Is it normal that I find my girlfriend's mother very very attractive (please read my description carefully and thoroughly)?

[Anonymous]

I have met my girlfriend's parents for a few times, such on Parents Weekend, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. I always feel her mother is a French lady who is very attractive, gorgeous, elegant, pretty, sweet, etc. To be honest, she is one of the most beautiful lady I have ever seen. Also, she does not look like a lady who is in 40s, instead look like a 30-year-old wife.

Some references:
https://www.girlsaskguys.com/flirting/q1751849-is-she-doing-too-aggressively
https://www.girlsaskguys.com/relationships/q1769500-i-met-her-parents-today-do-you-think-i-am-doing-good-with-her-family

Recently, I feel I might be even somewhat "attracted" to her mother, especially I had a dream days ago. In the dream, my girlfriend was in France for summer break, her father was in a business travel, and her siblings were in a summer camp, so then her mother invited me to watch a movie (not a romantic one, it was a horror, and she was quite scared and I was always trying to make her feel less scared), had a lunch, then asked me to stay at her home so that I did not have to drive very late.

That dream is just an example. I always want to see her mother as well as her, such as having a nice dinner together.

Is this normal or weird? Is that common or rare?

And what do you think about it? Can you explain your reason? Thank you!

Why do I have such mentalities? What should I do for that? Do I have to change?

Common & Normal.

Common & Weird.

Rare & Normal.

Rare & Weird.

Updates

+1 y

I always feel her mother is such a magic woman. She studied European architecture and arts when she was in France, and she is also a good photographer, so she definitely has a great sense of beauty and elegance. Her dressing style is not that very sexualized like many college girls, but in a very moderate but attractive way.
Honestly I miss her as much as I miss my girlfriend when we are not together.

Updates

+1 y

Can anyone give some explanations and suggestions for me?
Also, the best answers will get the MHO.

[buttheadkakakak]

To be honest I find it pretty freaky.
If my boyfriend ever told me that he liked my mom I think I'd have to dump him. Every time I would kiss him, I'd think about how he likes my mom and that would be a huge turn off.
Either you like this girl or you like her mom or you like neither. Such is life

[Asker]

I really love this girl. She is really like an ANGEL. I cannot imagine to lose her.
But I also think her mother is tremendously attractive: feminine, very knowledgable on arts and literature, good on choosing clothes, good temper, mature, loving her children, etc.
Honestly she is truly a perfect woman.

[buttheadkakakak]

I'm sorry I couldn't stand it if my boyfriend thought that about my mom

[Asker]

Why? Isn't it a very normal for a boy to feel a mature woman to be beautiful and attractive? And isn't it flattering if a boyfriend tells his girlfriend that her mother is almost perfect?

[buttheadkakakak]

No it isn't.
It would be flattering if you weren't attracted to your girlfriend's mom.
I don't know about the other girls, but if I found out my boyfriend had dreams about my mom I would be freaked out.

[Asker]

But it is just a dream of watching movie and having dinner though. Is it that terrible?

[buttheadkakakak]

Not terrible but still creepy

[Asker]

Then do you have any advice of how to reduce such an emotion on her mother?

[buttheadkakakak]

Quit hanging out with her.
I mean, she's your girlfriends mom. This is abnormal af

[Asker]

What about the mental side? I seldom have a chance to physically hang out with her, neither with her alone not with her and my girlfriend.
I just always think about her.

[buttheadkakakak]

I think you just need to leave the situation behind.
Her mom is going to be a problem - maybe it already is. You think your girl's MOM is attractive. Her mom. Think about that. The one who birthed your girlfriend - you think she's attractive and you're dating her daughter.
You're borderline obsessed with her mom. You sound like you want to fuck her mom more than you want to fuck her. It's creepy. It's weird. It will ruin your relationship.
Think about her girl or dump her. Her mom is not an option.

[Asker]

I am not saying I want a romantic relationship with her mother. I love my girlfriend. However, I always want to be cared by her mother very much, possibly because I had bad experiences in school before I came to the USA and my mother never seriously listened to me.
I never wanted to have something such as sex with her mother, but yes, sometimes I want to hug her and kiss her like to my own mother. She is so beautiful, and she is like a perfect mother.
I am satisfied with my girlfriend, but her motherliness is a character other than girlfriend. Maybe her attraction includes very little sexual elements, but I am mainly attracted to her motherliness.

[buttheadkakakak]

Guy, it's still creepy how strong your feelings are for your girls mom.

Find maternal comfort another way.

[peachblossomluck]

French women aren't insecure about getting older like American women. We become even sexier and more sure of ourselves with age. When someone feels so comfortable with themselves like this and comes from such a romantic culture it's very attractive. Maybe you'd like me too? ;)

[Asker]

LOL, I do not know you though. But yes, I am very attracted to French girls.

[peachblossomluck]

Notice I had the confidence to flirt with you though.

[Bliss-taylor]

I don't think it's normal to the extent you feel for her mother. It seems to me like you want the mother more than your girlfriend. That's wrong and would hurt your girlfriend. I wouldn't be able to be with someone who thought that way about my mother.

[Asker]

Then do you have any advice or suggestions regarding what I should do?

