Why DO women love attention so much?

Question

I made a post about this on Whisper some days ago and it was the first one in a very long time that got loads of responses from females, who were mostly saying yeah, that's true and others who outright admitted they do love attention even though they know it's shallow.

So now I'm asking GaG: why do females love attention so much? Why is there such an obsession with a need to be seen and glorified? Why does that matter to females so much? Even when the attention is bad they will still like talking about it because it still means someone is acknowledging them even if it makes them "uncomfortable."

TruthBringer · Accepted Answer

Many things. In today's society, many women are growing up in fatherless homes. They crave masculine love from a father figure. As they lack this, they tend to search this in others, often the wrong sort of men. Because they cannot distinguish the good man from the bad due to lack of fatherly guidance and love, they fall for the charisma of the 'bad boy' types easier. This is turn causes many emotional pain because we all know that these men are notorious. In my experience, the girls who grew up with a loving and guiding father do not feel the need to fish for attention from others. At least not on the same level as those who didn't grow up with a father.

Another big issue is due to social media. Society and social media are putting major pressure on (young) women to be desired and getting a bunch of dudes chasing them. If not, then there is "something wrong with them". Which is of course a lie.

Point 3 is that getting attention is easy. It's just easy dopamine highs. One that is very dangerous and addicting. WAY TOO MANY (young) women in today's society have made their self-esteem dependent on. If they don't get a bunch of dudes in their DMs or don't get enough 'likes' as they want, they will become insecure. And frankly, it's just EASY and QUICK self-esteem/ego boost.

And much of this is thanks to men as well. Let's face it, if we didn't have so many sex-deprived simps desperate for female validation, then women wouldn't feel the need to take advantage of it. It's because of men that things like OnlyFans and InstaThots exist. If men in their mass stop pedestalizing women, then women will be forced to introspect and find their confidence within other qualities.

Whateveryousay99 · Accepted Answer

Attention for women is literally their oxygen. They need attention to survive from the opposite gender. There’s a reason why they post sexy pictures of themselves on the internet. This is why they like to go out on girls nights out and dress sexy and look good even when they have a boyfriend or husband at home. Why? Because women know deep down subconsciously that their value comes from the way that they look. That’s why even when the pandemic hit, with Covid and hair salons, nail salons, makeup industry were still making money hand over fist. Why? Because the beauty industry is never going to go out of business because women know there value comes from the way that they look. Simply put, an ugly women that has a career is equivalent to like a dude that’s homeless and a hobo. Both of them are useless to society. No one gives a f**k so since you know a woman’s value comes from exactly how she looks, she needs constant validation and oxygen to keep that car going so never give them attention for free. She has to pay premium to get her gasoline from you.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Well contrary to your belief I’ve always had a lot of attention even though I’ve not always enjoyed or wanted it (at times I’d deliberately put more effort into making myself less attractive just to avoid it!) But yes, sometimes it’s nice - that’s human nature, nothing more. Anyhow I never set my self esteem on this kind of think, I always valued respect! I’m an outdoorsy type who like to push myself and enjoys autonomous challenges as well as teamwork in activities. I value respect and that’s where my self esteem comes from, gaining confidence to overcome challenges and gaining respect from my teammates around me. I also have a degree and a profession where I also enjoy the feeling of being respected. I’m happy dressing casually with no makeup and just enjoying life - that’s where the best part of life is for me, that’s where I feel fulfilled. But I also understand that my partner likes it when I dress up and make an effort too, so I do that for him to enjoy because it makes me feel good when he appreciates it too.

Medicalbug · Accepted Answer

Agree with the evolutionary comment and want to add - as a female, you’re also overlooked a lot and given attention for the wrong reasons, so I tend to have periods of time where I am either revolted by attention or seek it out because I just don’t feel properly heard. For example, sometimes when I work in a team and have a great idea, I will see people automatically defaulting to the male in the group and I feel the need to counteract. I am sure this has influenced my behavior and caused me to develop habits to attract more attention. I might not be looking for male protection like in the old days, but I am trying to garner security for myself in a different way. It’s survival just in a modern setting.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

They love it because they get to feel lusted after and desired. This is purely an ego thing. It's the same reason you hear so many women of color bitch about eurocentric beauty standard, even though the standard is a blend of caucasian and ethnic features; women of color want to be lusted after by ALL men. Not just some; ALL.

bookish_bengali · Answer

I can’t answer for all women. But now and then I do get into that phase where I feel like I am missing out when I stumble across other girls stories of being “That Girl.”

And for me it’s definitely when I lose sight of my own bigger picture/my goals /values etc.

I think this happens when I try to feel good through external validations rather than do the “hard work” that makes you feel good in long run.

