Girl's Behavior

Loving the spotlight

I just shared a myTake about being the second option. In said myTake I described my experiences as the second option more often than not. Now here is a new take with some nice news from the day.


I met a guy who actually chose me first. ME! He started to talk to me at lunch time and we had a lot in common. He asked me out over facebook, but we didn't even know each other's names yet! It was really awkward and I couldn't say yes to this boy (we met much too recently to jump into a relationship but we agreed to get to know each other more.) Although it was very awkward at first, I honestly loved the attention. He called me sweet names and even continued to be kind, though a bit glum, after being told no to an instant relationship. This boy and I have become some what of friends, and it turns out that we have A LOT in common, more than I had thought at first. We have no classes together except for our lunch period, and we talk a lot in the lunch line. He tries so hard to show off to me with his friend, and although it is kind of annoying, it feels sort of amazing to have someone paying attention to me. It feels even better knowing that this person didn't get prompted to speak to me or come to me after being rejected by a friend of mine. I wanted to bask in the spotlight for awhile, but I refrained. Why on earth would I refuse that after finally getting noticed? Simple, because while I loved the affection he was giving me, I wasn't going to use or lead this boy on. I would not allow him to feel what I've felt with either ending up in friendzone or becoming a second option.


Ladies and gentlemen alike normally enjoy getting positive attention. That's sort of obvious, affection is amazing and makes us feel warm inside. It is compeltely fine to love this attention and to just soak up the rays of adoration, and it is also fine to seek out attention. However, it is not okay to use, abuse, or harm someone in any such way to get this attention, including yourself.


But what do you do when you like the attention, but not the person? The answer is simple, tell this person that you aren't interested. DO NOT JUST SAY THAT YOU AREN'T INTERESTED! You need to be clear with this by the way you speak to them and the way you act around them. You can't reject a guy/girl then walk around talking to him/her about porn and sex and acting all flirty and shit and then act like you had NO IDEA that he/she would take the wrong hint. That's bullshit, and you all know it. This is totally wrong. You are leading that person around on a little leash and you realize that you're doing this and don't want to admit it because you're enjoying the affection all too much. This is okay only in situations where the other person is not harmed by this and they know that you aren't interested and that you may be talking to other people. It is very rare to find someone who is okay with being used in this way.


What if I want attention but the person I want it from won't give it? Well you may think," Ah, nudes/sexting/sexiness/absolute submission may get this for me!" NO NO NO NO AND FUCK NO! Do not EVER sell your body, heart, or soul in return for attention. Never! That means that you're being used by this other person. If you want this other person to notice you, try to be interesting. Communicate your interests and personality well, and if they like it they will go for you. If they don't, and you don't mind them only wanting you for your body, then okay. But do not let someone hurt you just because you enjoy their attention, turn your sights to someone who will have a mutually beneficial agreement in this sort of case.


It is completely fine to enjoy being in the spotlight. It's a natural human feeling. You just need to keep in mind how the other person feels as well as yourself, no matter how tough it is for you to see through the bias of the attention you're enjoying or craving so much.

Loving the spotlight

Loving the spotlight
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