Is it bad that I’ll rather have male attention and validation vs love?

[Anonymous]

Why is that a “bad” or “sad” thing? Yeah I had some bad experiences but that’s not the reason. I just love it and I’m happy with what I do. I don’t get it

[HighlyQuestionable]

Honestly?

Yes it is "bad".

I have no idea what "validation" is in this context, but

As a man, I want a relationship, I don't want to just "hook up" or stroke someone's ego, and have nothing to show for it.

[alacrity]

Its not necessarily bad, but im not sure it will bring happiness in the long term.

My thoughts are this: everyone grows old, and the thing you do for validation will likely change or stop. If you're happy primarily because of this attention, itll get more difficult later.

On the other hand, if you grow a love, it will take more time to get much out if it, but you would have a long term value. And that doesn't have to be romantic! Good company can be anywere, i think.

[Billlewis]

Not necessarily. It depends on how you feel about it.

[Asker]

I mean some parts of me want to be valued but I gave up on it. I feel very happy with doing what I do

[Robocod]

As long as you're honest with those men it's not bad, it's just your life choice. If you lead them on and let them think they've got a chance with you that's called manipulation and it's bad.

[Asker]

When I say validation and attention I mean like only fans type stuff.. I always either tell them I’m not looking for anything serious or show disinterest.

[Robocod]

Oh I see.
If you're as honest as you say then, again, it's your choice as well as paying for your contents is theirs so ok I see no problem in that.

Please keep in mind this though: doing OF puts a "recreational use only" label on you. It's going to compromise your value on dating scene if one day you'll ever decide to settle down because you won't be on the radar of those who are looking for a wife and mother of their children. Today you can still change your path, but if you end up doing OF at like 35 the game is over.
And be aware that you can't make content forever, you're not getting younger, in few years all the attention you like will go to the brand new 20 years old hottie and you won't stand a chance against her. Your subscribers don't love you either, they'll abandon you for the fresher meat.

I'm sorry if I sound rude, but I gave you the ugly dark side of doing OF because I fear so far you only have considered the bright side.

[Asker]

Yeah I see your point. Thank God I’m getting my tubes tied. I can’t see myself being a mother. I don’t plan on doing this for years.

There’s hotter women than me now. That’s the whole reason I like adult film…. I’m not hot but I have other things to offer that isn’t all about my face.

Thank God for cosmetic surgery.

[Vegasrunner]

No it is standard female behavior. You're ahead of the game because at least you're being honest with yourself.

[hassan9873]

I like it too.. it's not bad, you'll be rejected by some men.. but some will be happy too.. haha

[Nemesis2k7]

Its normal for narcissistic people to have their ego fed. I notice this is common for a lot of females. Only affection and "love" come into it when she wants something. Money, power , control.

[Meropatrick]

Its better than seeking female validation i think

[aceleon]

it makes you a inherently insecure person.

[Asker]

How?

[aceleon]

your own validition isn't enough so you seek from outside

[Asker]

Maybe lol

[TheSpaceGnome]

It makes you undesireable.

[Asker]

I was already 🤷‍♀️

[jahaims]

You will end up old and empty.

[LazerBean]

Yes.

[LexiHunnyP93]

@LazerBean I agree :) hope you dont mind me saying I think your super sexy :)

[FoyLee]

LOL you don’t get it what?

[BarryLiverstone]

Yes..

[Asker]

Why? I’m just curious🙃

[BarryLiverstone]

Because love is the best. Attention seeking isn’t

[Asker]

Love isn’t guaranteed to anyone. No matter how much you root for it

[BarryLiverstone]

Same thing with attention. But love is earned

[Asker]

So is validation lol….

[BarryLiverstone]

Nope. Validation isn’t really earned. Too many give it away

[Asker]

I work hard for it

[BigDog1989]

very

[OddBeMe]

Longterm, probably.