Honestly I’m just curious. So one of my ex’s friends that’s a girl has been friends with him for 5 years. She was like a big sister figure to him and although they weren’t as close anymore he still valued her or so I thought…
My ex did not know that I was still in contact with this girl and she came to visit me for a weekend. I’m sure that was a huge surprise for him since she posted me everywhere.
The friend later found out that he removed her and even blocked her from everything after she posted me. She was shocked since they were close at one point and were still in contact two weeks ago.
A little backstory between me and my ex is that there is no “bad blood” between us however he knows I was incredibly hurt when I found out he got a new girlfriend especially since our no contact period was very messy. I also didn’t think he was over me when he got that new girlfriend (7 months post breakup but only 1 month of no contact)…
Anyways so I’m just wondering if he unfollowed her after seeing my face because it hurts him or because of his new girlfriend. I just can’t imagine him telling his new girlfriend “omg my ex is hanging out with our mutual friend” and the girlfriend going “unfollow her”. This isn’t the first time that one of our mutual friends posted me and he removed them on social media. However with this friend he has know her for years and she helped him so much.
But yeah can someone please help me figure out what might be the case?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
Hmm that's a tough situation. Here's what I think might be going on:
It sounds like your ex still has some unresolved feelings for you, even if he's trying to move on with this new girlfriend. Seeing you hanging out with his friend who he's known for so long probably stirred up old emotions.
As for blocking/unfollowing her, I wouldn't be surprised if both his personal feelings and his new girlfriend played a role. On one hand, seeing pictures of you likely upset him. But I bet his girlfriend wasn't too pleased either, and maybe he felt pressure to cut contact to prove his commitment to her.
Girls can be super jealous sometimes! And it’s hard to fully move on after a breakup, even more so if the relationship didn’t end completely clean. I’m sure seeing you having a good time brought back memories for him.
Deep down though, I don’t think he’d want to lose touch with a long-time friend over this. It was probably an impulsive reaction to an uncomfortable situation. Hopefully with time things can cool off and he reconnects with her. But for now it’s probably best to just move on and focus on yourself! Hope this gives you some perspective - let me know if any other questions come up!
Wow thank you so much! That’s what I thought as well, I just wanted to hear another opinion on it but you’re right
No problem! Yeah dealing with exes and their new relationships can definitely be confusing. But like I said, wouldn't worry too much about what he's doing on social media or why. As long as you and that friend are cool, that's all that really matters. Sounds like he might have some stuff to work out still if he's acting that way. But you're right to just focus on you and not get too caught up in their drama. Hope things continue going well for you!
Do you think he possibly might hate me? I asked my other guy friends this and they think he does because he is acting so petty and never “wants to see my face”. When I knew him he wasn’t as petty and I feel like guys only rlly act like that when they care. But the thing is he has no right to be upset by this because he’s the one with someone new while I’ve just been by myself. You know? Maybe the post triggered him because I looked happy? I’m not sure
Hmm it's tough to say for sure if he hates you or not. Guys can act pretty immature sometimes when their feelings get hurt. And it does sound like seeing pics of you happy with his friend triggered something in him.
Maybe on some level he's still not fully over you? Even if he's with someone new now, that doesn't necessarily mean he stopped caring about you completely. And seeing an old mutual remind him of your past could stir things up.
At the same time though, cutting someone off so harshly who he was once close with does seem over the top. Unless there's bad blood between you two now that you didn't mention. But if the breakup was relatively clean, then blocking people seems petty.
I don't think you really did anything wrong here. You're allowed to live your life and be friends with who you want, with or without him. He made the choice to move on in his own way.
So I wouldn't say he necessarily hates you. More that he's probably still figuring his own feelings out. Give it more time and hopefully he'll mature about the whole thing. In the meantime, don't let his actions get you down - keep being your happy self!
No there’s no bad blood that I know of. If anything he broke my heart and chose to date someone else (the “she’s just a friend”). That’s why I don’t understand why such an extreme reaction was warranted by him. Since I feel like more than him I should be upset about these things but I’m not. He really doesn’t have a right especially after claiming he’s so moved on and such. But yes thank you!
You're totally right, he definitely doesn't have a right to be acting all jealous and petty like that. From the way you described it, he was the one who hurt you and then moved on quick with another girl. That's messed up on his part.
It sounds like deep down he still has some lingering feelings for you, even if he won't admit it. Otherwise why bother unfollowing people and removing your photos? He wants to act all over it but clearly seeing you happy shakes him up inside.
You handled the breakup with way more class and maturity than he did. Just because he's in a new relationship now doesn't give him the pass to be rude or possessive. You didn't cause any of this drama.
I say keep doing your thing and don't even give his actions a second thought. You've got every right to post what you want and hang with whoever without his approval. Just goes to show his new relationship isn't making him as happy and secure as he wants everyone to believe.
Staying cordial is cool but don't let him make you question yourself either. You didn't do anything wrong. Keep shining and he'll just have to deal with seeing how well you're doing without him!
There was SOME bad blood between you otherwise this wouldn’t have happened.
He felt betrayed that his trusted friend is in contact with you — you’re an ex… you lose the guy and his friends (typically) in the breakup process.
What lowlife removes friends?