When people put their arm on the back of your chair?

[Prettykangaroos]

I just want to punch them in the face!!! Okay seriously, a guy in my class, who has already proved to be wonderful at making feel uncomfortable, insists on sitting next to me, turning his chair to face me, and then putting his arm on the back of my chair! Dear Lord :(

How can I tell him to stop? He already knows I have I boyfriend, and I'm pretty sure at this point, he's basically got everyone in that hour convinced that we're dating. Now this point isn't a big deal, and my boyfriend knows about this whole ordeal. He also puts his hand on my back when he talks to me, and I just feel really uncomfortable. Am I overreacting?

I'm SO ANNOYED.

Seriously, HELP ME.

Updates

+1 y

Also, this is a guy that is in the same major as me, and I will have classes with for the next three years, so I'd rather not be rude and burn any bridges.

Updates

+1 y

Could this be considered harassment?

[Anonymous]

simply you don't tell him to stop, you teach him the hard way well first ofcourse you have to warn him and it should go like this "MOVE YOUR STINKY HAND FROM BEHIND MY CHAIR OR I WILL CHOP IT" and show him clearly that next time the teachers will know about him the next time you can ask the teacher to move you away from him and if it will get repeated LITERALLY chop his hands i am not even kiddin so that maybe he will learn morals next time
... god i HATE such people

[Prettykangaroos]

Lol I wish I had the guts to say that

[Opinion Owner]

why don't you have the guts to say he is harassing you and you must scare him or he will keep on doing this because he thinks that your weak

[Prettykangaroos]

Yes but I don't want to come off as rude.

[Opinion Owner]

haahhaah how are you rude? he is the one harassing you, but you can also tell him that you will inform the cops or the school's security teachers parents.. etc

[Anonymous]

Lol! Why is always the ones you don't want to do stuff that do it versus who you wish would? Remove his hand yourself... And be loud... saying stop it! Make it clear and very vocal you don't like it... He can get in trouble for harassment!

[Anonymous]

Umm... Tell him to stop? Not in a giggly way, in a stern voice like you mean it. Tell him loudly to if he doesn't like to listen.

[Prettykangaroos]

Yeah, but I don't want to be rude. I have to deal with him for three more years

[ladymcbeth]

You may have to be rude if he won't quit and you have repeatedly told him to. Don't feel bad. Some guys require force. Fortunately not most. Just a few...

[Prettykangaroos]

@ladymcbeth any ideas of what I should say?

[ladymcbeth]

Op, what have you said so far? And yes... If you tell him you are uncomfortable and don't like it. It's harassment. I'm an educator and we have to go over all these things twice a school year.

[Prettykangaroos]

So it's not harassment if I haven't explicitly stated I don't want him to touch me? I kinda though not touching someone was just a given. And I've made it pretty obvious that I don't like it, basically everything short of verbal confrontation.

[Prettykangaroos]

@ladymcbeth

[ladymcbeth]

You can't report it as such if it comes to that untill you actually tell him.. dont touch me, it makes me uncomfortable... I don't like it... Etc... Go ahead and do that so you are covered... Just in case. You never know.. he may stop and it won't go to anything else. Depends on how smart he is.

[Opinion Owner]

Yea you do need to tell him. Just dropping hints doesn't mean anything really. And why worry about being rude? Is he worrying about being polite when he's trying to move up on somebody else girl and when he's assuming you have a man but are ok with having him do that.

[zorro8888]

Do you just hate when anyone does this or just because this guy isn't your boyfriend?

You have to stop dropping hints. If this is bothering you so much and this guy can't pick up what you're saying then, it's time for you to be blunt. Tell him to stop, it makes you feel uncomfortable and you're in a relationship.

[Prettykangaroos]

Lol well this guy is a creep. Although I really don't like people touching me in general

[zorro8888]

Haha that's perfectly fine not to want people to touch you, I was wondering more along the lines of... are you comfortable with your boyfriend doing any of those things?

[Prettykangaroos]

Yes. But only my boyfriend

[zorro8888]

Haha okay that's fine but onto your question now just tell him very directly when he tries to do it again.
Either that or move in a different part of the class.

[YourFutureEx]

Just face your chair (a little bit) towards him, so that the backside of your chair will be out of his reach.

[Klaatu51]

personally i don't mind if someone does this on me

unless they put their arm on m HAIR... then we would have a war/...

[matheus_mb]

Just say that you don't like it or you can say your boyfriend doesn't like it.

[GoldCobra]

You don't say anything. You physically move his hand off your chair and give him a big smile

[Prettykangaroos]

I've given him plenty of hints though. He really doesn't take a hint. There are other scenarios outside of class where he bothers me too.

[GoldCobra]

Give him better hints or tell him straight up if you're feeling audacious

[Anonymous]

just slowly reach up your hand and push his arm away while giving him the annoyed look. or wiggle away, or tell him to back off.

[thomasjjeffy]

^ this. And do it iteratively as long he doesn't learn. But really, involve physical things like don't be afraid to push him away with your hands.

[thewanderingme]

just tell him it makes you uncomfortable.

[the1998]

Well you get your older brother 💁

[Prettykangaroos]

Don't have one that's around much! Lol.

[the1998]

😂 i know its not funny but you must have dealt with weird guys in the past

[the1998]

I wish my sister was here to help she's a bartender she'd know but Anyway good luck

[Prettykangaroos]

Yeah, but since I have classes with him from the next few years I don't want to be too rude

[the1998]

😂 reminds me of that song why you gotta be so rude but I don't know the guy but im sure you'll figure it out i bet your a smart cookie🍪