My boyfriend said she is prettier than me!

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend tells me sometimes that I'm beautiful but last time I showed him photo among my girl friends, he said they are super pretty ( they are I know ) and for fun I asked if prettier than me.

He said " maybe a little , but I love you " - I know it was honest

maybe it shouldn't bother me?

But it does , my ex used to tell me "you are most beautiful girl for me" , and I felt so.

I didn't have sex with him for a week, because when he wants I tell him now " go to prettier girls", so this week we have quarrels often .. we never argued like this before.

I don't have a feeling to have sex with him now, and he is angry said I'm not mature.

Tell me what should I do? :(

[chatheman]

that is what we in this part of the world call a loaded question. a loaded question is one where there is no right answer. no matter what he said he would have been wrong. the problem is and please don't take this personally that all women are massive egomaniacs. they need their ego boosted on daily basis. there is an old saying happy wife happy life. lets look at this logically for a min shall we you asked him a question "are these girls prettier then me".why did you ask that question. I think you asked that question because in your opinion you thought they were pettier then you and you felt inadequate because of it. so someone else happenstance males you feel bad. whose fault if that is it your females friends fault? you expected him to lie and to lie good and to fool you into believing the that you were prettier. in essence you wanted your boyfriend to fool you into believing something you know not to be true. women do this to themselves all the time. they do this when they buy something or eat something to "make themselves feel better about something". guys don't we are a blunt interments we have only two possible outcomes yes or no. we don't work on if but and or maybes. we work on absolutes. but I diverse. if he had given you the bs answer you would have given out to him about disrespecting your friends and not had sex with him in addition you would have been angry for trying to lie to you. so to recap if he tells the truth you are angry if he lies you are angry as I said a loaded question. the above is what I refer to as female logic and it is precisely the reason why men lie to women. I am sorry if the above is hurtfull and I am sure parts of it is but it is the truth

[Asker]

I understand your point but in this case "you thought they were pettier then you" - it's not true, I find myself prettier than them - I'm saying really honestly. And I asked him it because first he said they are pretty.. so I wanted to hear compliment from him too, I really though he will say I'm pretty how he likes me. And as he didn't say I felt not appreciated, because I find myself prettier than them, and he doesn't

[chatheman]

would you prefer he had told a lie

[chatheman]

are ye really that easy to upset. I am going to do you a favor. all beauty is subjective and honestly this is what I find pretty google adorable Audrey. some might say she is not pretty you might even think so but to be she is prefect. no can you see

[gonyr]

He shouldn't tell you that. Every boyfriend should know that that question is a traplol. But I seriously doubt he meant it. It's just one of those stupid things us guys say sometimes.

There are plenty of times with my girlfriend where I say something and I. Instantly like "hey can we forget about that last thing I just said" and usually e just do because it's something I obviously didn't mean.

Take the opportunity to really do yourself up and ask him again lol. He'll get the message

[PoeticNinja]

You didn't mean it, yet you said it... - It's not a trap, we really want the reality and the honest truth but... After what has been said, you can't take it back knowing you've done some damaged..

[gonyr]

But it's not like a serious comment. It's a moment of not thinking. If you want the real honest truth why get mad at him after he gave it to you. You want the trusth but you know what you want to hear. I seriously doubt he meant it the way you think. We're guys. Your thee smarter gender. We say dumb things

[PoeticNinja]

You guys just don't think right away of how we can handle hearing that. Especially, from our boyfriends.

We do WANT the truth but not sure how to handle it and it doesn't help when the guy just says "Can we put this behind us" and/or "Aw babe, you know you're beautiful to me." - Like, how can you say such bullsh*t after saying "Yeah, she's a bit prettier than you." Even when it comes to weight.. Just saying.

[gonyr]

im not defending what he said. its a supid thing to say. any guy should know that when your girlfriend asks you that, you make sure she knows she's beautiful. I've had to answer that questionwith my girlfriend many times and I make sure she knows how I see her. all I'm saying is that I doubt he meant it. If you really can't get over what he said than break up with him. if you spend the whole relationship holding one comment over his head you're both gonna be miserable.

[lavieboheme]

Honestly, I'd be pissed off as hell.

I mean, I know I'm not a 10/10, but my boyfriend SHOULD be smart enough to know that sometimes a white lie is better. No girlfriend likes to hear her boyfriend saying another girl is prettier. We all know that somewhere in this world there are girls who are somewhat prettier than us, we recognize we cannot be perfect but we like to feel the prettiest girl (at least to our boyfriends!)

For example, my boyfriend keeps telling me I'm gorgeous, even tho I am aware I'm no better than MAYBE a 5/10, but I don't care if he's lying, it makes me feel loved.

However, what your doing isn't the best way to deal with the situation. Maybe you should have an honest conversation, telling you felt somewhat threatened and sad, and that it hurt your feelings. Apologize for being immature (sorry dear, saying "go to prettier girls" was a bit off :/ ) and try to make up and explain that you know that there may be prettier girls, but that you want to be his everything.