[Bliss-taylor]

You're not going to like my advice. Try to get over it. See less of the mother and move on. You can't have her she's a married woman. If that doesn't work then maybe break if off with your girlfriend and find someone that is more like her mother. You shouldn't stay with your girlfriend if you're not satisfied with her. But realize that your girlfriend is going to mature and probably take after her mother a lot with age. She probably just a younger version of her. You're young too. I'm sure you're not more worldly and mature than her.
Anyway if I was having this feeling for my boyfriends dad I would eventually probably break up with my boyfriend. It's not fair. This is just as bad if not worse as wanting the girlfriends sister.

[Asker]

I am not saying I want a romantic relationship with her mother. I love my girlfriend. However, I always want to be cared by her mother very much, possibly because I had bad experiences in school before I came to the USA and my mother never seriously listened to me.
I never wanted to have something such as sex with her mother, but yes, sometimes I want to hug her and kiss her like to my own mother. She is so beautiful, and she is like a perfect mother.
I am satisfied with my girlfriend, but her motherliness is a character other than girlfriend. Maybe her attraction includes very little sexual elements, but I am mainly attracted to her motherliness.

[Bliss-taylor]

Ooh well if it's not sexual then that changes things. But you make it sound like you're comparing them to each other. You talk about being crazy attracted to her, that's nothing t normal love for a mother figure. If you're looking for maternal love that shouldn't effect your romantic relationship. That is less weird.

[Asker]

It is sort of complicated. I am looking for maternal love. My mother is not a bad mother, but honestly she is also not a good mother (although she really loves me, she does not know how to educated and communicate with me).
The thing is: my girlfriend and her mother have very very similar style, and the only difference is her mother appears to be much more mature while my girlfriend is more cute. So when I am talking to her mother, I always feel she is just a mature version of my girlfriend, thus had some weird feelings on her.
Do you think this is a weird situation?

[Bliss-taylor]

It is strange but not as bad strange as I first was thinking. Just don't get confused on the difference. There is a difference between them and you should want your girlfriend more. But there isn't anything wrong with wanting a platonic, mother and son relationship from her mom. A lot of guys call their girlfriends and wife mom mom and love them like a second mother.

[sjoes006]

It's normal. She most likely looks like her mother so of course it is no different than liking her sister.

Guys always told me how hot my Mom was and that they like it because that's what I'll look like in 30 years.

[Asker]

True, she is somehow similar to her mother (except her mother looks more mature and elegant while my girlfriend looks more cute and adorable).
But in the dream, when we were watching a horror in a cinema, she even sometimes grabbed my arms when she felt scared and I half-cuddled her (because I wanted to hold back, then it was a "half-cuddle", not "full-cuddle") and said many words to relieve her.
Is it creepy?

[redeyemindtricks]

Absolutely everything in dreams is weird, and no one has any idea what anything in dreams even means.

I mean, scientists are so clueless about dreams that they still unironically quote Freud, whose thoughts about basically everything else have been shown to be a complete crock of shit.

Dreams should be a source of levity, amusement, and perhaps drunken icebreaker conversations. Not a source of serious contemplation.

@sjoes006 Well, I hope those parallels don't run too deep, because by the time she was my age, my mother hadn't been alive for almost 15 years. O_O Drank herself straight to death and left my daddy with all 5 of us, to raise all alone.

[singlebee]

Well after you attracted towards her mother and think of her sexually? Because if you do then i don't blame you... Mature women are hot for sure... LOL

And don't think much about the dream cause it's just a dream... :-)

[Asker]

What do you mean by sexually? Do you mean such as wanting to touch or cuddle her, etc?
Well, in the dream, I only dreamed that she grabbed my arms when she felt scared by the horror movie, and nothing more.
Do you think this is potentially sexual?

[singlebee]

I do you get hard when you think of her or fantasize about sex with her? If yes then you like her sexually...

[Asker]

No, not about having sex. But I always fantasize to stay alone with her, such as having dinner, watching movies, having sports, and/or sometimes even (occasionally) fantasize to kiss or hug her.
What do you think about this?

[red324]

That's good cause she'll still be good looking in 20 years like sjoe006 says. lol

[Asker]

But I even dreamed that she grabbed my arms when she was scared by some scenes of the horror movie. Is that too creepy?

[Anonymous]

I think you strongly admire and even look up to a woman so put together like that. It's normal to be somewhat intrigued by her. Just watch yourself. Having dreams about her is signifying that she's on your mind a lot. Take it easy with that. You are dating her daughter?

[Asker]

Her daughter has already been my girlfriend for three to four months.

[Asker]

We met before. From what I heard from my girlfriend, her mother was always popular when she was in high school and university in France, and is not the type of sexy American college girls, but a woman who dress very modestly and act very elegantly. She is like a queen, to be honest.

[Anonymous]

It's unusual. Most girls mothers have fallen apart.

Your girlfriend got the genetics.

Wife her.

[Asker]

Do you mean being attracted to a girl's mother is unusual or having an super attractive mother is unusual?

[TheGuyFromMiddleEast]

Think about it this way, your girlfriend will be like her mother in years to come.

[Benk111]

it sounds like you want to sleep with her just as much if not more than your girlfriend

[thekawaiikiwi]

1 word: Threesome.

[buttheadkakakak]

Worst advice I've ever heard