Attention seeking women

[brandon8899]

Sawthis girl I really liked for a month. She kissed me, madeout with and was pretty much all over me every time we went out together. You would think we were in a relationship. She never wanted a boyfriend though. She had been talking to this other guy, he calls her almost everyday to say how much he misses her. She tells him she is too busy but she still leads him on. She would leave Facebook statuses about this other guy too, like the morning after she hungout with me and we did our usual kissing and what not. She also posts a lot of stupid attention seeking statuses on Facebook. She also has an ex boyfriend she was with all through high school who also texts her all the time and apparently still loves her.. So basically she strings along multiple guys, but why? what's her benefit in doing this. She has also told me about guys she has gone out on dayes with and stops seeing them for really shallow reasons. So basically just imagine a girl with three "guy" friends. One she currently goes out with, kisses him and all touchy feely. The second calls her all the time to get things started up again, she doesn't tell him off but instead apologizes for being to busy but still lets him call her. Then her ex boyfriend is still in the picture and she lets him poor out his undying love for her and she just takes it all in for her own personal benefit. Wish I never wasted my time with a girl like this, but she is absolutely beautiful though..

[udolipixie]

1. So basically she strings along multiple guys, but why?

I'm not seeing how she's stringing them along as I see no mention of her making promises to them or such.

She's interacting with guys who want more with her than she wants with them. I see no mention of her saying she wants more or will give them more.

Only iffy to me is the guy who attempts to start things up and she apologizes for being too busy as in that case she could be doing the wimpy maybe he'll take a hint bit.

2. what's her benefit in doing this?Possibly attention, power, being able to headf*ck people, low self-esteem, boredom, entertainment.

"She kissed me, madeout with and was pretty much all over me every time we went out together. You would think we were in a relationship. She never wanted a boyfriend though."

Seems like you two had some fun but there was no mention of a relationship or having a conversation establishing where the two or you are or are going you wanted more or assume it would lead there and got pissy it didn't.

Not much different than a gal who sleeps with a guy and assumes that this means he's her boyfriend and in a monogamous relationship with her.

Though the "she never wanted a boyfriend though" inclines me to think you knew from the get go that it wasn't going to lead to a relationship.

[Anonymous]

i have a 'friend'... well frenemy, like this exactly!

the truth is she's actually insecure about herself. she just doesn't know it. and she also wants to be liked and loved by every guy there is and she would give anything to be the centre of attention. it's like a self esteem boost for her or something. with this she has stuff to brag about and she feels like she has to prove to everyone that she can get whoever she wants to like her.

usually these are the kind of girls you want to stay away from. seriously watch out! they may seem like they really like you one day and the next day they'll find someone else to flirt with. these girls don't want a relationship, especially a long term one. they're just 'enjoying' themselves at the moment but they may get bored with this over time.

seriously though show her you're not weak like the other guys that like her and show her you're not going to fall for her act. there are so many other nice girls out there!

oh yeah and a little tip: if she flirts with you again... do not fall for it! it's all an act and she's just experimenting. it's like you're the mouse and she's the scientist. :P

hope that last bit made sense.

[May31]

Sounds like she's the kind of girl that only likes the kissing & other parts but not the actual relationship. She's most likely doing this because she needs the attention. She probably didn't have this much attention before & now that she's got it, she'll take it to her advantage. There's no other way can explain this though, only she knows the real reason.

[Prof_Don]

Do me a favor, QA.

Read the last six (6) words of your question.

THERE is your problem. You got all "goo-goo" for this girl that is obviously an emotional user...cauz she's beautiful?

*bangs head against wall*

You must learn (and this does take time) to de-sensitize yourself from the attractiveness of females, and treat them the same as guys (presuming you're 100% heterosexual).

In essence, no sucking up, and no preferential treatment because she's pretty.

Girls that goox looking are used to that, and will (intentionally or not) fiscally/emotionally use people.

Before you think I'm crazy, this is quite the effective mindset.

The other 2 guys you're talking abt, fell right into her "usability". If a girl is being shady, (gracefully) confront her about it...

...cauz honestly, would you let a GUY be shady with you and you just ignore it?

-----

Precisely.

[MrNameless]

I don't know man.. If everything you've said is true, then you should really stop going after this woman.

Yeah, there are definitely a lot of attention seeking girls out there who will string guys along, as it gives them an ego boost. I've had a bad experience with this myself.. This girl would constantly talk about her exes(badly about them.. But I didn't really care) and in 3 ocassions--talk about other guys she was interested-- in front of me.. And she knew I liked her, and she liked me back. Whatever her intention was (maybe she wanted me to make a move on her by trying to make me jealous) I don't know.. But those are girls 'd stay away from ASAP. They don't know what they want..

[rachael19]

sometimes the issue with this woman is a lot deeper, she may seem like she's attention seeking but really she may want the guy but think he's too good for her like the way I acted. do you assume a girl like this only wants attention from the guy and not want him as a boyfriend?

[AmberChick]

Guys can be blinded by looks sometimes and here is a perfect example of that. Of course when someone is beautiful it does not mean they are also beautiful on the inside. But, it doesn't seem like she or you are doing anything wrong or that it really bothers you that much.

[rachael19]

'but she is absolutely beautiful though?'...erm, superficial much? I notice how that's the ONLY reason you say why you like her and why you made such effort with her...Also I see nothing wrong with her being friends with her ex nor having guy friends! I have tons of guy friends who fancy me but the fact is I am NOT leading them on because they know where they stand. So unless this girl is offering all three guys a chance with her then she's doing NOTHING wrong.

[geronimojoesaephus]

I think we've all been drawn in to a girl like this. My advice is to walk away. SHe'll never see the wrong in what she's doing. She'll make it out that you were the person that was unreasonable. When someone regularly talks smack about exes, people she dated, or her friends (guy or girl), those are warning signs that should NOT be ignored. I was sucked in by a girl like that, and now that we're through, she still tries to take a giant smelly dump on life.

Just RUN.

[kholland65]

Tell this girl to go f*** herself and then make sure you inform the other guys about what she is doing. This girl is an attention whore and a sh*tty person. Drop her. Better yet, use her by getting in her pants, then kick her to the curb the next day. Nothing feels better than turning the tables on your abuser. Worked for me in a similar situation.

[Cryostatic]

Honestly, I'd probably kick her to the curb, and hard. For her benefit, really. She's probably never been broken up with in her life. After all, she's going to break up with you eventually.

Hell, having the tables turned might even make her nuts about you. Who knows? Either way, you don't really lose.

[GymStatus]

She is the type who will always have men around her. She is not serious about relationships. Personally I would back off of her. She is stringing you the other guy and her ex along. It is padding her insecurities of not being noticed or liked. I hate to tell you that you are caught in her web lol. You are the "kissing guy" to her. Nothing more.

[CrystalMinds]

She needs attention, she needs to have guys "chasing" her so she feels wanted and pretty and whatever. It's an egothingy, she feels confident when guys want her.

How old is she if I may ask?

[adamcdavis]

yep this is exactly it sadly.

[Anonymous]

This girl has issues. She needs constant reminder that she's beautiful and wanted. Honour the bro code and let the other guys know what's going on, then watch her confidence go downhill.

[chettah-two]

leave her alone, she'll suck the life out of you

[ZenQueen]

She's a player! What more is there to say?