Guys: Which girl would you rather have as your girlfriend?

[JapanTomboy]

Girl #1: A good friend of yours had been talking about this girl he's liked since middle school. He's made numerous attempts to ask her to prom (including a wall sized chalk mural, guitar serenading, flowers & chocolate etc). She finally says yes. You & your girlfriend of 5 months meet her for the time. She is a 5'5" Filipino girl. 100lbs, very skinny (subtle curves, A-Cup, small butt), pretty face. After prom you, your girlfriend & friends go to her house. There, you discover she has multiple tiny pet chow-chows, does not play video games or likes sports, & prefers to stay at her large house w/family instead of go out, she has a high end fashion sense & a lot of money so she can buy you things. She is very nice & innocent looking w/a nice smile. (CONS:) She does not like dancing. Se went to prom w/the guy who loves her only so she could see which of his friends were single & soon became one's girlfriend. Throughout the relationship she would brag to the guy who loves her how great her boyfriend is. This creates a riff between your friends who do not like her. When they brokeup, she looked to him & your girlfriend for comfort. They both agree to help her & she ends up using him once again until he finally cracks & breaks their friendship. You tell your girlfriend "she's fake. I don't think we can trust her. Don't talk to her, she's trouble." When you did hang out with her, your girlfriend, her and your friend you discover she has very bad trust issues, is terrified of just about everything, nosey, spoiled, whinny/annoying & bitchy. She also is very argumentative. You also discover you have very little to nothing in common.

Girl #2: You met when she transferred to your school 4yrs ago. She was dating a guy in your class who you knew abused her & you were dating a girl already. You admired her from afar & she did the same. She is 5'3", Japanese and Filipino, 127lbs (very noticeable curves, D-cup and good sized butt)Your girlfriend makes you miserable & you leave her. After being friends for years you see she is nice everyone but isn't afraid to tell someone her opinion, she wears whatever is comfortable but nice, likes being w/friends & you, & always listens to you. You trust each other with everything. She loves video games (she plays mw3/Dead Island w/you & your friends every night) she loves to dance & have fun, loves cars, guns & sports, has a more wild/feisty personality, but is very loving & sweet. When together you watch horror movies left & right, shoot your air soft gun at cans in the backyard or play-wrestle. She loves cooking for you & making you happy & gets along very well with your friends and family.(CONS) She sometimes feels insecure because of her abusive ex but takes therapy. She has problems w/girls at her new school & vents to you sometimes. At times she can get overly affectionate. Sometimes she's jealous/suspicious about someone if they have your attention (except family). And out of habit, she randomly asks everyone who they are texting.

Girl #1

Girl #2

Updates

+1 y

Too much reading? It takes less than 3mins to read. Quit being lazy. Would you rather I say one or two things instead of the whole scenario? Its good to find the whole scenario than nothing.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

How is not liking dancing a con? Sounds like no big deal to me. I'm not much of a dancer lol. I think most guys don't really think of "doesn't like dancing" as a con :P girls like though. Though going with the guy to use him to get to his friends? Man that's scummy -_- And she sounds like a waste for other reasons like trust issues. Without trust, nothing will last well.

As for Girl 2? The second sounds better, but why would she stay with an abusable person? :\ that's annoying. And the trust is a must. And loving video games? yay. Though I don't really like Call of Duty games (overrated) and Dead Island isn't as good as I was hoping :( but still, pretty good interests in comparison. I also love a person who's loving and sweet and cute and such. The insecure bit would likely be easy enough to help her get over. Specially if I was with her and just show her she need not be insecure cause I'd never leave her if I was with her. Once I'm with someone, I'm with them. I have no interest in others. And I have no cell phone :P so not like she can ask me who I'm texting hah. Now if at my home and talking to people on the computer, then I don't care. She can ask. They'd just be friends anyways :P

Physically both sound fine. I don't see a big deal. I'm not one to care that much about such things, as long as they keep themselves clean.

I don't really know if I'd choose one for sure, but second sounds better. More interests in common, less selfish, etc.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Btw, you the second girl? Cause given your name "Japan Tomboy" I figured :P

[JapanTomboy]

Well I meant to say doing fun things LIKE dancing. She doesn't like dancing, playing board games, swimming, singing. Anything. Her idea of fun is watching a romantic comedy with her dog. And yeah I'm #2 lol...but I have loads of japanese friends...but yeah. My boyfriend left me for her... T_T even though he hated her...

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Well you're better off. You sound a ton better.

[JapanTomboy]

Thanks :/ I'm hoping he'll see he messed up and regrets it..I think they won't last longer Han 4months because he's leaving for bootcamp

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

You're better off. Just stop talking to him and focus on yourself. Find someone better. You deserve it.

