My boss keeps staring at me what does this mean?

Question

My boss and I aren't close like friends but he likes to stare at me a lot I try to be friendly with him but he doesn't want to get close but with others he tells them what he does on weekends and stuff but with me he won't, I have caught him looking at my breasts he sat right next to me and stared at my breasts, not that it bothers me he is a man after all, and I'm not an attention seeker either. But I can't understand why he won't engage in conversation with me yet he does with others, there's been other times where he would stare into my eyes for  a long time before he says anything so I just stare back the same way, there was another time when we had a meeting he just stared at me through out the entire meeting I didn't know what to think does he dislike me I don't know

oneforthetruth · Accepted Answer

My god girl, you have just described my exact problem, in almost every detail, and I am not joking, I started a new job a year and a half ago, and this boss, who was once my boss, but is now boss of another department, keeps staring at me, he ocassionally if he finds a reason can behave very oddly, and although they think I am being paranoid, both my work mates have commented on seeing him staring at me, the female co worker didn't really seem to be able to make out what his expression was, but the male co worker told me it was a quick glance down at my boobs. The thing is I am short, and this boss is short for a man, and I can't really say I have for certain ever seen him look at my chest, because when I catch him staring it is right into my eyes. He makes me feel uncomfortable, and interestingly enough, I hadn't always felt this way, I was fine with him, he drove me to work one day when he saw me at the bus stop (this was before I started to sense him watching me), I was always approaching him, so proved that I wasn't afraid of him (cause first I thought it was intimidation) This particular boss does have a bit of a reputation, and if he does like me, then I am pretty sure its just a sex thing, but I have thought the same as you, does he like me? or does he hate me? am I doing something wrong? why is he not saying anything to me? and yet knows full well I see him watching me. Sometimes he does avoid me, and I have noticed this, and I think he has lost interest, then sometime later, he'll appear, and it may have been by 'accident', but his reaction and the prolonged staring isn't, because he does it all the time. The other day he asked me something, and had I replied differently I would have been in a room all on my own with him, and an instinct told me to flee and fast, so I lied and told him I was too busy. I'm not scared of him but I really feel like he watches me and when he does speak to me, its like he has had to find a reason, and it could be from asking me to put something away, to touching my shoulder and letting me know I served a customer well. And yet generally day to day apart from the constant and consistent staring, he doesn't say anything to me, he might come and say 'morning', but other then that, noubt.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Unless one of you are married or otherwise involved with someone, I would say it is cause you work together and mainly cause he is your boss.  I know this because I am in a similar situation but mine is in the advanced flirting stages beyond just staring at someone.  In my case, the guy is not my direct boss, but rather an executive over our whole group.  The policy at my job, and I believe this is the case at many places, that you cannot have a personal relationship with someone in your dept...especially a manager / non-manager scenario.  It makes sense because if things DONT work out, then if one party gets mad, then the cover is blown and in regard to HR I would say usually the guy and/or someone in management would get in trouble and have a lot more to lose.  In my case, which may or may not be the same as yours, the guy knows I like him and I know he likes me...this guy flirts with me, tries to be around me, will find a reason to talk to me, and a lot of our interactions of staring - smiling - waving - blushing at each other are done away from the view of others.  At times he seems frustrated, because I think he wants to cross the line but may be weighing the risks.  The way I look at it though, is that I'd have no problem changing jobs (duie to my position and field), whereas his job is more of a career...but we haven't got to the point of having such talks yet.  I hope this helps you with your situation.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I am in the middle of a similar situation such as described in your description and the other comments noted. Mr Wonderful I call him is also at the top of the food chain where I am working although he is not my direct supervisor but still holds a lot of power over my job. We are both married which should be the end of the story but is not. He is constantly searching for me at work if I am not at my designated spot, staring really creepy like, speaks to others around me to let me know that he is there, gets tongue tied when he does try to speak to me all mumble jumbled, blushes from head to toe and gets really nervous. As one person mentioned I have have attempted to avoid him the best I can but I cannot completely snub him either. He obviously is not happy in his married life but needs to go home and work on this with his wife instead of staring at me. I don't know what to think and you are correct in that it is creepy...

I have regained some control of the situation but I always have to be on guard wherever I may be just in case I inadverently run into him which isn't always so accidental on his part. Any suggestions/advice would be appreciated.

Mesonfielde · Accepted Answer

Well, to me, it seems he finds you physically attractive, but doesn't want to act on it - possibly because he's your BOSS, and maybe you are married or whatever. So he just quietly stares at you because it's a subconscious temptation, and there's nothing he can do about that. I was also thinking of ruining his self-image by trying to talk to you, but I think that's more common in people who are 20+ years younger.

DonJuan · Accepted Answer

It means he's a dirty old man, who got busted staring at your breasts.

He's your boss. Even if he does like you, he'd be putting his job at risk if he engaged in any kind of relationship.

Seems sort of creepy to me. All this staring and no action?

Sticky situation and possible HR nightmare.

Anonymous · Answer

This I guess maybe one of the surest signs that your boss doesn't want you in his team.. Why be a jerk to your female colleagues?
Something similar happened to me, my boss did stare at my chest but what made it worse was there was another male colleague in the meeting longest meeting of my life, never felt like a piece of meat before I couldnt help but break down in the toilets after the meeting. I think I was in there for almost 20 minutes crying my eyes out, this was the first time it was happening to me by someone i looked up too somuch. I literally put him on a pedestal.

I still can't bring myself to talk about it, apart of me doesn't want to believe he can be that shallow another part of me wants to preserve the good image i had of him. He was like a dad to me after i moved to a new country. I can't event talk to my friends about the incident because it would be so embarrassing for me at least and for the man i put on a pedestal. I asked my self this question somany times after he did it again and concluded he simply didn't want me in his team. No woman wants to be belittled in such amanner and dont blame it on a moment of weakness, a person in leadership should be bigger than this.
I dont hate him but i also prefer to avoid personal meetings with him, i never want to feel the way he made me feel.
Hard truth luv

fiddle_dee_bea · Answer

It seems that he stares because he likes what he sees, but he is in a delicate situation. He's your boss, he can't have that kind of thoughts for you. How's your workplace? Mine is like a pit of snakes and just looking at someone starts rumors that you like them. The first time I met this guy at work, my body reacted to him in ways it never reacted before. I love to look at him, but when he comes close, I just can't talk to him because my mind goes blank. When I try to talk to him anyway, I sound like an idiot. Since he's no better, he doesn't help me much making conversation. We have a better communication when we just do signs to each other.

Back to your boss now... if you really want him to talk to you, ask questions. Just make sure you don't lead him on and make him think he can get you in bed.

Anonymous · Answer

You'd better watchout dear. He's flirting..he wants your body..he doesn't want a conversation. better be formal with him & if he stared or smth don't stare back ..pretend you didn't even notice. I believe he may do more than looking if you allow him. he's creepy.

KezHarris · Answer

It means that he's a pig, and possibly doesn't see you as a human being. I'd stay away from him, sounds creepy, maybe a sexual predator etc..

xintian · Answer

I think that your boss likes you and wants to touch your breasts...

xintian · Answer

I think your boss likes you..

My boss keeps staring at me what does this mean?

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