Would you give a second chance to someone who rejected you in the past?

[Anonymous]

A year ago I liked a guy I work with and I asked him out. We went out but then he told me that he's not a boyfriend material at the moment, that he's dealing with some other stuff. He apologized and thanked me for asking him out, and that was it. I didn't want to ask any more questions, a no is a no, so I dropped it and said it's fine.
I know for certain that he didn't have a girlfriend in 5 years and hasn't dated anyone since. Everyone were teasing him about it and saying how he is weird (apparently I wasn't the only one he rejected).
Now, a year later, he asked me out out of nowhere. I was very surprised, didn't see that coming at all. He was very nice about it, he basically said "Is there a chance you would ever give me another chance?". I asked "What changed?" and he said "I changed". I told him I'll think about it because I was really in shock and couldn't give him the answer right away.
I would lie if I said I didn't like him anymore, I never stopped liking him he's a great guy. But he rejected me.
I dunno, what you think?

[btbc92]

No. There is a REASON why they say no. And it's not always because their not ready which is a logical excuse. What's not an excuse, is the fact their not attracted to you, don't want to try, and most importantly your just not compatible. E. g, Christian and Atheist don't mix if one or the other isn't lookimg to convert.

Plus people have their own rules. And a valid one is being jsutbfriends first to see if compatibility is there and then date after compatibility is established. And only become exclusive after you both realize you want a serious future together such as marriage, sex and children. That is at least how it should go to avoid serious consequences. Now if that person whom I had many reject me because they hate the fact I rather play it safe then their not for me.

[VioletStardust]

He did the right thing by telling you no the first time. He didn't reject you. He told you he needed to work on himself, and that's why he said no:) I think it takes a lot of balls to say no in order to fix yourself up so you are the best person you can be. He sounds like a really good guy and you'd be missing out if you didn't go out with him

[VikingDude]

This guy obviously was telling the truth and wasn't ready for a relationship I don't see that really as a rejection. And I have to give him credit for admitting he had some issues (whatever they may have been). If you still like this guy and he's in a better place then I'd say go for it. He might also be in a position to tell you what was wrong when you asked him out the first time. Be gentle with him and don't push too hard. Say yes! Give him another chance.
Good luck. ❤

[LangdaSainik]

He rejected you at a time when he was a different person.

Now when he has personally claimed to have changed, why should it bother?
As long as he hasn't changed so much that you don't feel the same for him anymore.

[aWes0MeNeSs]

It depends. If they only wanted to use me, then no.

[DizzyDesii]

there's only one guy i’d say yes to after rejection. He was my friend in 1st grade and i ruined it by confessinng my feelings. Well actually someone else told him and they exaggerated and it sucks cause i think he felt the same until they made me sound crazy in love which scared him off. So if he tried to go out i’d def say yes

[Alice2398]

In your situation I'd give him another chance if you want to, he was upfront and honest with you from the beginning and tried to protect your feelings knowing he wasn't ready for a relationship at that time in his life and that was very reasonable of him instead of rushing into things and possibly ruining things between you and him, obviously he takes relationships very seriously and wants to have a healthy, good one with you.

[whitehide]

Depends on why they rejected me. Maybe the reason your guy rejected you is because he just had too much going on, and couldn't give you all the attention a boyfriend would give you, maybe he felt that he didn't have the time to build a relationship with someone.

[JackSmy]

Never go back! Always forward to better things!
So he couldn't get whomever, and then later he comes back to you? How is that not insulting, like you are second, or third choice? What lady wants THAT asshole?

[Screenwriter]

If it was simply one date and he bowed out, that doesn't sound like a breakup for deep reasons. Why not see where he's at today? If he's in a better place, seems like both of you will have better dates.

[ShadezMcgee]

Your situation is unique, but me personally, my mindset is "If I wasn't good enough to be your first choice, why should I settle for someone's second best?"

[Moonchild714]

Go for it... He was Honest with you and didn't lead on just to get laid as many Non-Boyfriend Material guys would do, so points for him there. Give it a chance, you two may be it. You may be the reason he decided to Work on Himself and Change!!!

[boumka]

Sometimes it's just - not the good time - to get in a relationship. Better not pursue someone who juste don't want to and not blaming him for his own emotions and feelings.

[Daisy007]

I would say go for it? You still like him, he's open to it now & he realized what held him "back" so if you like him try it out? (: what's the worst that could happen ; )

[OBanana]

Go for it! Dont let your ego get in the way now if you still like him. And it seems like he had a valid reason back then. Good luck x

[R_Cakes91]

He seems like he originally broke things off to work on some issues he has in his life. He was probably able to work through those things and wants to give dating another try. Go for it!

[Gods_Gift]

Try him! He's honest, is not attached to relationship or sex, works on himself and of all the women he rejected before it's you he's come back to. (Maybe ask around to see if he's asked others though. ;)

[cavmanier]

To me it seems like he's not that into you and sees you as a fall back option. I wouldn't do it personally. You still like him though so maybe you should.

[Frankiealaplaaja]

Should everyone always have the correct insight at all times, every time, every place, everywhere?
Or can they be allowed to correct themselves on a mistake?
You like him still? - Go for it
You don't? - You don't.

[Avicenna]

Date him. It would be silly to let the initial rejection, which seems to have had nothing to do with you as a person, prevent you from being together.

[Somethingwittty]

If he reached out to you and you still feel something for him. Go have coffee or lunch and if that goes well make plans for after that.

[yeeeeeeeet]

Never. I don't think I'd ever give someone the satisfaction of rejecting me twice. Like if you say no thats fine but I'm not letting you inflate your ego on me.

[SAVAGEDANK]

It honestly depends on what he was going through but at the sametime if I felt any thing for someone I'll still at least display my feelings towards her & show my interest.

It's your call though

[TacosRAwesome]

If he rejected me because he wasn't ready then maybe but if he rejected me because I wasn't hot then no. In your case, one date won't hurt.