If your girlfriend was a fangirl, would that put you off?

[sunshine97_]

I'm 20 years old and have been obsessed with Korean boy bands and actors since I was 14. Would that be a deal breaker or would you not care?

[Tharzhiisdum]

If my girlfriend was a fangirl, that would imply that what she's a fan of is an important part of her life. If I had a problem with it (I. e. it turns me off) I'd probably not be the best match for them - I don't think people should change their (genuine) interests only for the purpose of other people (unless said interest brings harm to others)
So Korean boy bands I'm meh about personally, but generally anyone I'm interested in will have several strong and niche interests - it's part of what makes them interesting

[sunshine97_]

What if the girl was a fan of something/something you dislike, but she was a fan of other things you like?

[vincjh]

Everyone has their fandoms and interests. Why would that be a dealbreaker? I personally wouldn't care but then again I'm Asian so it's pretty common for Asian girls to like these things. I guess healthy level of fangirl is fine. Not until you have notebooks, posters, blankets, and your room filled with pictures. Then I guess that's fine.

If I can have my Star Wars fandom, she can have her Korean bands.

[sunshine97_]

I'm in a lot of fandoms including Anime, Marvel, DC, Harry Potter, arctic monkeys and Nirvana... i've noticed a few guys I talk to find these fine or cool if I fangirl over those, whereas if I mention Korean Bands/actor they seem weirder out "/

I've only got 2 photocards, a bracelet and a pair of socks (all of which are gifts from a friend) is that a dealbreaker)?

[vincjh]

I guess because Korean bands are perceived as nothing but pretty boys, they all look the same, bla bla bla. I'm guessing you're not Asian so I guess that's why guys find it weird to be fangirl over another race so hard.

No you're fine! That's nothing! Don't worry too much about it!

[sunshine97_]

Ahh I see, that makes sense... I honestly don't get why guys tend to bash pretty boys, that's like girls shaming other girls who have the sexy look instead of the cute look "/ .. from experience East Asian guys seem to not have an issue, I tend to face these reactions from guys of other/my race (South Asian)

[sunshine97_]

I guess I can help them understand my hype over these bands. If theyre not willing to understand it, that would show a lot about them XD

[Nicole_Is_Bored]

I'd say it wouldn't matter too much, but if it's a serious relationship, it'd piss me off if my partner prioritized their idol over me.

[sunshine97_]

What if your partner seemed super excited when talking about these idol a lot, in a serious relationship?

[Nicole_Is_Bored]

It would actually make me happy to buy them tickets to that idol, to make them joyous, but I'd obviously like the priority.

[sunshine97_]

I'd try to make my guy the priority, but scared of slipping up. I'm talking to this guy I'm interested in, but am too shy to compliment him to his face. Would you say complimenting these boy bands more than him, would put him off?

[Nicole_Is_Bored]

If he knows you're a heavy fangirl, he won't take it personally, but it'd be good to remind him that your his number one, even if it doesn't feel like it, just show him appreciation.

[Nicole_Is_Bored]

That's for when you get together if you do, though.

[sunshine97_]

Thanks for the tips, I really appreciate it xox

[Nicole_Is_Bored]

It's alright, if you ever need my advice again, just hit me up and we can DM on discord or something. 😘

[sunshine97_]

Sure, I'll DM when I need your advice :D

[Johnbadman]

As long as you don't take it too far like those deviant art/Tumblr gay smut fanfics and whatnot, had a lady friend introduce me to that and kept pestering me to read it which was a grievous mistake that i still regret to this day. Those reading materials were nightmare fuel to say the least in my opinion...

[sunshine97_]

Omg that post made me die XD that is literally the worst thing you can put someone through 😂 personally I find writing smut fanfic and dirty fanarts over someone you don't know, a bit creepy 😂😂

[Johnbadman]

I still cannot forget about it, I never thought a gay potterxmalfoy who are also both vampires as a story would exist and work... Well it existed but it didn't work the story was horrible and was all over the place, the only thing that actually made sense was the smut which is... colorful to say the least. And don't get me started with the Winchester fanfics cause that's a bloody Bee hive that

[sunshine97_]