A more technical term for this is approval addiction or perceived perfectionism I believe it was coined by Dr David Burns , I might be wrong. This I think also has to do with low self esteem as well.

JSmuve · Answer

It's because feeling desirable is an emotional need of many women. And this need is satisfied when they receive attention, especially from guys they like. It's why lots of women are addicted to social media and post provocative pictures of themselves; the affirming comments from simps make them feel good about themselves. It's like crack to them. When they don't get this attention, that's when they start to question their desirability and you see questions like "how come nobody approaches me" or "what can I do to get guys' attention". It's also why women insist on guys' approaching; when he does it, she gets her emotional need satisfied.

Anonymous · Answer

As a man, I have always needed attention from women, and I think both men and women want about the same amount of attention. Women post more selfies on social media because they know that gets a man's attention, while men show off their cars, their muscles, their sports skills, their humour, because that's what gets some women's attention. The difference is that a woman gets that attention instantly, while the man has to approach the woman, and if he has the qualities mentioned above, he is more likely to get attention.

FreyaRed · Answer

Gaining attention serves self-evaluation. This is easier for girls in internet, you post a pic in underwear and you get it. Practically null effort job.
Boys crave for attention as well, but they do it while being best ball player, best talker, having always presentable girls around him... It's more difficult to farm attention with those thing online for boys.
That's why there is a disproportion among attention seeking boy and girls in social media.

FifiJones · Answer

All love it.
They just grabbed it as their right and decided they will receive it and men must suffer and give it. Girls songs are about how much theybare enjoying, boy songs are about how much they are suffering.
Can you reply to this so I can check if GAG silently blocked me? thanks

Anonymous · Answer

Unlike men, most women don't have much stuff going on with their lives. On average, they don't pursue higher careers or have different hobbies. In families, women's children get ignored while growing up, plus they see that their mothers have to deal with so much after marriage, where husbands are always busy working outside and they have to deal with much stuff with less fun. So seeking attention is mosts primary objective while they can. That's why almost whole Instagram, Snapchat, and TikTok videos are made by women. It makes them feel validated and wanted which they know will perish soon as they don't have any real talent.

Anonymous · Answer

I was on holiday for a few weeks (from work) and when i came back, this woman ran right up to me and asked why I didn't say anything to her on Friday. A Friday that was 3 weeks ago? Apparently I was so excited about my time off I walked right by her without noticing. Then a bunch of other guys said she'd been talking about it to them. The girl is gorgeous and voluptuous... but my time off is more important. I'm not one to give women attention. I've had some block my path, 'accidentally' run into me, shout at me in frustration etc.

Attention to women, is what sex is to men... in a sense.

shaysh87 · Answer

BOTH MEN AND WOMEN LOVE ATTENTION.

it’s just that females need it wayy more.
The evolutionary reason for this is that females need attention from males in order to survive. Females who craved attention from males were more likely to be protected by them AND more likely to reproduce. Females who didn’t want male attention tended to be unprotected and less likely to reproduce.

don’t listen to the guy who said it’s fatherlessness that cause women to crave attention. There are PLENTY of women who grew up with a father and still crave attention. When I was younger , I thrived off of attention. Including many of my friends. It’s a very common thing

Women who crave attention tend to be the younger , immature girls. The need for attention tends to fade as one matures.

Anonymous · Answer

Genuine positive attention makes anybody feel good. However men don’t need it (nor expect it) to survive in this world. To us respect is what matters.

Anyway I just wish women can expecting to get “selective” attention from men they like vs ones they don’t especially when they dress a certain way. I don’t like cat callers and creeps anymore than they do. It’s gross. However you can’t magically filter that out no matter how much you complain about it. A quit calling it part of “patriarchy”. The vast majority of guys hate that bullshit too.

Also by the way I have gotten unwanted attention before from very unattractive women (sometimes aggressively). This included women 20+ years my senior and/or women who weigh more than i do. In these scenarios these women get more leeway to do this crap just because they are women. I made me very uncomfortable but I am not losing sleep over it.

hi_it_is_me123 · Answer

Same reason why men love sex so much to the point it is the norm to be an easy manhoe. You guys would fuck so many women if you had the opportunity. (I made a poll that confirm my point At least we ain't cheap and fuck every hole that move. I would prefere a man who loves attention over sex. All of the guy problems would be solved if guys were not so desperate for sex. This is why i am fascinated by virgin men and worship (lol) virgin men or men with low bodycount because they have great self-control.

Anonymous · Answer

Narcissism plain and simple. Women have tremendous ego's. It begins in puberty. Guys start to notice their development when the hormones start flowing and from then on it's a dependent addiction with them. This is why you see women get depressed and start slummingand sleeping around when they're attention starved. They're a junkie at that point looking for their attention fix.

