Search Results: i still very much love him

I have consistently observed certain kind of up down up pattern in my real life. First I ignored my actions by thinking it as childish but, then I started to observe a certain pattern. My grades were falling and I had difficulty in maintaining consistency. Even if I succeeded to get good marks, it overwhelmed me so much that in upcoming semesters I fail in my exams knowing full well that it is not good to procrastinate or wait till very last moment. I could not make time tables or follow a routine life. I have planned so much to do in winter weekend and even bought subscriptions to home meditation and workouts but still I could not do, nor I could complete my online courses which were due for upcoming month. Only thing I did was to fester about it, get anxious and watch Netflix. When Netflix series gets over i switch to Amazon prime video or Disney plus subscription or watch YouTube videos or those shows that I don't normally watch just to escape the pending work. This behavior increases ten folds before exams. I know the subject, like the subject but could not complete a single page in one day knowing full well that it can impact my grades. I could not maintain my attention long just to talk to people get impatient and roam in my own dream world like a space cadet. I am not able to make friends , connect with new ones or enjoy my vacations peacefully as my mind wanders here and there and everywhere. I planned to explore France and bought a French learning subscription but the results were same , and so was for Tinder to find love this Christmas. I haven't got any matches yet , but I doubt that my relationship will last with my current emotional behavior. I am overreacting , self sabotaging and creating chaos small things for absurd reasons. and getting lost in memories of past and it repeats over and over. My new year resolutions are pending. I am struck in a time loop of repeating mistakes and not able to move forward. I received advices that I am putting in polls

I have consistently observed certain kind of up down up pattern in my real life. First I ignored my actions by thinking as childish but, then i started to observe a certain pattern. My grades were falling and i had difficulty in maintaining consistency. Even if i succed to get good marks, it overwhelmed me so much that in upcoming semesters I fail in my exams knowing full well that it is not good to procrastinate or wait till very last moment. I could not make time tables or follow a routine life. I have planned so much to do in winter weakend and even buyed subscriptions to home meditation and workouts but still i could not do nor i could complete my online courses which were due for upcoming month. Only thing I do is to fester about it, get anxious and watch Netflix. When Netflix series gets over i switch to Amazon prime video or Disney plus subscription or watch YouTube videos or those shows that I donot normally watch just to escape the pending work. This behaviour increases ten folds before exams. I know the subject, like the subject but could not complete a single page in one day knowing full well that it can impact my grades. Even i could not mantain my attention long just to talk to people get impatient and roam in my own dream world like a space cadet. I am not able to make friends , connect with new ones or enjoy my vacations peacefully as my mind wanders here and there and everywhere. I planned to explore France and buyed a French learning subscription but the results were same , and so was for Tinder to find love this Christmas. I haven't got any matches yet , but I doubt that my relationship will last with my current emotional behaviour. I am overreacting , self sabotaging and creating chaos small things for absurd reasons. and getting lost in memories of past and it repeats over and over. My new year resolutions are pending. I am struck in a time loop ➰ of repeating mistakes and not able to move forward. I recieved advices that I put in below.

Do you consider his a good thing or a bad thing?

I consider it a bad thing because men are choosing women over the life of the next generation. The next generation are the ones who will most likely cause this idiotic leftism to die out. So it seems to me like gynocentrism is still very much alive and well in SHE-merica 😑 Where men destroy themselves for women who don’t deserve it. And claim they do it out of love when women can’t even love their own children. It’s just giving women power and attention. That’s all they want. This just makes my heart ache

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