I get you, a lot of these fanfics tend to be poorly written and it just annoys me when they add in random things that contradict the actual story/movie 😣 the last time i checked draco and harry were both wizards 😒... Trust me, what you described is actually mild compared to what I came across XD I even found a fanfic which was a remake of the little mermaid, replace Obama with the Prince and Taemin (korean male popstar) with the little mermaid

[Johnbadman]

Well I'm not gonna go around looking for trouble so I'm just gonna keep to reading actual novels and such 😃

[sunshine97_]

XD Loool me too... You know what they say? Ignorance is bliss

[ThePragmaticRomantic]

While it's not a fandom I share, or would have an interest in participating in, its not something I would see as an issue (unless we are talking creepy super fan who makes her boyfriend wear a mask and has a lock of hair she stole from one of the band members :P )
A girl without any interests or fandoms is a much bigger put-off.

[Portissac]

Just started watching Korean singers and wdnt mind at all

[sunshine97_]

No way, which singers? So you wouldn't see it as a problem if your girlfriend talked about the singers quite a lot, especially the ones she finds attractive?

[Portissac]

In UK and there is an Korean channel in English I watch. Couple of pop shows with boy bands some Really good. No issue regarding girlfriend liking groups or talking about them

[sunshine97_]

Omg how did I not know about this? Which channel? I'm from the UK too 😮

What if she mentions she finds them hot, would that bother you?

[Portissac]

Sorry for lateness
It's channel 214 on freesat
Station is called Ariang TV
Lots of pop which is cute

[Portissac]

Wdnt object if she thought them hot

[sunshine97_]

It's alright 😄 but omg thanks so much, I'll defo check if Arirang is on TV. Years ago I tried finding it on TV, but no luck :( ... Thanks So much for your answer

[Portissac]

If u have freesat you'll be okay and possibly fine with Freeview and Sky

[sunshine97_]

Thanks I defo am gonna be checking it out

[Portissac]

Let me know how u like it

[Mochastar]

I'd encourage and try to learn what is do great about the fandoms

[OmgItsJoe123]

No excess = all good.

[sunshine97_]

What do you class as stepping into the excess boundary?

[OmgItsJoe123]

You know when someon ise literally obsessed with his/her crush... that's when things get bad.

[sunshine97_]

What about if it involves talking about how hot the actors/singers are?

[OmgItsJoe123]

To be honest with you, I would declare war on these normies. How? Prove they're worthless to look at... and I am the one she needs. Everything's got its limits.

[Manhart1999]

Just a little, otherwise it's all good

[sunshine97_]

Why would it put you off a little?

[Manhart1999]

It's like only if u r crazy about them. Like Korean boy bands this, Korean boy bands that, Korean boy bands everywhere. I would feel it's almost fine, but shouldn't be too much

[sunshine97_]

Ahh I see, I would usually bring it up once in a while during convos if I'm using them as examples to make a point, other than that I usually talk about whats within our common ground. Is that a deal breaker?

[Manhart1999]

No then. U have ur tastes and am completely fine with it. Would even join on occasions

[CaaTalam]

As long as it's not too extreme I'm fine

[sunshine97_]

What would you class as stepping into the boundary of extreme?

[CaaTalam]

How do I put this ok I really love NFL Football and as long as she's not obsessed more than I am with football it's fine

[olderbudweiser]

Whats a fangirl?

[sunshine97_]

Fangirl definitions:

Noun - a female fan, especially one who is obsessive about comics, film, music and fictional novels.

Verb - a female fan who behaves in an obsessive or overexcited way over these said interests above.

[sunshine97_]

In my case, my fangirling is over the interests stated in my description under the question.

[olderbudweiser]

Ahhh well I've never known a girl to that level of obsession but i know a few cosplay girls who are passionate bout it but it doesn't rule their lives

[sunshine97_]

I'm comfortable with fangirling over anime with the guy I'm interested in, as our obsession is similar, that it kinda influences our dress sense, hair and makeup.

Would it be off putting to him (or guys in general) if I talk about korean singers or actors a lot, especially if i talk about how attractive they are?

[olderbudweiser]

Not at all. What you're doing is being a fan of a genre n its normal. When i was a teen i was a punk. Coloured hair, clothes etc... its normal

[Gavyn]

Not necessarily :)

[GayHowellMeme]

It would put me off

[Anonymous]

I would care

[sunshine97_]

Why is that out of curiousity?

[Opinion Owner]

She is MINE i am HERS period.