Polls: Dating

So I don't know if he is interested but disorganized or uninterested or whatever but I can’t handle him apologizing to me once a week for who knows how long every time “ he can’t make it” 🤦🏻‍♀️

It’s the most stressful thing someone apologizing for something they have no need to apologize for but I’m told I have to accept it. anyhow it’s all so artificial and I just don’t like the assumption that just go onto him feeling sorry. What can I do that’s life 🤷🏻‍♀️

… and what if I meet another guy there and one day this guy shows up bc I did say ANY Thursday, I’ll be mortified. He will just think “ oh! I bet you I bring ALL THE BOYS to your fountain!!! Lol for real it’s just that’s my say off and I’m relaxed after I swim so it’s a nice time to get to know someone. 🤷🏻‍♀️ That’s all there is to it. It’s not a lair lol

I don’t want to say hey you nvm bc I did say any Thursday is ok at the sane time I do think there should be a tine limit. Maybe one month 🤔 lol I should’ve said the first Thursday of every month. That way I could have 4 guys a month without traffic jam 😅. I’m JOKING 🙃

I think to make it casual but unambiguous “this Thursday or next Thursday @ 8 pm”. That way we’d be done by now & no pressure is left. He could always ask me out after it’s no big deal. I definitely made it a bit too casual, it’s not good for anyone 😬

I will tell him I’m still ok with any Thursday but he seems overloaded (bc he keeps saying so) & just let me know if he wants to meet up On a Thursday. That way we are both free from the spectre of expectations 👻

When I asked initially, I wasn’t Interested in dating I just wanted to try hanging out so I couldn’t imagine complications, but I’m seeing how disruptive this plan is potentially.

To reiterate: I’m NOT asking how to make him like me or meet me or if he likes me or to get him to DO anything at all… I’m asking how to get out of this mess bc it’s stressful 🙏🏼

So some of you will recall a few weeks ago I asked a guy I know from campus library, if he wanted to meet up.

He said sure yeah, when?

I said meet me at 8 pm @ the fountain on a Thursday after I swim. ANY Thursday is fine bc I’m always there after I swim.

1. I wanted to leave it open Bc I didn’t want him to end up showing up at bad time. I know he’s really busy with grad school an work so his schedule is Unpredictable. I’ve been there and missed stuff on accident it’s stressful & feels horrible, I didn’t want a mess.

2. Also in case he was just being polite. I know guys have trouble saying no — at least they claim they do. I wanted him to have time to think it over.

3. it’s less stressful for me bc it’s left very casual I just prefer it.

Anyhow last week I didn’t show up bc I an emergency situation. I had to take a friend to the ER. I saw the guy after when I went to a place I go every day (he was studying)

I was going to apologize but I didn’t want to interrupt him.

Then he came over when I was getting my drink & he apologized to me for not showing up. He had planned to meet me the ext week bc I said why Thursday was ok.

(I’m paraphrasing bc it was a while ago now) I told him yeah I said it’s ok bc I meant it 😂 any Thursday IS OK. And anyhow I wasn’t there. I was going to apologize but didn’t want to bother him. And it’s always ok if he can’t come bc it was meant for him to come only if it’s easily done. For it not to be big deal.

He seemed to think I didn’t care if he showed up

I was like no I’m just explaining you don’t need to stress.

He asked if i still wanted to hang out. I said sure.

So this time I did show up I waited 5 minutes then went to get a protein smoothie like always after 🏊‍♀️. I ran into him again so I mean he’s def not hiding lol He explained he planned to meet me but —

I cut him off & asked him to please not apologize 🥵 He isn’t obligated to show up if he can’t, he can’t. If he can do it another day, great. It’s OK 💦

I know I look for this in a guy i would like to date because then I can share my special interest with him. Like I love superhero movies. It would be a bonus if he did too, of course different opinions but still takes an interest. Ultimately I think it's important to share doing something you both like doing together other than sex. Do you agree?

I miss dating but I start working 60hours soon. Would it be possible to date? Or should I hold off for awhile?

I won't have time to do dates...