Is it moral for a woman to spend some of the child alimony for her own needs?

[Anonymous]

Her ex husband pays child alimony that is meant to be spent fully for the child's needs. Would you judge the mother for spending some of it on her own needs and wants (makeup items, clothes, etc)

No, it's for the child only not for the bitch

Yes, it's her choice how to spend it

[loveslongnails]

Obviously, it's supposed to be for the child's welfare. That's why child support and alimony are different payments. I can't think of an exception for her wants, but needs may get tricky IF they relate to the well-being of the child. For example, if a mother needs medicine because or sudden health care but doesn't have enough of her own earned income, it makes sense to use some of the child support money. The mother needs to be well in order to care for the child, so the child's welfare is directly related to the health of the mother.

[matchrestore]

It's unrealistic to keep finances completely separate between a parent and a child. You're not going to buy separate groceries, you're not going to calculate what percentage of your electric, water, and gas bills are the expense of having a child in the home. Keeping child support in a separate silo of funds just isn't going to be practical.

[Anonymous]

you are basically stealing from your own child because that money is meant to go towards things that the child needs. If she wants to pamper herself than she should be using her own money, not money from the ex that is meant for the child.

I feel that if any mother out there is caught using child support for anything other than on their kids, they should be forced to pay back every cent they have spent.

[Anonymous]

if you have a child, and there is specific money for that child, YOU shouldn't spend it on YOURSELF.

[ohsheeT]

Is it child support or child alimony I don't know I've never heard a child alimony

When you have custody of your child and he's paying child support that goes for feeding the child closing housing whatever the child needs of course you're going to spend some of your money with that too so if you want to buy makeup buy makeup it's not all cut and dry that money gets mixed in with your money and I say live life I used to have to pay a child support what my ex-wife did with that money was up to her as long as my kid had clothes was well fed that's all I cared about had new shoes he would live with me when he was out of school and if he didn't have all that stuff I would buy for you as long as she wasn't out blowing the money and partying I didn't care what she did with it as long as my kid was being well taken care of when she had him of course there's going to be a hundred guys on here saying f*** no that money goes towards the kids you can't have a dime of it b******* it's your money too you're taking care of that child and you're doing a good job but make up what makes you happy

[AviatorTom]

It's called child support for a reason. Spending it on herself is just wrong, it's stealing from your child.

[HelpfulWoman]

Absolutely. That's stealing from the kids funds. If there was extra and I was in that situation, it would get put into a savings account/ a different bank account that would be solely spent on the kids, and depending on the relationship with the ex, would perhaps give him a card to also dip into if the kids visit him.

[RainbowMarinade]

I do not support women getting rich from, or living off of, the father of her child.
However, don’t forget, some of the money is meant to cover a portion of things like the heating bill, or rent. So if mom goes and gets her nails done when the support money comes in, I don’t necessarily see that as spending the child support on herself.
Now, if the child is going without because mom is spending support money on herself.
Yes! Big problem.

[Asker]

Getting her nails done by whose money?

[RainbowMarinade]

Let say mom pays the heating bill and the rent from her pay on Monday, which leaves little for the rest of the week, but it’s okay because everything is paid and there is food in the house.
Dad pays child support on Friday, mom uses some of the funds to get her nails done.
Whose money do you believe paid for her nails in this scenario?

[Asker]

Did she spend on the child twice as much as the child support of the father?

[RainbowMarinade]

She paid the rent and the heating bill.
Does that count?

[Asker]

Is the half of it equal to the double child support?

[RainbowMarinade]

I’m not sure what you’re asking.

[Asker]

Is the amount of the money she spends on the child equal to the child support of the mother and the father.
If the child support of the father is $500, does she spend on the child $1000?

[RainbowMarinade]

The $1000 being $500 from the mom and $500 from the dad? I think that’s too much on the dads part, but sure. The majority is used to cover the child’s expenses.