[JapanTomboy]

Thank you. I found out he called me a "psycho ex who can't take no for an answer" which made me angry because just 2 days ago we talked things out like adults. He admitted he screwed up in our relationship and we could've fixed it but he messed up because of her and asked we be friends again while he sees how things work with her. I kinda feel like that made me move on, but a part of me just cant. Everyone says this isn't the "real Erick" because he'd NEVER talk to me like that because he loves me.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

I call bullsh*t that it isn't the real him. It probably is :\ people hide themselves well for awhile.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Also, I wouldn't think that your ex is mature or was just cause he's going into the military. He might be after though. If he makes it through the drills.

[JapanTomboy]

I guess. His friends are still in shock about it so he mustve been fooling them since he was 10. And he was really mature before. He was always planning, caring for me (especially after I miscarried our son) and so on. He really grew up as our relationship progressed. The day before we broke up he said he found a good apartment for us near his job and was excited. Then the next day he said he needed space, then 2 weeks later gave up and picked her. :(

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

I dunno, maybe something really screwed up :\ maybe something he shoulda talked about long time ago, but it's a bit late now. Do your best to move on.

[JapanTomboy]

Idk. Its hard throwing aside such a long, happy relationship. :/ he said he never had doubts or anything. She showed up and now my whole life is being questioned! There's a notebook about everything I "lied" about (my miscarriage, me supposedly cheating etc) and he thought I was clingy because his girlfriend made me look clingy. T_T

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Why'd he think you cheated? And what of the miscarriage? And I really think he's just being immature. I doubt he was ever really as mature as you thought he was.

[JapanTomboy]

My ex didn't make it, the guy who was in love with girl #1 did. My ex says he doesn't believe half of it (faking my miscarriage/cheating, etc) but some things he's unsure of like my brother dying in Afghanistan, some things that happened in my past/family etc. The guy thinks I cheated with this guy at my old school who tried kissing me (I punched him) before I dated my ex & its "unlikely" to get pregnant twice after a breakup. My ex and I were being mature about it then called me a psycho ex.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

:\ I dunno, I just think you're best at moving on. It doesn't seem like any good will come outta dwelling on it and dealing with it anymore. I know it's hard, hell I still am not great at moving on. Even just friendships like this current one on the rocks since she's being a very cowardly person atm and ya -_- but it's best to try and move on. Find happiness somewhere else. It sounds like you really don't deserve to deal with this drama as is.

[JapanTomboy]

Well that's what I plan on doing.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

That's good. Is there something about you that you wanna focus on? Work? School? Wanna pick up a hobby?

[JapanTomboy]

Well 7 months into being together, my ex and I had decided on goals we wanted to do. It was like a bucket list. We both ended up being too busy to follow through with them. So I was thinking of doing them. And I think he'll be miserable with her I think when he returns from his training with the marines in a year, he'll grow up. And maybe seeing me follow through with those goals and happy with whoever (if there is one), he'll feel stupid...best way to get back at someone :/

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Ya, just don't take him back. He's already proven able to betray your trust in him (as in the trust he'd stay with you) and ya...

curious, how long were you two together?

[JapanTomboy]

A week before our one year. But we were seeing each other/dating (not serious yet) for about a month, flirted for many months before it and friends for a long time.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

You were only dating for a year, already almost had a kid, were going to move in together? That's kinda fast ya know. But I guess if friends for a long time kinda understand, still a bit fast. Should take things slower. It'll be better in the long run cause whatever problems or tests come up you can see how he handles it and if he's worth continuing with.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

@update: the culture has become quite lazy :\ in honesty, google is partially to blame for that. There's a good article titled "how google is making us dumb" to read about how people are too lazy to read longer than a sentence now :P ignore the fools who are "tl;dr"ing

[JapanTomboy]

Yeah we were friends for years. We both admired each other from a distance. Both our exs were controlling, cheated on used us, etc. So we understood each other. Even now. But after agreeing to talk things out like adults, and saying id be happy for him if she makes him happy, he went and said I was a crazy, psycho ex girlfriend who can't take no for an answer. I don't understand why when all I did was tell him "if she makes you happy I'm happy. Good luck in the marines btw?"

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Eh he sounds like he's got some issues. Should just probably get whatever stuff back from him that's yours he might have and then just let him go and move on. Even if he comes back, I'd still suggest just not getting close. His loss :\ if he learns it, well, he'll grow from it, as will you. You'll find someone better.

Just do the focusing on stuff for you as I tend to suggest :P it's always best.

[JapanTomboy]

I hope he sees what she's really like because as a friend I don't want him getting hurt...but I doubt they'll last very long..she won't wait for him for 7 months of little to no contact...

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Prolly not if she's really just the type focusing on attention and herself and ya... still, I'd suggest cutting contact and focusing on you and stuff you wanna do.

[JapanTomboy]

Yeah, but its still hard when you friend and boyfriend go off together.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Wait, she's a friend and she took your boyfriend? Cause that's pretty sh*tty.

[JapanTomboy]

Yeah she kept messaging him when we took our break asking why he wanted a break and stuff. He kept telling her to go away (he never liked/trusted her) then finally figured she'd leave him alone. Instead she asked to be his friend, invited him to hang out, then showed him her nice side so he started liking her. As this happened she called me all the time asking how our progress was and saying "he loves you hun. He always did and always will. He'll come back. You're the one for him. He loves you."