Good luck dear!

[G_GTom]

I'm not sure what the real difference in saying and feeling it. If a woman tells me something that she doesn't really believe, is that worth anything?

[lavieboheme]

Well, imagine this, you have this tie you just love, but your girlfriend thinks it's ugly as hell. Yet, if you ask her if she likes it, she says she loves it, just to make you happy. Pretty much the same. White lie.

[G_GTom]

Actually, I don't like white lies. I feel I can make my own decisions and don't need information filtered. Otherwise, you never know what's the truth and what's not.

[lavieboheme]

I understand your point of view. But I do understand OP's feelings too. It's hard listening to someone you love saying that.. White lies are not necessarily bad, IMHO.

[Spfofdsoa]

Why do you make so many sweeping generalisations? "no girlfriend likes" "we all know that" you say it as if it's fact, truth is maybe some don't mind, or some don't believe that about themselves at all. Stop generalising and saying everything is fact. It's ridiculous and you're wrong.

[PoeticNinja]

Well, if he lied, you would of disagree and push it till he tells you the truth.

You asked, you get the answer you DON'T want to hear. - Most guys just want to sugar coat because obviously they don't want to have fights over such like that.

Guys are aware of beauty just as much as we are.

I would let this go so it doesn't sabotage your relationship and self esteem.

Have sex with him, make him WANT you. - You should as well apologize for saying that kind of line.

Most girls are guilty as well at some point, even I.

[SaRaEmaD]

It would bother me too ,of course there would be lots of girls more prettier but no one is perfect ,He was honest to tell you that but he still love you though he knows there's pretty girls he choose you .so just talk with him about what bother you and forget what he said

[Stacyzee]

Has harsh has it sounds, if you don't want the truth don't ask for it.

Let's face it no matter how attractive we think we are, there's always some other girl that's prettier.

Although this may be true,

Not every girl can have his heart.

That is what differentiates you from any of them.

You are special to him.

They aren't.

He loves you.

Not them.

This should be a feeling of comfort.

Not everyone can be like your last boyfriend and say those sweet things.

Some will tell it like it is from their point.

And because you asked you have to be able to handle it.

You have to let this go, if you want a happy and stable relationship.

[SunshineAmy]

Well, whilst it is harsh, the other answerer are right. Don't ask questions you may not like the answer to if you cannot handle the response. If you where able to accept his answer, and understand that he still loves you and continue the relationship as normal, it would be fine. Even if you felt a little sad about it, that would be understandable.

But to withhold sex and start fights about it? That is a little unnecessary. From here I suggest you either tell him you would like a break if you don't feel the same about him anymore or you apologize. He will soon get very tired of this, because sadly, it is a little immature.

Perhaps look at in a positive light and be happy he feels comfortable enough to be honest with you. He obviously loves you, and therefore you have no concerns. There will always be someone more attractive. Don't take it out on him.

[CrystalMinds]

You should get over it. I don't want to be mean or rude, but you do. Do you feel your boyfriend is the most beautiful guy in the world? If you'll lie, you'll say yes. I do believe some people truly feel that their partner is the most beautiful creature on this planet, but for a lot of people, saying that is just plain BS.

It's not because someone is prettier than you, that he wants to be with her or have sex with her. He just feels she is pretty, but he LOVES you, which means a whole lot more than "she's pretty".

I suggest you don't argue about it anymore, be glad he was honest! Being mad at him for being honest will make him think it's a bad thing and who knows, he may start lying.

[honeyltsme]

LOL

You girls do this - so many of you punish guys sev erely for telling the truth ()even well intended and innocent and wrappped in compliments) and then get upset when they fall in the pattern of lying to you through their teeth.

If you tell him enough times to go to prettier girls, one day he'll come home to tell you that he has.

[Asker]

yes if he wants he may go to this" prettier " girls, it would be only his lose, he doesn't deserve me.

[thisusername2]

Sometimes, I just don't understand why so many guys are so dumb. Girls too for asking questions like that. I know you expected him to lie if he thought any were prettier but so many guys are too dumb to know that.

I wonder how they would feel if we started telling the truth all the time. We should try that as an experiment and see how much they like it. LOL

[TexPlayboy]

First, never ask a question you already know the answer to or that you do not want an honest response.

Second, you want an honest guy. I would say that trumps your feelings, and you knew the answer to the question before you asked it.

Third, your friends are not likely interested in him, so what he thinks about what the look like is not important.

And yes, you are being a bit immature but it is not too late to change that.

And what does having sex with him have to do with this? If that is a factor then you are not in love with him and you guys should just be friends. Not lovers.

