Can rich men stay faithful?

[Anonymous]

Statistically they can't.

I'm with my boyfriend for almost a year now, he never said anything but when we went to visit his parents this weekend he became obvious that they are loaded.

The house is wow. They have clothes as expensive as one year rent for me.

I'm not mad he didn't tell me, although it would have appropriate after one year, but I kinda understand.

What concerns me more is that I'm afraid I won't fit into his world and that like said above statistically rich men can't b trusted in relationships.

For me this a very serious relationship I'v had my first with him but I begin to think that this might have been a huge mistake.

[alimahadtheman]

You are making a huge assumption here.

I don't have to point it out for you, but you are putting your healthy relationship of one year in the running to jeopardy because you have known rich me to be unfaithful.

Allow me to first discuss the 'faith' of rich men. What you need to understand is, that as true as this may actually be, it has little to do with your financial status, but more so with your upbringing. Majority of the rich kids end up like Paris Hilton. It's because they have been raised in a materialistic environment, and their parents haven't given them the attention they need, or taught them the morality and ideals they should be taught.

This not only renders such kids to grow up as 'unfaithful' men, it leads to worse. They usually have no control over their spendings, take everything for granted, don't treat others rightly (especially those lower in status to them), and what not.

But all these characteristics including the one you point out are stereotypes.

You have been with this guy, and the way you make it seem, he is very humble about it. He never came across as a Paris Hilton to you, which means he has been raised rightly.

THIS, for me renders the stereotypes inapplicable for this guy. I think he deserves more than your speculations which seem totally unlike him.

This is, if you have never been suspicious of him being a cheater BEFORE. So basically, just because of your discovery that he is loaded, your opinions about him shouldn't change. At all.

But, if you have previously and already been suspicious or unsure about him, then you may be right.

Otherwise, don't let this paranoia get the best of you. People are shocked when I tell them I listen to led zeppelin, Iron Maiden, Bon Jovi and...Lady Gaga the most. People may surprise you, just because most Gaga fans are usually 'gay' and 'blondes' (as most people put it), doesn't mean it has to be true.

The bottom line is, that you should judge this guy for who he is. If life has been good with him till now, it should remain to be that way. You are nervous about something which is very likely to be untrue. So allow things to be the way they are, and judge this relationship solely on basis of what it already is, minus this revelation of him being super rich.

If you still feel suspicious about his character, only then will it make sense that his financial status might have had some influence in it.

[Asker]

It might have something to do with the way you were raised, but there are some people from working families that got money later on in their lives and they likleyhood they will cheat is still huge. So appearently it is something that comes with money and power.

I've never been suspicous, but I'm not even so much worried about what will be in one year or two, but if everything works out, what will be in 10 or 15 years?

I wouldn't be so worried if the odds weren't

[Asker]

so bad. I think it was over 95% of men above a certain income cheat on their wives. That's a lot.

From men with middle class incomes "only" around 40% cheat, which is still a lot.

I like to think that he's one of those 5% but statistically your a lot better off with a men with less money.

I know my opinion about him shouldn't change but I can't help it. This is first thing came to my mind when I met his parents and I can't get it out since then

[alimahadtheman]

Oh lord, 95%?! That's ridiculous, How can you even believe that O.o

F*** no, in NO WAY is money THAT influential in your faithfulness. Yes, to an extent the concept is very plausible, but you know your boyfriend, don't become nervous all of the sudden because things have been the same as they were, minus this sudden paranoia in your head.

You can trust ANY man under that logic, because technically all of them CAN cheat, but does that mean they will?

[alimahadtheman]

Also, stop believing random inauthentic 'researches' like that. The most so-called credible ones are totally trash too. I mean, be rational for a second here and neutrally tell me, does that even make sense? That if I earn like 6 million annually I am 95 likely to cheat? (almost 100%?!). It isn't even 50% likely!

[Anonymous]

Well, if he cares for you he'll stay with you. Are you more concerned that he stays with you or that he stays sexually faithful to you? I'm guessing your statement about rich guys is more about them straying sexually because of the options they have, right?

[Asker]

yes sexually.

I'm not even so much worried about what is this year or the next, but if it works it and we maybe get married and have a family, what will be in 10 or 15 years

[Opinion Owner]

So for you it's a deal breaker if the guy occassionally has sex with someone else even if he's safe about it and wouldn't leave you? If that's the case you just need to make that clear to the guy up front and see how he reacts. Also, has he ever cheated on any of his past girlfriends?

[Asker]

yes of course that's a deal breaker. If he has sex with someone else I would hope he posses the decency to tell me and leave me, instead of leavding me on

[Opinion Owner]

Got it. So just let him know. Has he ever cheated on any of his exes? If not, you may be alright.

[ashmp91]

ok see your looking at something else when there is something right in front of your eyes that your missing. He didn't tell you because he didn't want you to think any different about him than you would of somebody in your own financial area. and you will fit into his world because he likes you and he's with you you shouldn't worry about fitting in or anything else just being with him should be more than enough. and not all rich guys cheat yes there are some or a lot but its not all of them.

[XRabbitHeartX]

I don't think it's fair to judge anyone like that. Some people are rich by luck but that doesn't make them out to be more cheat-worth than anyone else. It's not like you can help that you're rich? Or that you're poor. That's just how it is. Unfair?Fair? either way that's life. This guy has been with you for a long time and I'm sure if there were trouble you would have already seen warning signs. Don't let something he can't even help get in the way cause that's very stereotypical.

[NoOneYouExpect]

Just because his family has nice things doesn't mean they're rich. They might just be in insane amounts of debt. And even if his parents are rich it doesn't mean he is. He might not see a dime of it until they met there ends. And honestly if you don't fit into his world and the future he's planning he wouldn't have kept you around for a year. Don't give up on a good guy without getting the story straight.

[pr3ttybr0wn]

rich men have more opportunities but poor men cheat as well. a CEO of a company can have a mistress but the guy working 3rd shift at McDonald's can have one too. it depends on the man himself but personally I'd rather take my chances with the rich one than to dump a guy for being rich only to get cheated on by a average moneymaker or a poor guy.

[Anonymous]

My ex-uncle owns an oil company and his kids (my ex cousins) are extremely rich. I'm talking, up the wazoo type rich. He was married to my aunt for a good number of years, but she taught in a different state every summer. One summer she came home and caught him in the middle of the act, cheating. They've been separated ever since, the divorce is imminent.

[Misty_04]

Do you think maybe he didn't tell you because it's not important to him and he wanted someone who sees him for him?

[Asker]

ya absolutley, that's why I said I understand that he didn't tell me

[Misty_04]

I see no problem then, money obviously isn't important to him and you are :)

[Anonymous]

you are already looking at him as a guilty man and ruining a perfectly healthy relationship for total stupid reason. You better go to therapy crazy girl and let him start a happy life with someone mentally sane.