Search Results: problems in marriage

I recently broke up with my girlfriend Sandra because I had too many trust issues. I really love Sandra but I had to end it because I always thought was cheating. She seemed kinda flirtatious and inappropriate with her male friends.

Right after I dumped Sandra I went online and found a girl named Brenda. Me and Brenda were a good match. And I usually don’t do well with online dating. Only problem with Brenda is she lives in another city. I live in Seattle and she lives in Portland. So we talked online for 3 weeks until she finally drove up to Seattle to meet me. We had a great time together with the best sexual chemistry. I drove to Portland the week after. I agreed to have a long distance relationship with Brenda to keep her coming back. Brenda calls me her boyfriend. Now Brenda is talking marriage and wants me to move to Portland. I’ve told her I don’t wanna live in Portland but she’s trying to convince me. I do like Brenda and I want to keep her. But I can’t live in Portland.

As much as I like Brenda I know I’m eventually gonna have to let her go, but I’m not ready to let her go as of yet. On the other hand Sandra wants to get back together. I do love Sandra and want to be with her and try again. But I also love Brenda who I know is gonna be gone eventually. What should I do?

I used to dismiss this idea but have increasingly come to realize its merit, and I now believe it explains a lot of the problems we see today in dating and gender relations, and why so many men no longer want to get married or commit. The changes we see in women today compared to the past, the risks to men of marriage, the fact it offers fewer benefits to men now, and the fact that casual sex is so easily available, all have conspired to create a situation where men are taking their gatekeeper responsibilities much more seriously than women are theirs.

Thoughts?