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

That's... odd. I really wonder what she'd say. Because that still seems odd on her part.. and sh*tty regardless :\

[JapanTomboy]

Yeah. I never liked her after she broke up our friend's circle. Even before that k had a nagging feeling about her. Now I know why. She's a crappy friend. But she's posting on Facebook "I'm willing to work things out with you, just please don't leave me!" And he just returned from El Salvador last night.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Wait, she's said that to him or to you? I say stop bothering with her too if she's still on your friend's list and such. Block her.

[JapanTomboy]

I think to him. I thought about deleting/blocking her but decided the best thing to do is let them see I'm not dying because of it...that I'm strong without them and that I'm happy. I'm sitting back laughing as their relationship crumbles, and showing him he messed up because I'm still the girl he fell in love with those many years ago but stronger while he struggles with her. It helps with my own self confidence issues and helps me feel like they get what they deserve.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Ya, but just watching it and such isn't gonna be healthy for you in the long run. It won't help you move on. And what confidence issues? What don't you like about yourself? why?

[JapanTomboy]

Well no need for that...she left him. He blames me for it and hates me. She said she left because I found out about them. I knew she was going to hurt him. Now he absolutely hates me. :'(

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

He sounds really immature. I have no idea what you saw in him. And let him stupidly hate you for nothing that was your fault. Just move on. Stop talking to him. Block him outta your life. Just be like "fine, I'll make it easier for you" and block him entirely. All contact of all kind.

[JapanTomboy]

Well he's never done this before. His friends who knew him for years are shocked. But he was very loving, attentive, mature (oddly...), trustworthy and very fun. He's just different now.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

I dunno, but that's all the more reason to block him and move on. He's no longer the man you love, he's someone else. It's frustrating to see that happen to someone you love. That they change into something worse, but nothing you can do about it. Just gotta move on.

[JapanTomboy]

So me and him decided to be friends again because we both care about each other a lot and I said "if you're happy, I'm happy". Girl #1 (his gf) left him 2 nights ago after 2 weeks, and said it was because I found out about them. She put it on Facebook so of course I found out. She also told him it's because I called/texted her every day threatening her so she'd leave him. So now he blames me and wants to tear away our newly rebuilt friendship.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

Again, you really need to just stop bothering with him :\ I know it's hard, but it won't do you any good at this point.

[unleashedsavage]

Are you kidding? any guy blindly go for gal 2.. she seems nice & straight. Girl one seems like a stuck up nosy headed bitch to stay away from

[JapanTomboy]

If a guy that was military bound, and mature but adventurous and so on were to be with girl 1, how long do you think they'd last? Same for girl 2?

[unleashedsavage]

girl two for quiet a long...girl one if she doesn't change unforunately it be a use & throw basically only for the sex, then she be left out in the cold alone again.

[JapanTomboy]

I see...well thank you. It did last a long time for me, but I'm just worried about him being miserable.

[Anonymous]

Sorry I didn't read it all, I seem to have a mental illness of some sort where I get bored of reading huge texts. But to me not liking dancing is a good thing if anything, it means there's no chance of her trying to get me to dance

[JapanTomboy]

I meant to say "things like dancing, partying, doing something new."

[Opinion Owner]

Ahhhhhh. Doing something new is a good thing, especially stuff like freefalling, skydiving ect. :D

[Shadow96X]

Girl #2 is definitely more up my alley. Both physically and personality wise.

[Anonymous]

All I read was "very noticeable curves, D-cup and good sized butt".

Sounds like a good f*ck.

[JapanTomboy]

Haha thanks. At lease I have that over her :P

[Opinion Owner]

Wait, you're girl two?

[JapanTomboy]

Yes. That bad?

[Opinion Owner]

No, I just thought this was a hypothetical question lol

[JapanTomboy]

Ahah no, its an actual question.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, I read the rest of the info on Girl #2 and you seem cool as f*ck. You over her definitely lol

[JapanTomboy]

Ahaha thanks. I'm hoping the guy (my ex I've been with for a year) will see she's still fake and realize he messed up.

[Opinion Owner]

Hope it all works out!

[JapanTomboy]

Thanks

[the-82]

That was a lot of reading its still editable

[JapanTomboy]

Even if it is, its two scenarios I'm studying for my psychology final! Id rather have all the information (I edited it down a LOT) than bits and pieces. So sorry.

[Anonymous]

STOP over-analyzing! :))

[JapanTomboy]

Its not over analyzing. Its two scenarios. Its not only a personal thing, but I'm also studying the responses for my psychology final.

[BazookaTrouper]

Neither. I'm only attracted to white women.

[realistic]

GIRL NUMBER 2 HANDS DOWN ! :D

[Anonymous]

damn that's to much to read. edit it down a bit.

[JapanTomboy]

Sorry. Its the best way to understand both parts and get a good idea of both girls.

[Moloch]

#2.