Good luck,

James

[Asker]

"First, never ask a question you already know the answer to or that you do not want an honest response." - I thought his response would be " you are prettier for me, " - and I wanted him to think so honestly, If he doesn;t think so he can go to girls who he find"prettier" and I can find a boy who appreciates my beauty

[Asker]

"and you knew the answer to the question before you asked it. " - how can you assume that? I was sure his rely will be that I'm prettier.

I don't care if my friends are interested in him or not, I care with who he is interested.

If he makes me upset I don't have feeling for sex, girl must feel appreciated and happy with her boy to want sex /

[TexPlayboy]

then it sounds like it is time to move on. Good luck

[chatheman]

btw as to what to do do nothing eventually he will say sorry for "making you feel bad about yourself" not because he is wrong but because he wants to get back inside your panties. either that or he will start going with someone else. this is the great power women have over men

[Passion_Prevails]

Sorry but you're likely to be taking this too far, you asked the question, he gave an honest answer. Plus he could have been just teasing you. It doesn't surprise me that women prefer hearing what they want. But again, he could have been just teasing you.

[MotherlessDaughter]

Well I'm not going to lie but it would bother me too but girl you asked a question he was honest with you. I don't want to sound blunt or anything but don't ask a question if you don't want to hear it. You got no one to blame but yourself. I don't suppose supposed to year ago but I hope you got a better sense about this because it's better to have a guy that's honest then I guy that lies.

[Anonymous]

Hate to break it to you, but she's probably prettier, but you're throwing a fit like a 6 year old. There's billions of people on this planet. Even if you get someone who is *dang* good looking, you could find a guy or gal hotter.

So stop acting like a baby. Your boyfriend believes in honesty. When a guy loves a girl, he doesn't go blind and think that his girl is the best looking on the planet. Who is? I mean, seriously?

[ElleLee]

That's messed up, I would be super mad. just talk to him about it and tell him that you are hurt by what he said.

[Anonymous]

They might be prettier than you,he choose you because he loves you and care for. I think you are overreacting to an opinion of him. That is been insecure and inmature, never feel less than other women around you,you are the best and can compare to you. He loves your personality and through that he see the right girl for him.

[3boys4me]

Ummm no offense but don't ask questions you don't wanna hear the answers to. You've got no one to blame but yourself.

[Asker]

"don't ask questions you don't wanna hear the answers to" - so if for example you would think that someone cheated on you, or someone you know died, you won't ask if this happened, because you don't want to hear answer?

[3boys4me]

If I didn't wanna hear the answer to something that may hurt my feelings then no I would not ask. You shouldn't of asked the question since you quite obviously cannot handle the answer. Quit acting like a baby and punishing him for answering truthfully when you specifically asked him to.

[Asker]

so if someone would cheat on you, you won't ask him if he really did but prefer to not knowing it .

I wanted to know answer that's why I asked, I though I am prettier for him than this girls, I got other answer

[3boys4me]

Hahahaha too bad for you. I would have no problem asking if someone was cheating on me. My point is, which you are not at all picking up on, is that I would not ask a question that I did not want to hear the answer to. You thought by asking he would automatically say that you were prettier, but you got an answer you were not prepared to hear, so don't ask those types of questions in the future if you can't handle hearing the answers. Geesh ya get it now?

[Asker]

why are you attacking me? "don't ask a question that I did not want to hear the answer to" - but I wanted to hear answer , asking any question we can't predict if we are going to like the answer, whihc doesn't mena I can't ask. Yes it make me kinda sad, and not knowing answer I can think if I really want to stay with him.

[Asker]

and now knowing answer I can think if I really want to stay with him.*

[3boys4me]

I'm not at all attacking you. You said you asked a question and didn't get the response you were hoping for and were in turn punishing your boyfriend for the answer he gave. You say you wanted to hear the answer to this question, but that is in fact not true or else you would be handling this in a diff manner. In the future if you're thinking of asking a question that could have the potential for hurting your feelings then do so at your own risk. Good luck to you:)

[Asker]

ok, I though you attacking me, I understand your point and thanks for advice ;) but still I think , even if answer can hurt me I can ask. Yes it did hurt me, but I know a truth at least what he thinks - this I wnated know. And I am not sure if I still want to be with him..

[Anonymous]

Break up with him so he can go find a prettier girl who isn't going to throw a hissy fit because he didn't lie to make her feel better.

Seriously, for his own good, break up with him. He was honest with you, and deserves a better woman than one that throws infantile little fits because she wasn't told what she wanted to hear.

[shibaku]

Might be me but this surely shows how shallow some girls are. "tell me I'm beautifull or I break up with you".

[peace-love-couture]

Stop being immature and asking questions when you can't handle the truth

You asked a deadly question, he responded honestly.

[Anonymous]

it was dumb of you to ask you set yourself up for this

[Jager66]

work on being less insecure, seriously.

[Anonymous]

Ego's are so stupid. Sadly we all have them :)