I’m attracted to needy girls?

[theChineseWASP]

I find needy girls attractive. Is this a bad thing? Is neediness an attractive quality or a bad quality in a girl?

[likelyOK]

It's a pattern and you need to get at the source of it. Or at least modify the behavior because it's codependent.

[theChineseWASP]

Isn't co-dependency kind of, in a sense, the heart of relationships?

[likelyOK]

No, supporting one another is healthy, co dependency take many forms. This dynamic sounds like you are drawn to needy people, they have an unhealthy insecurity that's why they constantly need you to validate them. For whatever reason you are drawn to it.

[theChineseWASP]

What if being needy is just their personality not like a fundamental insecurity? I don't know if that makes sense or not.

[likelyOK]

it comes from being insecure if you have a healthy attachment style you don't act this way, unless you are blowing it out of proportion

[theChineseWASP]

I guess I don’t have a healthy attachment style. I’ve never dated before though. Thanks for your insight.

[likelyOK]

you welcome I was not trying to put you don't down, just answer the question, best of luck

[Mia-Wallace]

It's okay. I'd be careful not to get abused I guess.

[theChineseWASP]

Yag talar Svenska :)

[hellacray]

Well it is a good feeling when you feel like you're needed.

I think too many women go on about them being confident, independent, and don't need a man for anything.

Like ok... That's cool I'm going to find a girl that needs me and wants me.

[theChineseWASP]

yeah I think that's my unconscious motivation thanks for exposing it.

[hellacray]

Well I do think there's a balance. Like girls can definitely be overly clingy.

But if I had to choose I would rather take a girl that's overly clingy than one that's always being her own boss and what not.

[Regmorus]

I am not attracted by them at all. But you know, I think almost any girl is needy (and since recently almost any guy too). It lies in their nature. That's one of the reasons why it's so difficult for me to find a right girl. Even if they are all independent and strong as soon as they feel comfortable with you they tend to become needy and grily in common way and to lose their independence and strength, almost all of them.

[theChineseWASP]

Huh interesting. I guess that's a good thing for me then haha

[Regmorus]

Well, maybe I'm seeing a wrong picture:) But any of my experiencies confirms that (and I'm not even speaking about any romantic thing, they lost their indepedence and became kinda needy or on the way there as soon as they became comfortable with me as acquaitance). So you are good in the frame and have good cards=)

[potatoiswhoiam]

Neediness is not bad. But too much neediness is worse than hell