We do it because we're lucky to get even 1 match at all. I've used POF for about a month. Maybe 3 total (because I used it a few years ago) and in total probably gotten about 10-15 matches. And I"m lucky to get 1 reply after about 30 messages so some of us unfortunate guys just swipe right indiscriminately and IF WE DO get any matches, we just pick through the weeds. Usually swiping everyone right isn't enough for me though. Same with Tinder. Swipe right on all of my daily matches and still end up with nothing. When I do get matches they are usually spam bots or morbidly obese girls with like 6 kids.
Even if all is well, we match, she's decent looking, etc, I'm still lucky to get a reply. Then when she does reply either it takes her like 5 days to reply (and I have to message her again in order to get one) or she randomly vanishes after a few messages. And no I'm not being rude or provocative or boring. Long story short, girls on these sites are super picky... it's ridiculous. They expect a guy to be a 10/10 to even consider talking to them.
You guys need to make a fake female profile and see what its like on the other side and you'll understand why you get no responses and why dating sites are utter wastes of time. My female friend had me do this using her photos, and by the time I woke up I had 154 messages, shit loads of likes, favs, winks etc. That was just after 8 hours. Can you imagine trying to read 154 fucking messages, I didn't even try. Essentially there is way more guys than girls on dating sites, so the women can be extremely choosy. Need to get out in the real world and meet girls.
@Psuedoscape I do get that but it doesn't help at all because it makes me realize that I'm at the bottom of the barrel which is even worse. People always tell me I'm handsome but it doesn't show at all on dating sites. Not to mention sites like Tinder doesn't even allow new messages unless you both mutually match each other and I still get no matches. So yea... I can see it clearly from the other side but it doesn't make an excuse for them to be so shallow on sites like Tinder.
Its the same shit on tinder though. Girls know that if they swipe right they are 90% guaranteed a match so they only swipe on the hottest guys on there. You can't take it personally, go talk to real women in the flesh. You get back the effort you put forth.
@Psuedoscape No I don't in person either. In person it's rude to ignore people so they kinda don't have a choice but on dating sites they do have a choice and evidently that choice is to be super picky. Also even if they do have a 90% chance of matching it doesn't mean that the guy they matched even likes them. As I said, I swipe everyone right and IF I DO get matches, I just pick through the weeds. 99.9% of the time though my matches are either spam bots or 300 lb king kong girls.
I don't know what to tell you, you have already stated the obvious here. Trying to meet girls on tinder or POF etc you end up with girls you aren't interested in. You can not blame the girls for this, its the way the world works. If you want to find a women you have to go talk to them in person. Sure its rude to ignore someone in person, its not going to stop them from not giving you their number if they don't like you. At least if you talk to them you have a chance to show them how awesome you are, where on tinder they are judging you solely off your photo and nothing else. Not to mention a majority of girls use tinder for nothing more than an ego boost to think they are hot.
You can be angry at women because you get no action from dating sites. You are destined to fail on there, so just delete the shit and go out and talk to girls. You know what they say about if you keep doing something over and over expecting different results?
@Psuedoscape Well I already deleted my all of my dating site accounts a few weeks back but I reinstalled Tinder and followed a guide from a video. I've gotten ONE match sense then. Of course she's overweight, has 3 kids, and all her profile says is "I'm not looking for sex."
HAHA yeah man, that sounds like tinder.. I only use it when I'm out of town working in conjunction with going out to the bar. I can't really imagine what any guide could do to help you out on there. I mean obviously having a good profile photo is the biggest key, the only time anyone will possibly read what you wrote is after they matched with you. Everytime I've met a girl on there when I was on business she had a photo taken at just the right angle so she looked hot, in person not so much lol.
Well honestly I've never tried using tinder in my town, I'm always out of town, and my profile says in town for the weekend on business. Its always a hookup and I never talk to them again. So maybe that's an angle, just pretend you don't live in your town lol.
@Psuedoscape Hm I could but yea it's like whether I'm looking for a hookup or serious (which I'm usually looking for serious) I don't get any attention. That's what makes it so confusing. I have lots of friends who always tell me how awesome Tinder is and how they always get laid from it and they are so shocked that I have so much trouble on it. They all tell me that girls go crazy over guys like me.
Well why not try an experiment, you can make a few fake facebook accounts and say try 3 profiles all with different photos. It all comes down to the photo. Of if you have any female friends ask them to help you pick the best one.
@Psuedoscape I suppose but I've tried just about everything and over several years. I've gotten advice from girls as well as guys who were successful, followed online guides and everything. To be honest I think that one reason my just be because I'm black. At least 1/10 profiles on dating sites openly express their disinterest in dating black men. Even some black girls say it too.
This is the main reason I don't like swiping apps. It's such a waste of time and one sided because the guys ruin everything from their end. They completely defeat the purpose of the app. We can never tell if a match is real or not because they ALL do it. Girls are literally the only ones putting in the work and picking through individually.
511 want to fuck you, 100 will attempt a relationship, 20 will actually like you, and of that 20 you might have mutual feelings with a few of them. Good luck!
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