[Berethor]

She a gold digger leech, yea that money should be for the child only, but it not how it ends.

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Gold_Digger

[TallAnon]

It's meant to be used on the child, if you have money left over from that, save it for their future; The person paying should be able to request receipts to check if the money is being spent correctly, with a decrease if it's not.

[DextroShade]

All child support should go on a special card like an EBT card that can only be used for childcare-related expenses such as food, children's clothing, school supplies, and medical care. If the mom uses ANY of it for things like her hair, nails, or a new bag she should immediately lose custody and be criminally charged with fraud.

[Billlewis]

I think it's unrealistic to expect a woman to only spend her alimony money on her child. If the overall quality of life is better as a result of the payments, then the child still benefits from the money.

[Apple1996]

Doesn't matter since either way she's paying for her kids. Either from her own money or that money

[Asker]

She might spemd less on the child

[Apple1996]

If she is the main caretaker of the child I'm willing to bet she spends way more money on the child then what the child support covers so technically the dad is spending less on the child then she is

[NotInterestedSorry]

It does matter. Child support is for the child not for the mother. Ask a judge or even a lawyer and they will tell you the exact same thing. No child support payments should ever be spent on the mother to go and do her nails. Having your nails done is not important and you don't need to have them done

[Apple1996]

@NotInterestedSorry a mom getting her nails done is self care. It is very important for a mother to fill her own cup so she can care for her kids properly. I don't see any issue on spending child support money on nails cause it does wrap back around to her being able to care for the kids

[Asker]

She should spend her own money on her own things.
But you're a housewife. You need a man to feed you

[Apple1996]

It's not always like that for housewives. I've made more then my husband has in the last year lol

[Asker]

Do you have OF account? Lol

[Apple1996]

No I don't

[DextroShade]

How does getting her fucking nails done help her care for kid? You are either trolling or you are truly a sick, deranged piece of shit.

[Apple1996]

@DextroShade its self care so it helps the mom being a good parent to their child. Like I said the mom is already paying more for that child then the child support would cover so it doesn't matter what the money is spent on if she is using it as reimbursement

[DextroShade]

Getting her nails done with child support money doesn't make her a good parent, quite the opposite. If she's paying for it with her own money that's another matter entirely so long as all the kids' needs are met first.

[Apple1996]

@DextroShade it does make her good in my opinion. A mom has to care for herself in order to care for her children. And I don't know most women i know that are getting child support it's like 15-50$ like literally nothing. a lot don't pay it either. The mom is already budgeting her own money for that child. If there is child support then that is just getting repayed for what she's already spent

[DextroShade]

Your opinion is wrong, getting your nails done is entirely about your own vanity and nothing else; it does fall under the category of "essential self-care" like bathing or brushing your teeth does.

[Apple1996]

@DextroShade bathing and brushing teeth is the bare minimum to stay healthy. It's not actual self care that fill someone's cup up to be a happy fullfilled person

[Asker]

@DextroShade lol she is a feminist.
According to her it should be all about women's happiness. If a single mother wants to go to club and get fucked but doesn't have money she should use the child support money because according to this feminist and many feminists a woman's happiness should be put above children's needs.

[Apple1996]

I'm not a feminist. And I don't support anyone going to the club especially parents

[artgorgeous]

So, father pays $1500 monthly and child wants to go to a sports section - nope, because mama needs new pedicure, manicure, new high-heels and a new purse. So, sorry, dear child, here is your ice-cream, next month you'll get another one.

[Apple1996]

@artgorgeous most moms spend more then 1500 on their kid a month and are still expected to do all the cargiving... it's still her money to spend

[KingOfMe1]

@marish01 @DextroShade @NotInterestedSorry I think you guys are misinterpreting her. From everything I read, you are all in agreement with her.

[artgorgeous]

I gave an example of how the money can be misused and spent on herself instead of a child. She cannot spend these money on herself, period. All amount must be spent on a child.

