I guess I ruin life of all around me. What should I do and Am I right?

Because of things I postponed I am very nervous all the time. I have an important exam and I couldn't and can't study. I am 24 but I haven't done anything yet for my life. I feel guilty and I argue with my family all the time as I have an argument with myself unfortunately. I am pessimistic usually. What can I do? By the way going to the psychiatrist isn't a choice for me (financial problems)

I guess I ruin life of all around me. What should I do and Am I right?
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