Search Results: need more affection

OK, so I have always found it more natural and even attractive when a girl approaches a guy she is interested in or even makes the first move. I'm not saying do all the work, but just make the first move. Be the one that apporaches the guy, not the other way around. When they show interest in me first, it speaks volumes for me. I guess the thinking process of this for me is that, as a guy, society has brain washed guys and girls to think that the men are supposed to chase the girl and to make the first move and so on and so forth. And it just ain't so Joe (ann) :p. I mean, how many relationships are crappy, end in divorce, or have no real affection towards each other? Way too many. Heck, most. And I think this is why.

I think guys chasing a girl is contrawise to how God created us. But even more than that, I believe that when a guy is making all the moves, doing all of the initiating, putting in all the investing and interest, then it's not really a mutual thing. It's basically, I'm the guy. I like you a lot and the girl is kind of just there taking all of the attention. Feeding her ego. And the guy is stuck in this endless cycle of validating himself. The girl is just with the guy b/c she doesn’t want to be without one. And he is good for now, but she will easily dump him for another. And not even necessarily a better one. It's just 'new.'

And this is what I mean about "why aren't women making the first moves?" Like, ok yea. You want me to come approach you. Ok, easy. Done. You want me to do this and that. Like some check list. It's just so easy and robotic. But is there any real attraction? Or is it just that I am checking all of your damn boxes on your list? Not to be rude or mean. But I am just really turned off by these check lists from girls.

If a girl would approach me first or make the first move, I would feel more inclined to be the man and lead. But when You make the guy do everything, the guy never feels like he is wanted or needed. Like come on ladies.

I have been told that it's possible to make someone happy even without having sex with them. But can you make them TRULY happy if the only thing they actually want from you beyond your affection and attention, is sex?

Exact quote from the person: """You can love someone and make someone happy without sex. This need for sex to have a relationship or that guys can't be happy unless they are laid thought is just one way of controlling and guilt tripping girls into giving away parts of themselves to scum bag guys who leave them and use them."""

I personally think if sex is what you want and it is also what you don't get whatsoever, then you won't feel happy, in fact, you'll feel miserable and eventually break up and just find someone else who actually gives you what you desire.

But others think this is "just guilt tripping" because "sex is not important", and "if they love you then clearly they can WAIT (for a year, or more, or until they buy a pair of rings and sign some papers) because that's how they show that they ACTUALLY care about me".

What do you think? Is it possible to make your partner happy if they want to have sex with you and you don't want to have sex with them ever, with a sexless marriage for example, while expecting them to "stay faithful" and "not cheat" with someone who's actually willing to show physical intimacy?