SynthKobra · Answer

In my observation, it seems to simply be a biological mechanism hardwired in women. I really am unsure why - I could guess and say it has something to do with some primal "worth" meter but I can say that it is very observable and cannot be denied that it exists.

Naimgood · Answer

Why women love attention is the same reason why people have social media. Peer validation and social acceptance aren't just a want. Unlike other animals, humans are much more dependent on each other for much longer. Humans can't acquire food by themselves until they're a teenager with a job. But even through the history of the human species we can't even run or get away from predators for years after being born. This is why social acceptance is a biological imperative for our species. I think girls skinning it on Instagram is a cultural thing and I'm not a fan of it. If a girl I'm with has half naked pics on any internet platform I will never consider a future with that person. Ever

Brainsbeforebeauty · Answer

You mean why do people? I just got invited to a post today where the guy was shirtless asking women how he looked (want the first time been invited to a pic like that either... Was that not attention seeking? And men sending dick pics, is that not attention seeking🤔 Not all people like, are comfortable with or seek out attention, and those that do, it's not just females...

ShaTTeredMasterpeace · Answer

Why do men complain about women wanting attention when they're the ones breaking their necks to give it to them?

Everyone on this earth wants to be seen and appreciated at some point. Do some people go overboard with that need to have the attention on them? Sure they do. But I wouldn't say that it's every woman. Probably not even most. I'm not a person that enjoys attention being on me. I'd say that that was case about 90% of the time because again, I'm human lol.

Asad1ONE1 · Answer

Because they want us so much. Duh 🙄. The only issue is that many don't admit why. It's a power game for them (manipulation). And they actually believe they're helping their case by lying. Instead, they're doing just the opposite. It's no wonder why many men don't give women the time of day (or second). How's that turning out for them? I feel bad for the good, honest women.

Joker_ · Answer

Men are not generally broadcasting themselves on social media with tons of selfies to get attention. And men don't complain about what kind of attention they do get. So I think it's more of a woman thing, yeah.

red324 · Answer

They're insecure and constantly ask stupid questions like if their friend is hot etc. Easiest way to get rid of a girl is to say yes. Lol You won't see her again.

Alyssa_11 · Answer

I love attention. Good attention though. I don’t like being harassed lol. Why do I love it? I don’t know. It makes me feel good. I’m wired this way. If I’m in a relationship though attention from my partner alone is more than enough.

Mediterraneansoul · Answer

I think most women naturally have middle child syndrome lol
Nah i think it's more biological than one can understand. Their bodies go through cycles of hormonal changes daily which make them feel the need to be validated all most the time if not by on another it's by men. But men don't give them the exact response they get from each other hence why men are always guilty by default. However, this also applies to some men out there with deficiencies lol or aka bitch ass mother f**ers 😋

Packer03 · Answer

Everyone loves attention. It feeds the ego. For women I think it’s driven by two things. One is because in a patriarchal society where men hold key positions of authority and visibility, women are often overlooked or seen as subservient. That’s wrong and unfortunate. The natural response to that is to seek more attention in order to level the playing field. Secondly, in my opinion women’s bodies lend themselves to drawing attention, largely because there are more erogenous zones that, unrevealed, are visually attractive to men. It’s sexuality, plus society’s standards for women (clothing, colors, makeup, jewelry, hair design, etc.) that allow them to stand out. Standing out draws attention. I appreciate that women can and need to stand out and draw attention.

Bel88 · Answer

I have to admit that I do like receiving attention, because it really does reinforce self-confidence levels when they're low.
Besides, I deserve the attention, because it's a fact that I'm the centre of the universe and the most important person on the planet! :P

England4eva · Answer

Because the most beautiful girls have the pick of any guy they desire. The more attention she is given the more clarification that she is the highest prize and can ultimately pick the best guy. Also if a guy sees that ten other guys are interested in the girl he likes, he will want her so much more.

Kroberts16 · Answer

A woman wanting attention from guys is the same as guys wanting to screw around with lots of women. The woman and man in both instances have low self esteem and need their fixes to feel good about themselves. If men would stop having their tongues out when women dress for attention and women have more respect for themselves and not give their bodies to everyone, the world would be different but unfortunately, that's not the case.

DarkCarousel · Answer

The men who seek this type of woman continue to validate their attention seeking behavior. It’s a cycle.

We must also acknowledge that there are men out there that don’t seek this type of woman AND that there are women out there that don’t seek attention.

