Girls, How should I act from here on after being ignored for weeks and then her finally speaking to me?

Question

I am a bit confused.

My friend and me got into it few weeks ago. I am a 32m, she is same age. We work in the same place which is how we met. We would always hang out. Talk about any and everything. She felt like a sister.

Got to a point where she got fed up of how I would appease my toxic girlfriend. I don't know what's wrong me and why I've been so weak to leave the relationship that I'm seeking therapy. It's pretty bad some stuff I've gone through with her. Anyway, one day we were hanging out with other coworkers having lunch and my girlfriend calls me. I answer and at the same time, my friend walks over with her food and says something loud enough that my girlfriend heard. She starts asking who I'm having lunch with and why does she hear a woman's voice.

Out of fear of her blowing up on the phone in front of others I lied and said she was no one and she was talking to someone else. That hurt her. She got fed up of my toxic crap and told me she needed distance.

So, it's weeks of being ignored. This woman talks to every living soul. She is so outgoing. So to be the only person she ignores it stings. She would walk right by me looking mad.

So one day I decided to leave a snickers bar on my desk. I would always leave snacks at a certain part of my desk where she knew it was for her. If I had extra or made a trip to the store I'd get her stuff. So I left a snickers bar because it was her favorite.

I ended up writing her an apology email letting her know I was sorry and my sincere feelings about the whole situation. Told her after years of knowing her, she meant a lot to me.

So two days after the email, snickers still sitting there so I just eat it. She wasn't taking it. I was still being ignored that day. I felt like crap all day.

Later that day, she randomly asks me where her snickers was? She also asked me why I'm sad. Told her just having crappy day. Told her I ate it lol wasn't ever taken so I had it.

Soon after I walked away. Didn't talk again.

What do I do next?

HollyK21 · Answer

Hey there, I believe we’ve spoken more recently and I’m sorry to hear that all this is still going on. First and foremost, I think the main goal should be figuring out how to exit that relationship. There’s no use trying to mend the bridge with your friend when the same obstacles and problems are still there, which she understandably doesn’t want any parts of. I get it, your girlfriend is crazy and there’s a lot of drama. This has just become such a toxic and volatile situation, I fear this is about getting out with your life as opposed to just a messy breakup.

Masie · Answer

I am confused. Are you talking again now or just that little interaction that you explained towards the end of your post? If you are talking again, I wouldn't do anything different. Sounds like she needed time to cool off or whatever.

If you aren't talking then just give it more time. I think you should leave your relationship out of conversation moving forward. It obviously is a trigger point for your friend and just going to cause the same thing to happen again.

RachyRach · Answer

1. If your girlfriend is toxic, why you still with her?

2. If you need to hide your friendship with a girl from your girlfriend, that's not a healthy relationship

3. Your friend shouldn't make you choose between her and your girlfriend. She should be a more supportive person. Although I understand her getting upset with you lying to your girlfriend in front of her.

Be honest with both of them about what you want.

Girls, How should I act from here on after being ignored for weeks and then her finally speaking to me?

What Girls Said

Girls, how should I act towards her now after so long without closure?

Girls, How should I act from here on after being ignored for weeks and then her finally speaking to me?

What Girls Said

Girls, how should I act towards her now after so long without closure?

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