Does ANYONE here know how to hook up a motherfucking cell phone to a computer?

I'm TRYING to send some pics to my lawyer from the cell phone and they REFUSE to send!!! We need them by tomorrow morning!! I need a way to get them from the fucking phone to the computer so I can copy the pics from this fucking piece of shit phone to the computer!!! I REFUSE to believe there's NO FUCKING WAY to hook up a phone to a computer!!!

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Thanks loads to all for your help and suggestions, my best friend, Kelly, came through having me text them to her. Once I discovered that option, I texted them to the lawyer, too! He got `em!!
Sorry for the language but, when very simple and logical things don't work and I'm rushed and have no other options, I get pissed!!
Does ANYONE here know how to hook up a motherfucking cell phone to a computer?
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