She's orbiting me?

[Anonymous]

2 weeks ago my ex girlfriend said she's done and moving on but just this morning she's been all crazy over my fb... liking shit and commenting on 3 of my posts...

[Anonymous]

Having seen my friends do this, it seems like them trying to both maintain a friendship of some sort and not wanting you to be mad or upset with them over the breakup. I don't know if you guys have mutual friends, but they worry about that too, like not wanting to change the dynamic. The issue with all of these “explanations” is that it’s selfish acts. They’re trying to make themselves feel better and also want to stay cool with you, but it’s not all about them and what they want.

[Asker]

We've been in no contact ever since she completely ended things. She broke up with me after Easter but we still hungout and acted like a couple and all that, even though we actually weren't and eventually had sex... I wasn't expecting to hear from her at all... I miss her like crazy and I want her back but she kept saying we weren't on the same page... we always got along great together, never fighting or anything like that. I was hoping she'd reach out but wasn't getting my hopes up... but now she's broke the no contact and opened up the tiniest communication... I wasn't gonna reach out till after my birthday (I'm still gonna wait till then), cuz I know a DM is a little different than a fb comment lol

[Opinion Owner]

When one of my best guy friends was going through it with his longtime girlfriend (they were together from 17-21) instead of breaking up she asked for a break. You’d think that with so much history and love (they were even engaged) he just ended it, his reason being that “she can’t pick and choose when I’m going to matter”, and for some reason that’s always stuck with me. Even though she begged for him back and he was hurting greatly, he walked away. My point in telling you that story is because if you’re dealing with a person who’s straddling the fence between being with you or not, then that’s just not the right person. I bet you could say without even a thought that you want her back, so do you really think it’s fair for you accept her indecisiveness? Shouldn’t she know without the shadow of a doubt a well? Maybe it’s prideful, but I would do the hard thing and let her go. Her logic about seeing eye to eye will still be an issue, because it’s only been about 2 and a half months, so no real time has passed for things to change. Ultimately you have to do what feels right for you, and if it’s engaging with her then that’s just something you have to go through. Just keep in mind that you’ve spent all this time recovering, and if things don’t work again, it’s like going through the hurt all over.

[Asker]

We were only together a short time but saw each other all the time. I spent every weekend at her place and sometimes she'd even drive me home Monday morning before work... she always had her doubts about me (she said it multiple times), said I scared her cuz I don't really have much of any real life/worldly experience cuz I still live at home... said I wasn't ready for a house/apartment and kids and all that... didn't think I could step up when needed... it always felt like I was paying the price for what her ex husband put her through... but yet even after all that, I'm still crazy about her and want her for the rest of my life...

[Opinion Owner]

I’m sorry man, that’s tough honestly. I know the heart wants what it wants so ultimately if it’s trying with her again then that’s what you have to go through and no one can judge that. I just think you should step back from the emotions of it all and look at the broader picture. From the things you said, I honestly think she needs to heal, and not make her new partners (you) pay for what her ex did. You should also not want that for yourself. Why? Because it’s not encouraging and becomes draining. What she should do is uplift you, like if she feels you aren’t where you need to be then say something encouraging. Nagging about where you are in life is not only unhelpful, but it’s discouraging because then you don’t feel good enough. You’ll find yourself constantly trying to prove your worth and that’s not fair. Realistically a lot of people in their 20s don’t really have their shit together and not always from laziness or lack of trying but because this economy sets us up for failure. Everything is outrageously expensive even with a good paying job and I don’t see that easing up any time soon. All you can do is your best dude and if that’s not good enough for her then that sucks a lot.

[Asker]

It definitely felt like at times I wasn't good enough... which really hurt and sucked. She was the breadwinner by a mile in her marriage, she was working almost 80hrs a week and she'd come home and still haveta do the house work and shit... then he made her lose her job and before she kinda said how she wants the roles reversed, where the guy is the breadwinner and she can only work part time and take care of the house and kids... once again it all stems from the ex husband

[KimRobert]

If she’s gone for good , and she’s off your mind, then you should totally cut her off from all corners. On the other side if you still want her back then go for it. Relationship ain’t a business deal. 👌✌️✌️✌️

[Asker]

I do want her back.. it's just weird she'd reach break the no communication only 2 weeks afterwards... especially after saying she's done and moving on...

[KimRobert]

So go after her and get her back

[Asker]

It's not that simple between us... we've been on and off before... I wanna give her space and hopefully let things heal a bit and hopefully we can come together again

[KimRobert]

Alright, follow me and send me a message. Let’s chat privately.

[Asker]

Won't let me message you unless you follow me too

[Asker]

Be easier if you just message me