Is it strange to be invited to the bachelorette party but not to the wedding?

[Miss_Behave]

I hear that they're having a very small wedding, which is fine. But I was still very surprised to get an invitation to the bachelorette party.
Maybe this isn't out of the ordinary but it sure is out of the ordinary to me and a first time for me, LOL

So, thoughts? Has this happened to you before, or have you heard of such thing before?

For guys, have you been invited to a bachelor party but not to the wedding?

Updates

+1 y

So, my friend actually just mailed me an invite for the wedding. I guess she was just slow at getting the invitations out or maybe some spaces might've opened up. EIther way, I was still gonna go to the bachelorette party - wedding invite or not.

Thank you to everyone who responded.

[sadiesays06]

I think it happens a lot with smaller weddings. If they're having a small wedding and just can't afford to invite everyone, that doesn't mean they won't still want to celebrate with their friends. Inviting friends to the bachelorette party is a way to include people in the celebration even if they can't afford to invite everyone to the formal ceremony. If I were you I'd go, and feel good about being included. Lots of people can't afford to invite many friends to their weddings, especially if they have a lot of family. At my bestie's wedding, the only friends were the bridal party. Literally everyone else invited was a relative! It sucked for the couple but that's all they could afford. The bachelorette and wedding shower were her only chance to celebrate with her friends - the people she's actually close to!! It would have broken her heart if someone didn't come to her bachelorette and shower just because they weren't invited to the wedding ceremony. The parties are where you want your true friends, to party with you and make memories that last a lifetime!

[LaurenGrace]

weddings are public events anyone is welcome to attend. however its the reception that the wedded couple are inviting you to.
I've had clients who have had big stag and hens parties but only wedd in front of their 2 witnesses.
I've had clients that invited people to the ceremony but not reception..
it really is their choice to do what suits best for them.
she may only be having a small wedding or and things like location and accemedation and cost play into those factors where only their nearest and dearest get invited. enjoy the hens party get wild chick 😇

[Miss_Behave]

Yea, bachelorette parties are fun. In fact, I usually enjoy those waaaay more than the actual wedding itself (Read: Uptight; Not really my scene).

[Wonderer89]

For small weddings this hasn't been uncommon in my circle. As everyone pays for themselves it's a great way for more people to celebrate with the bride with no added expense. Most people I know have paid for their own wedding and at $90p/p minimum it all adds up.
I have no problem with being invited to the hens only, especially when I know how hard it can be financially. Just happy to celebrate with my friend 😊

[Miss_Behave]

That makes sense.
Yea, bachelorette parties are fun... More fun than the actual wedding, in my opinion.
It was just a bit unusual to me because this is the first time I've experienced this.

[Wonderer89]

They definitely can be! I've been to a few awkward ones though haha
Times are changing, I've been to weddings where I was only invited to the reception and not the ceremony (and vice versa). At first I was really offended but after getting married myself I sort of understood it, and just adjust my gift limit to what part I'm going to

[Miss_Behave]

Adjusting the gift limit based on what part you're going... that's a very good tip to bear in mind!
Thank you :) Never thought of that before.

[ambertaylor]

A little unusual but maybe she doesn't think the wedding is your thing but the bachellorette is? Weddings are more sensual and if you aren't close maybe she doesn't feel it's necessary to invite you but still wants you to be a part of the party. The bachellorette party is the best bit! Enjoy! If all goes well she might invite you to the wedding too after spending more time together.

[Miss_Behave]

Yep, bachelorette parties are fun and I usually enjoy waaay more than the actual wedding itself.

[Streamhopper]

That's a touch on the strange side, I agree. Usually that kind of thing (in my primeval male mind) is reserved for only the closest (and thus usually invited) wedding party girls. And no, that's never happened to me and I've been to several weddings.

[coolbreeze]

It's not strange. I gotten bachelor invites from guys I didn't even know them. But no wedding invite. They do that to make money at the parties because they charge for tickets and do raffles to make money.

[Miss_Behave]

Makes sense.

[coolbreeze]

If you do decide to go have fun. 😃

[coolbreeze]

That is great news you got invited to the wedding. Have fun and update if you had a great time at both or not?

[Brokenheartedx]

If wedding ceromony is in a church they can't stop you from going to watch them exchange vows..
If it's for reception and its small maybe they can't afford to invite everyone.. or only hired a small venue that only allows a certain amount of people, they going to invite their family over their friends I'm afraid..
Just enjoy the hen party instead they are more fun

[ssilver]

I would say yes, kind of, if I was extremely close to the bride. I would hope for an explanation like only immediate family, or eloping privately to Timbuktu or something.

[Miss_Behave]

We're not extremely close but I think it's more like a family and family friends kinda affair.

[ssilver]

Understandable then. most likely not meant to be an insult

[dragonfly6516]

Yeah, this is a thing. When mommy and daddy pay for the wedding and forbid certain people, or when they pick the guest list...

[Miss_Behave]

Ah... I guess that makes a lot of sense if you put it that way.
It's just that this is the first time I've experienced or heard of such thing, which was why I thought it was a bit strange.

Thanks for responding :)

[dragonfly6516]

It's not very common, but it does happen, especially in upper middle class when the parents are concerned with public image. I work in the catering industry, behind the bar. I hear things when people start drinking lol.

[SarahsSummer]

Initially my thought was greedy bride, but with your statement of a very small wedding, I can understand wanting to celebrate with friends even if the wedding itself is very small.

[madhatters4]

somewhat strange but if it is a very small wedding then it seems not as strange

[Stripperman]

I have been invited to bachelorette parties and not the wedding. ;)

[Miss_Behave]

Ha, I'm sure you have... stripperman :P

[Stripperman]

Yes ma'am. :)

[RicanEyes]

That is so weird never happen to me. I guess because it's a small wedding that might be the excuse.

[RicanEyes]

Glad you're invited to the wedding as well :-)

[Anonym15]

No, my cousin did that. She had a cruise wedding and only immediate families were to attend. Although it seemed weird to me because there were others that went like her best friend. Either way, I wished them the best and still happy for them.

[Ladyslipper]

They're probably only inviting family to the wedding, if your just a friend and not a family member that would explain it

[Anonymous]

yeah it seems a little weird to not be invited to both

[willwhitez]

Talk her into sucking off the stripper then blackmail your way in

[Miss_Behave]

That's not needed, but thanks for responding.

[catelyntje]

Yes and I would be offended

[Miss_Behave]

I'm not offended at all. Just thought it was unusual.

[catelyntje]

Well I would though I mean they only want me for the party but not for the ceremony like that's a big deal

[NivramNYC]

It being a small wedding is key here.

[SunnyCaliGirl]

No I have never experienced that

[cupidkisses]

yes it is weird