[Apple1996]

@artgorgeous and if she has already spent all of her own money on the child then gets the child support isn't it okay for her to repay herself? It's basic budgeting.
Personally if I was in that situation I would not rely on the child support to pay for the kids and would handle it myself cuz you never know if the dad will follow through with paying it or not

[Apple1996]

@KingOfMe1 exactly they are

[artgorgeous]

If she spent exact amount of her own money as provided by alimony, then it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter from which bucket the money are taken from. What matters is the amount spent on a child (which must be exact as alimony).

[DextroShade]

In that case it would be more responsible and prudent to save that money for your kid's future instead of wasting it on your fucking nails that nobody but you gives a damn about.

[artgorgeous]

Of course, if she has a plan to save some money from the alimony for future child aducation, etc. It also makes sense.

[Apple1996]

@DextroShade not sure why you have a issue with nails. If they have a daughter they could be going to do nails together as a bonding activity

[DextroShade]

It's not about nails specifically, it's that it is an entirely frivolous expense that doesn't benefit the children in any way. It would be just as bad if a single father blew his money on Jordans or game lootboxes instead of spending it to care for his kids.

[Apple1996]

@DextroShade there isn't a problem with a dad doing those things if he can afford it

[Asker]

She should spend her money on the child too not just the child support of the father. She is a parent too.
What makes you a non feminist? Lol

So according to you if she doesn't take care of her LOOKS she won't take care of the child. Doesn't this make her a shitty mother?
I quote you
"its self care so it helps the mom being a good parent to their child."

And how do you earn more than your husband if you don't even work? Lol

[Apple1996]

It's not about looks. It's self care. Everyone's self care looks different.
And to answer your questions.
I don't believe in equality so I'm not a feminist.
I make money by being a reseller. Wouldn't say its a job. More something I do on the side for fun

[Asker]

Doing nails gas nothing to do with looks? Lol

[Asker]

So you earn more than your husband does?

[Apple1996]

Sometimes yes. Recently had to sell a lot of things since I'm moving. My husband doesn't make a lot so really means nothing by saying that

[Asker]

So in case you divorce you won't take sone of his money?

[Apple1996]

If we divorced he's already willing to give me all his money since I'd have to care for kids

[Asker]

All his money?
Would you give to your kidd all your money?
I see why you don't like equality.
If he is not your husband then he should starve.
No wonder only a doormat would want to marry you.

[Anonymous]

Child support? Absolutely! If we aren’t together and I have to pay child support, I’m not paying for your lifestyle. This money is not for you. It’s strictly for the child and his/her needs. You are a grown woman, if you want something, you work for it like everyone else. Courts don’t give a fuck about keeping women accountable in these situations. So most women get away with this shit anyways. It’s pathetic.

[artgorgeous]

Looks like a decent business plan - give birth to 6 children from 6 different fathers and get alimony. You think there are no women like this? Believe me there are, and lots of them.

[inhua]

there should be a law that requires any child support spending to come with receipts

[Astarlessnightsky]

Its not possible to make a difference between money of different sources.

[KrakenAttackin]

Alimony and child support are two different things.

[Pudsmucker]

I look at this way she is part of the upkeep of the children.

[AmeerX]

Clothes and food is fine but make and other stuff isn't right

[Anonymous]

What do you think? I mean anyone who's a mom that loves and cares about her kids already knows the answer to that.

[Anonymous]

It is her money, period.

[Asker]

Which should be spent for the child's needs

[NotInterestedSorry]

It's money that is meant to go towards the child not for the mother to spend on herself even the judge and lawyers will all tell you this

[DextroShade]

It's the child's money. You are seriously a great argument for mandatory sterilization.

[Kelly6]

It’s not moral

[LiamJHayden]

Child support should be for the child only.

[msc545]

This should be illegal.

[roy_ricky09]

Where did the rights to equality go?

[Guido]

It's wrong but most if them do.

[strateguy632]

,,,,1st