
What have you done in times when you sit back and ask yourself how in the world did you get to where you are?


For the longest of times: I'd sniff a line of something, drink and fuck. Until one day where I was in school, a class - after days of drinking and sniffing ADHD medicine (&some other shit) paranoid as shit, and felt like everyone could see how nasty I was. My uncle came to mind, and how I would easily end up as him (heavy drug addict + alcoholic through most his life, criminal, homeless) and it scared me shitless. Went on a heavy binge, decided to quit after - mental crisis arrived. No self medication means shit hits you. Luckily I didn't fall through the cracks, got the support I needed - slowly became someone I recognised again after a few bumps.
Then last year, I had one of these again and this was a whole new experience where simply couldn't recognize myself nor my life. I've (almost) everything I've wished for and in some cases more. And I simply continued doing what I've been doing and thing just get better.
Yes life is interesting and fun of surprises. So much is not in our control. We learn and make adjustments. Then do it again for a better outcome.
sometimes the life lessons are so valuable that I am shock to see that I am in a great place… wonder why how… then I stop asking and just being thankful.
After I got married and had a couple of kids I had a crazy job and was not making g much money. I did not see much of future. I tried so hard to put myself through college only to have to drop out because I ran out of money. If a car hopped the curb I may not have tried very hard to jump out of the way
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I feel fortunate... I smile to that
Taken another shot.
Everyday.
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