Attention seeking women?

[Anonymous]

This married girl I work with pursued and still pursues attention from me. When I first started she went crazy for my attention would find ways to talk to me then back off for a while then come back. I'd get pissed and ignore her because I felt it was a game. I felt like she had a crush on my friend too but never really saw them talking ever. Only flirting trying to get his attention stuff but never talkng. I talked to other girls all the time and talked about other girls being hot around her. There were a few times where she flirted with him hard in front of me and I was t sure if it was to make me jealous or get his attention or both. Still a mystery. I started skipping many of our group lunches so I couldnt be made jealous and she started skipping all of them. Her and I did a back and forth thing for like 5 months and I finally decided to ignore her for almost two months. I was cold to her too. I could tell she was pissed. My buddy tells me she has been walking and talking with him during this time and that its weirding him out. It's been over a year now. She still tries to get my attention but we don't talk near as much as we used to. I know that she texts another buddy of mine who used to work here. I also know that she goes looking for attention from other guys at work too. I feel like she does this more if I ignore her but I could be wrong?

[meatballs21]

There's a girl I suspect is similar (but not as extreme) in my workplace. She's extremely cute and knows it, and I've been told by people who've been here longer that she loves the attention, loves to watch guys squirm and toys with them even though she has a boyfriend.

I knew she had a boyfriend before, but knowing she messes people around like this has completely put me off talking to her.

[Asker]

Yep yep

[meatballs21]

Don't pay her any more attention than you want to, or than you have to for professional reasons like working together.

[martyfellow]

She sounds unbalanced. You would do well do be indifferent, NOT ignore her, just don't get emotional around her.

Don't try to irritate her or make her jealous; you can't win making enemies in a work situation.

Just tell jokes when she wants attention, and then find some reason to walk away, without being obvious.

[Asker]

What do you mean by unbalanced?

[martyfellow]

She has some compulsion to make every guy pay attention to her. She can't control herself.

[Asker]

It's not every guy...

[martyfellow]

Sure sounds like it's most of the ones anywhere near available!

[Juni_Ayaka]

Why don't you two talk? Maybe she likes you but is afraid of telling? My friend has a similar situation as you.

[Asker]

Tell me more about your friends situation?

[Juni_Ayaka]

My friend is female and very flirty. It was the first time she seriously fell for someone and a player as well. He flirts with every girl but no physical contact but he flirts with my friend give her gifts have physical contact and treats her like a queen which he doesn't do to any girl and you can clearly feel the other girls jealousy but one day his fiancé came and he treats her the same way he does to my friend and after the arrival of his fiancé, he only stop flirting with my friend that cause her to be heart broken and stop talking to him. I was worried so I decided to talk to her and told her to confess or ask him straight and she boldly confess to him the day after when the guy mock her and she shouts what her heart feels and it turns out he love her to but can't break the engagement because of his mother and they somehow work it out together and they are getting married next month.

[Asker]

Interesting you mention this. Towards the end of my ignoring she came and met me in the breakroom and we talked looking out the window, I felt she wanted me to tell her how i felt about her, I almost did but couldn't, i know she wouldn't because she's married. She's pregnant now

[yupyup89]

She's married, drop it like it's hot. It totally is not worth the drama.

[Asker]

I did then I feel bad for ingnoring. She never comes by my desk I always have to stop by hers to talk. We have a work party tonight with spouses I don't want awkwardness so I thought about making an effort but don't care. She stopped by for a brief second to say something, my guess is so things wouldn't be awkward tonight. So bizarre.

[yupyup89]

I wouldn't feel bad, you don't want the whole office thinking that you are "that kind of guy" anyways. She should realize that she's putting you, and anyone else she goes after while married, in a very uncomfortable position. Not only that, it's not fair to you for her to expect you to be all hung up on her. I think you did the right thing by removing yourself from the situation. She'll realize that before too long and appreciate it.

[Anonymous]

this is bizarre, be prepared to get a restraining order.

[Asker]

Why do you say that? Lol

[Asker]

Help?

[Opinion Owner]

I'm just exaggerating. She seems kind of deceptive, and unpredictable. She probably wouldn't stalk you unless you developed some relationship and then tried to leave it. But I don't know. she could has aspergers syndrome for all I know.

[Asker]

Yea I feel that. You think she cray about me? She not aspergi

[Opinion Owner]

She hasn't had the chance to get to know you, so she couldn't be crazy about. She probably has an idea of who she thinks you are. She will eventually write you off if she is attracted to you. But to be sure you could make yourself extremely unappealing to her. Use your imagination.