What age is too young to get married in your opinion?

[Anonymous]

I want to eventually marry my boyfriend. He’s 20, I’m 19. I know we are both fairly young. I know that one day he will propose to me. I know he wants to marry me; although he hasn’t explicitly said it, he hints at it very often. I know for a fact that I will be marrying this man, unless God has other plans for me. I’ve been told by my friends and coworkers that marrying before 20 is a very bad idea. In my opinion, the whole point of marriage is to struggle, grow old with one another, and foster a natural form of love you can teach your children and grandchildren. Love is different for each relationship. Love is really immeasurable from a superficial perspective. So why should age be the dictator of marriage if two people can see themselves spending the rest of their lives with one another?

[Cubansoul]

Marriage is a lot of work, a lot of struggle, a lot of sacrifice. Marriage isn't the white picket fence that you would see in movies or TV. Marriage is what you make of it and you can only make it what you want with the work you BOTH put into it. But with regards of age, at 19 and 20, you both haven't even given yourselves enough time to learn about yourselves or what's in store for you. For example: can you afford to get married? where will you live? (If you say "our parents for now" then you're already on a path of failure), will we both work? Will we have children? Am I ready to give up my life and freedoms at such a young age without experiencing life for a little bit"? The questions can go on and on. At your ages, these are the times to get yourself financially situated in preparation for marriage or whatever you decide to do with your life. If marriage is the first thing you want to do before preparing for it, I can guarantee that your marriage is going to fail in one way or another.
Preparing can be fun and a struggle for both of you. And if you both can prepare for that special day (ie: finishing your education, having a career, having a home of your own to live, etc) and survive the struggles and ups and downs, then move forward with your dreams of being married. The last thing you wanna do is not be prepared and stable (both mentally, emotionally and financially) and then end up in a situation where you're spending money on a divorce That will not only tear up your pocket book, but divorce will emotionally and mentally destroy you.
You both need to sit down and ask yourselves a lot of questions before entering in marriage at such a young age. If your answers aren't in line with one another then be prepared for some major disappointment if you marry too soon.
Best of luck.

[Asker]

Thank you. I know for a fact that I want to marry young because I want to see my partner change. I want to struggle with my partner. I don’t want to get married too soon. I am in no rush. Right now, I will not be able to afford a wedding. In the next year, or next three years, I will not be able to afford a wedding. I don’t care about throwing a fancy ass wedding because I do not see marriage in that way. Eventually I would like to move in with my boyfriend and go from there. I just wanted to get some ideas. Thank you for your response

[Cubansoul]

Absolutely you're very welcome. You said it yourself perfectly. "I don't want to get married too soon". Moving in with your boyfriend would be the ideal thing to do first. Living together first gives you both the opportunity to see what your both like. If you can can survive that time living together, then you're on your way to marriage. But that time will also be the moment of truth. He might not like something about you and vice-versa. And if it causes you to go your separate ways, at least you didn't tie the knot because that could get ugly.
Good luck to you and him and it was nice to get your reply.

[hahahmm]

I don't think your age is a problem at all. The main thing is that both people are a good match for each other. You should indicate to your boyfriend that you would agree to marry him, if you haven't. You should both make sure you are for traditional ideas about commitment in marriage. Don't listen to modern feminists unless you just want this to be the first of many marriages.

Check out my MyTakes sometime too.

[Anonymous]

Sure, guys can hint at that. But they are all talk at that age. I can almost guarantee you, you will not make it to that stage with him, especially at this age. I'm sorry... But you have a lot more growing to do, and so does your boyfriend. How long have you two been together? Do you live together? Do you have a career? College? Do you have a stable job? Enough to support each other? There's a lot more things about marriage that you just don't understand at that age... God, if I married at 19 that would have been a major mistake. I don't see this marriage lasting past 25 if you do get married this young. Sad...

[Asker]

You know what, I appreciate your views but I do not agree with them. You can definitely not guarantee anything in life, especially when it comes down to predicting the probability of a successful marriage.

[blank_expression]

I have seen a few very young survive the journey and they are still together. If you both measure up in maturity, then your chances are better. I used to think older is better but it is all about you both. You seem to have a reasonable view of it all, if he absolutely matches, then why not if you have a reasonable support structure.

[ChrisMaster69]

Well I had one of my friends here the other day, him and his girlfriend were married at 17.
They were both in my year,
I know a few that married at 16 as the girl was pregnant.

[Bee-Hatch]

When you can't afford to pay for it yourself?

[hahahmm]

Well 90% of our ancestors should have never married then.

[Still-alive]

@hahahmm thats nice but its extremely expensive now. This should be highly taken into consideration now

[Bee-Hatch]

A couple has more earning potential than they've ever had these days. Expecting your parents to foot the bill for a hugely overpriced party that often incorporates complete nonsense based on the whims of people and their notions of what makes a day special is just lunacy. And if you're not in a position to afford that wedding, will you be able to afford marriage and setting up a life together?

[hahahmm]

@bee-hatch Different families have different cultural traditions. It's not that the kids hold a gun to their parent's heads. It's usually the parents insisting/encouraging that. If you pick the wrong spouse, the wedding is the least of your worries.

[Still-alive]

Before you feel financially comfortable

[VanillaSalt]

100.

[pink_and_inlove]

Anything under 21

[pink_and_inlove]

I wish that me and my boyfriend could be married :(

[In_Trance]

Anything under 30

[taboomaster]

11-12

[lycanthrope3]

Fifty

[Anonymous]

Seventeen.