Anonymous · Answer

There are ways an ego is fed for both men and women. Attention is something that feeds women's egos. It makes most of us feel good, wanted, and remembered. I think it only gets shallow when we're low because some of us can crave it and some of us don't care which guy it comes from. Sometimes, (some women) will even accept it from men their not interested in where their interest only goes as deep as the attention they are receiving.

Anonymous · Answer

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SHB84 · Answer

I've noticed that when women are generalizing men... they often state things that women are actually known for.

Alwayreckles93 · Answer

I would have to say only the narcissist human. A normal human in general hates attention. I hate being the center of attention.

Babygirl_S · Answer

Not all of us want attention. Some of is want respect.

Ez-Bri-Z · Answer

I personally don't. Its a phobia of mine, but this isn't a woman specific thing. It does boost ego for some, but let's be honest, there are a lot of guys out there who would crave a bunch of attention from females too.

VanillaSalt · Answer

I get where you were going with this but you did it wrong lol. Everyone loves attention but women can get away with posting selfie’s online and they get it because men give it too easy. A hoes a hoe stop simpin fools.

Anonymous · Answer

Tbf any person likes positive attention, be it a guy or a girl. Key words here being “positive attention”.

Guccigabbana18 · Answer

Because it’s an ego boost as it shows we are attractive and desirable in our minds.

Apple1996 · Answer

It's not that we love attention but more so that getting attention makes us feel loved/valued...

dolemite89 · Answer

that’s why u should ignore them more 😂 it drives them crazy

exitseven · Answer

Just about everyone likes some attention sometime. Even if they do not admit it.

CherryDarlingXoXo · Answer

To validate our self worth, we seek reassurance & it gives us a purpose. Between myself and my boyfriend, it gets scary because he's the one that's constantly thirsty for attention. I'm more private and self conscious so I avoid bringing attention to me. He basically needs to open the windows at 4am and pick an argument while broadcasting it, with his friend on speaker, sounding like Mrs. Nisbit while shouting "YOU SEE HOW SHE TREATS ME!" ... like wow, all I said was Stfu, it's 4am.

xJayleenx · Answer

For me I just like attention from my boyfriend any other attention makes me uncomfortable due to me being very shy.

Anonymous · Answer

It is in their nature. The Bible talks about how Eve was created to be a helper for Adam and to cure his loneliness. Deep down women want to feel loved and admired by men because they were designed to be loved and admired by men. Whenever any human helps another, it is our nature to want to be thanked or acknowledged for the effort.

Razp_Sorbet · Answer

Women* And who doesn't love getting attention? It feels good being noticed in a positive way. It's a great self esteem boost. I don't like negative attention

AdithyaR · Answer

That's not a gender thing, a lot of people like attention.
Generally the only ones who don't like attention would be introverts and people with anxiety. Beyond that, everyone likes getting attention because it's innately flattering.

Jessica745855 · Answer

Women don't like attention. Some women do and some don't. I think it has to do with each individual person.

dustybiker · Answer

Life can be boring. Nothing wrong with someone wanting to liven things up.

Anonymous · Answer

The term attention whore wasn't coined for nothing.

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Sonorous · Answer

There is always evolutionary reasoning for our behaviors. We can never escape the ooga booga. We can tame it. But we can never escape it.  *whispers* We are the ooga booga

Anonymous · Answer

I believe females were created by GOD with a legitimate need for adoration and that’s one of the reasons why GOD made females so Beautiful. . so we would get it lol. Men want respect or reverence and women want love or adoration.

Sarahdelacruz · Answer

I love it when no one notices me. I go out dressed terribly just so I don’t get attention. I hate attention especially from men.

Hangry06 · Answer

I personally don't think it's restricted to one gender. Most humans love attention in general. Women can be easily spotted due to the revealing part

bear926 · Answer

Same reason why anyone loves attention…? Lol. It feels nice to be noticed. It’s not just a woman thing. Even animals love attention.

Better_off_here · Answer

well they do not need to since most men like them anyway just the way they are. but some folks are just attention whores who we should ignrore.

Anonymous · Answer

because we are attention-hungry, sensitive, over-emotional creatures.

whirled_up_girl · Answer

I prefer to go unnoticed, that's why I didn't complain much about having to wear masks and I don't mind having to bundle up for winter either.

Gwenhwyfar · Answer

Good attention is fun 😊. Bad attention I don’t like.

Heartache0405 · Answer

The question shouldn’t be why do women live attention so much. It should be “why do women love specific attention from specific men so much?”

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

They are insecure. They need men’s attention as validation that they’re beautiful.

rabbitzzz · Answer

Is it just women though. Not getting enough attention is a social death sentence. Its like you are so low value. Your survival instinct kicks in.

Anonymous · Answer

Men love attention as much as women, probably even more.

Why DO women love attention so much?

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