How to tell if people are joking if they confess to you?

[Anonymous]

Whenever I’ve been on calls with some of my friend’s friends, we sometimes have a deep conversation while off of calls and talk about topics we both find interesting. In most cases we just get on good and never really start to be friends, but all of the men that seem to want to have a good friendship with me ask me sometime later if they ‘like’ me. I was never sure how to answer this question in the past, so I just said we’d get along as good friends. All the (few) times that has happened, we never seemed to keep in touch. I’m not attractive, ( well, nobody has told me their opinion on my appearance, so…) and they have all seen me in real life as well. Are they joking with me or are they serious? Is there any way to tell so over text? Thank you for reading!!

[SueShe]

You can actually use this general rule of thumb.

If a guy, after you tell him that you are nothing more than just friends, does no longer contact you, it simply means that he only saw you as an additional target for his trophy list, another potential addition to his body count. He simply realizes that continuing to hunt for you and being "understanding" with you does not bring him any further.

Those are the "friends" you have to avoid at all cost because they are the fake friends that are only interested in getting into your pants.

They are kind of joking about their true feelings because they only see you as a person to have fun with. You fail to give them their fun by remaining platonic acquaintances (not friends). Real friends don't put conditions to their friendship. Those are toxic acquaintances at best.

[BUSTER21]

The reply provided by SueShe has put the pair bonding ritual in a negative contex, and that is where the true toxicity lies. There are many people that will drift in and out of your circle for one reason or other. This young man came into your life, like many. You interacted with each other. That getting to know you process, and all that goes with it. You may have like him as a friend but he may have liked you romantically, which is natural, good, and there is nothing wrong with that. Maybe he tried to date you, you never said. But if you werent feeling it, and made it clear, which is also good. Then he did what a young gentleman should do. Tips his hat and moves on. Both of you indifferent, and no one with any hard feelings. Now, Im giving you the benefit that you are a good authentic, real young lady. There are many unscrupulous and scandlous young women that would string him along with a shred of attention here and there, maybe for dinners or drinks at a club. But that only wastes the mans time and money. Plus, you as a platonic friend would be consuming time and resources that should be spent by him to find or have a girlfriend. You did the decent thing, and so did he. Now, if in the future things change and time has improved him and made him more suitable to your liking, and you meet again, then you can move forwards with romance without any bad history fucking things up. Unfortunately most women like attention from men for validation, and dont value the mens time or efforts. Thats when shit gets fucked up and "toxic"

[Unit1]

High school kids are generally not to be taken seriously. Had it once, where 2 stupid girls came to me and told me "she likes you" and points at the other but the other one said "no, she's lying. don't listen to her, she's dumb".

Meh

[Iron_Man]

All males think about sex what do you think they’re gonna say eventually do you like them

[mommymommy]

There's always a little bit of truth, in every joke

[Anonymous]

You know if you know someone well enough.

[In_Trance]

There's truth in every joke