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I went out with my daughter, my wife and one of my wife's friends 14-year old daughters. Let's call her Kate and she seemed like a smart young lady; seemingly well-educated, very articulate, fun and friendly. Whilst at dinner, the topic of gender somehow made it into the discussion and I was very interested to get a young lady's opinion on how she saw the mainstream's commentary of the gender wars and female oppression
Stupid me fell for the trap of thinking this young lady was mature enough to enter into an open discussion of truth based on statistically proven facts and the social realities of how good women actually have it in the Western world. Instead, what I was faced with was a regurgitation of the usual victim and shaming crap of the mainstreams; "women are oppressed and should be given more, while men are toxic and should be held to account." The conversation came to a head when I questioned her relationship about her estranged father which led to her immediately bursting into tears and falling into my wife's arms like a crying baby.
The entire restaurant turned to us as the wait staff rushed over with tissues for her tears. The human male side of me kicked in and I immediately felt authentically terrible and tried to console her. She cried for what seemed to be 2 hours and I my best to apologize and I genuinely felt like a complete ahole. I was the adult and I foolishly spoke to her as if she was on my level. When she eventually stopped crying, we drove her home. My wife walked her inside and I later learned that as soon as Kate saw her mum, she burst into tears again and I had to wait for another hour for her to be consoled. And to make it worse, my wife and Kate's mum are no longer friends because of this incident. For many weeks, I genuinely felt horrible.
Stupid me fell for the trap of thinking this young lady was mature enough to enter into an open discussion of truth based on statistically proven facts and the social realities of how good women actually have it in the Western world. Instead, what I was faced with was a regurgitation of the usual victim and shaming crap of the mainstreams; "women are oppressed and should be given more, while men are toxic and should be held to account." The conversation came to a head when I questioned her relationship about her estranged father which led to her immediately bursting into tears and falling into my wife's arms like a crying baby.
The entire restaurant turned to us as the wait staff rushed over with tissues for her tears. The human male side of me kicked in and I immediately felt authentically terrible and tried to console her. She cried for what seemed to be 2 hours and I my best to apologize and I genuinely felt like a complete ahole. I was the adult and I foolishly spoke to her as if she was on my level. When she eventually stopped crying, we drove her home. My wife walked her inside and I later learned that as soon as Kate saw her mum, she burst into tears again and I had to wait for another hour for her to be consoled. And to make it worse, my wife and Kate's mum are no longer friends because of this incident. For many weeks, I genuinely felt horrible.
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My wife was as disappointed with me as I was with myself. I took full responsibility for the situation and although we never fought, my wife and I didn't talk for over two weeks. It was just horrible. I took full responsibility for what I had done, and since vowed to never ever speak to a young female again about anything beyond the weather or the latest music fad. Months later however, I can't help to think that this was female nature at its finest
