I just had a conversation with my friend about this.
I think it's great for a girl to show a competitive spirit because it shows she's got a good relationship with her dad or other male figure in her life. So she has an idea about men and how to communicate well with them.
To be competitive means you have to self reflect upon yourself. "what am I doing good, what am I doing wrong, what does it take to get better and how is he/she beating me." Then to be able to pull through and change what you're doing to improve is also a great life skill. Not only does that help you in the sport or your career, it helps in a relationship as well.
In a relationship two people are growing, that self awareness, betterment mentality and ability to change and adapt is very vital for a relationship to work out.
Do I feel emasculated? Maybe if I was a wuss bag. Obviously I am attracted to competitive girls, I love a challenge.
Honestly I think its cool to be around ambitious, exciting, active, brave women. So in general, its awesome.
That said, if she's "competitive" in the form that she can't stand to lose a game of scrabble now and again, I might look for someone a little more balanced.
Finally, if it was something I was really good at, and really working hard at, and she surpassed me, I bet my ego would take quite a hit. I don't think that's happened to me quite yet, but if it did I'm not sure I would love it. But I would at least try to be mature about it.
I remember hearing an interview with Ray Knight (MLB 3rd baseman) who was also totally into and good at golf since he was a kid. Well, he chose to marry Nancy Lopez (one of the greatest women golfers ever) and could never beat her. But he learned to cope, apparently :)
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It's great to be competitive in sports, games, and a career. But it sucks when you find out that the girl will do anything to get to the top. An example would be using people as stepping stones and leaving them in their dust.
I think it's only attractive if the woman is competitive and has great team spirit. If they're a one-woman show its kind of a turn off.
If you can picture this. If a woman is playing a game and a player on her team messes up. Does she 1. talk to the player and help them figure out what they did wrong? Or 2. criticize them and talk about them behind their back?
Number 2 is very unattractive and gives me the impression they wouldn't make a good mother in the future.
I would love it if my spouse, or girlfriend was into sports. Most girls I have dated could care less about sports, where I was always involved in team sports. They never showed any interest, and it bothered me a bit.
Because of my past experiences, I would "welcome" a challenge and it would add a lot to the relationship. I would rather play sports, than say, pottery together, but her wanting to play sports, I still would take pottery because of how happy her interest in sports would make me.
As long as she's not over the top competitive, a little spirit would add excitement to the relationship.
I'd say I enjoy it. It means that there's quite a bit more to her. She's less likely to be someone that can be walked all over, and that's always good. If she's fit and healthy, so much the better.
Emasculated? I don't think it affects me in that way. I don't base my feelings about myself based on what others think of me, or on what they're doing.
I challenge the competition in any form. As a married man, I welcome my lady to be my equal. If I was single, at least for a short while I would want to date Brit Spears, but her craziness would grow old quickly.
Well, I love competitive girls...well, not in sports cause I don't like the tomboyish type of girls.
However, those that want to get ahead, and make it to the top, I specialize in dating those! :)
It's cool, and usually pretty attractive, or a neutral thing.
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