How to lose the just a friend image?

[Anonymous]

I am a decent looking guy, and I fall for decent looking Girls. I always get told they only like me as a friend. 4 Girls in Total both the Girls i had for a while wanted to return to just being friends for the first one it was even after fucking a lot for months but i never came close to a relationship again. After girl 2 dumped me i always got to hear u are Just a friend or im not willing to risk the friendship.

Cause I am Just being myself to. them they feel safe to. talk about everything and expect all the boyfriend things of. me except for actually being the boyfriend. I Tried changing up my attitude towards the girl i currently want but it only. made her. mad

[SAMI_DABBAB]

Brutal honesty works

[Asker]

Not. for. me. Just tried

[SAMI_DABBAB]

Seems like you have a lot of untold backstory that would help others give better opinions, I suggest you have the same conversation with someone who has known you for a couple of years at least

[Asker]

Lets summarise my back story cause except for thst girl i have no one to ask this. I Got bullied in school a lot , Girls responded to. me with bad jokes or calling me ugly when finding out i was interested. Then i finally found a girl that gave me a shot. She took. my virginity and then despite always telling. me i was the best boyfriend she ever had she cheated on me and dumped me but wanted to stay friends after that. Offcourse i was depressed then still got bullied despite being the one that had had the hottest girl compared to the other guys. (Dudes words) not long after i met the girl i like now offcourse i. wasn't able. to love yet and she was too young to think about her that way. But when I finally

[Asker]

was ready to love and and she finally was old enough we kinda broke contact for. a. while got a relationship with number 2 but we got contact again and she told. me. that girl wasn't good enough for me. A month or 2. later i find out she was right but offcourse. again there. was no contact between. me. and the current. girl then.

So a few. years. pass. I get. contact with her. again she been in the same relationship for about.3 years now we talk little disagree about some shit but finally we end up talking 24/7 but it took.2 days. before she. was taken. Almost 1,5 year same guy but then she. tells. me. she. dreamed about having a date. with me so I think to. myself finally and he was being an ass at the. moment so. i. decide to be decent and Just wait till its over hoping she finally got her feelings for. me. back. thanks. to. our. age gap i couldn't answer them the first time. So i. tell her. how i. like her but now she Just want me. as a friend. So. seems im only. interestinf when its wrong. Normally i. would have walked away by now but somehow we always get back to eachother. And her being the only one i can talk to about everything also. makes it not an option.

Besides her i liked. some. other Girls too in the past wich was. less complicated but thanks to number 1 and 2 that actually gave me a shot proven to half put up an act of being nice Girls I always try to. bond with them. first cause i can't risk feeling that worthless over bitches again
but. can. never get. past the friendship status but have seen a lot of guys do it

[SAMI_DABBAB]

I think the best thing you can do is not be available for people who are in difficult situations, you don't need the headache and fantasising sucks, if you could just not be the reliable person you are to girls in funked up stories you'll have more time to shoot your shot with others while also not being influenced by past stories.

I personally suggest if you change your environment and start dealing with people who you can build a new impression for, like you'll focus on demonstrating how much you're not the friend, by again not being available to people in desperate situations

[Asker]

She Just sended me a message it won't Change cause i been her buddy for years.

But thank you , this advice i can actually do. something with

[Asker]

And yes im not gonna be that reliable for from now on

[SAMI_DABBAB]

I wish you the absolute best because you really wanna change : )

[Asker]

Yeah I don't wanna always be the buddy, while giving boyfriend level effort.