treat you the way you want to be treated in the long run. The one that says that isn't going to treat you well after you give them what they are looking for.

[Asker]

jk348 you are right he is not the type of guy ide ever want to be with anyway its not my job to give a guy sex.

[WoIIie]

You're making assumptions.

Why would I date a girl who doesn't want to f*** me? That's a disaster waiting to happen.

[Asker]

You don't get what I'm trying to say I love sex so I would have it with my boyfriend but not after the second date for me even tho I love sex there is more to dating then just sex. Sounds like that's the only thing you care about just like every other guy in this world :(

[WoIIie]

Obviously there is more to dating than sex.

That's not all I care about, but it's important. If a girl doesn't see me that way, it hurts. Especially if we stop dating and she decided to f*** another guy. Its like, I had my chance and missed it because I wasn't man enough for her.

[Asker]

I think it is important too actually but I don't want to give him sex before I even know if he likes me because I am then just setting myself up to get hurt. Sounds like you have been hurt in the past well so have I that's why I am co careful now.

[WoIIie]

It's not a matter of sex it's a matter of proper judgment. Good judgment consists of 10% analytics and 90% humility. Why so much humility you ask? Because we are unique individuals. You cannot allow past experiences (with other guys) determine who I am as a person. Most importantly, you can't allow your internal prejudices paint my character (like you just did)

Bad guys do exist, but you move on to the next one. Holding off sex from the cadence of love won't ever make a good guy turn bad.

[bDizzie]

I don't worry about numbers. What's in the past is in the past. So I would date either type.

[MikeK]

I would so long as she'd be willing to give it up eventually... I can be patient, but I have my needs to ya know?

[jacquesvol]

My wife was a virgin when we started at 20

[Anonymous]

Absolutely! Not many exist though.

[Asker]

I am one of the rare girls I guess.