She rejected me and flirts with other guys?

[Anonymous]

We used to flirt a lot, and then her boyfriend broke up with her. Even though we kept flirting after that, she ended up rejecting me. Now we've stopped talking and she just flirts with other guys, including a couple of my friends. I won't lie: I feel jealous. However, I know it's not good to dwell on this, though it's hard not to. How can I get over this?

[Anonymous]

She used you in her relationship with that guy. He was treating her badly so she used your "niceness". Once she broke up with him, she no longer NEEDED you and probably didn't find you that attractive. So, now she flirts with others. The only reason she could be flirting with them is to get you jealous...sometimes, women like persistent men. If you keep after her, she'll think you're a decent guy and not just after one thing

[Asker]

well, I definitely wasn't a "nice guy". I teased her a lot, and did all that other stuff.

[Opinion Owner]

"teasing" can still be considered "nice"...it's only not teasing, when you're not nice about it. I.e "you're fat". Then it's just plain insulting

[Asker]

well, then, I don't know how else to get girls, since I thought I was creating attraction from the stuff I read up.

[Opinion Owner]

Don't go after girls with boyfriends. If you're going to be the nice guy, that's the last thing you want with that type of situation...

Be unavailable to girls with boyfriends, they want what they can't have

Girls without boyfriends well, again, if you're going to be the nice guy, you can be..just go for the ones who WANT the nice guy. Some girls are still too immature for it..

That's why you have to talk about these things as you "befriend them"

[Asker]

yeah, in my defense, when we started the flirting stuff I didn't know she was taken. And I learned as I "talked" to her. But we still didn't stop.

I prefer to think of myself as a "good" guy than a "nice" guy. I don't go around complimenting people and being the shoulder they cry on.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, it's OK to do both...just don't ALWAYS be there for her..you want to be a bit of a mystery to her..

[BlackBear18]

You could possibly find another girl that you're interested in or potentially like. Or you could focus on a hobby, sports, job, or your schoolwork in order to get your mind off of this girl. You could try improving yourself. Is there a challenge or a feat that you want to overcome and accomplish? I hope my advice can help you out somehow and best of luck resolving the problem! Happy Holidays!

[Asker]

yeah, that's what I've been doing. Problem is that thinking about her still doesn't go away, nor the feeling that there's something I can do to get her.

[pr3ttybr0wn]

see other girls?

[Asker]

easier said than done.