If you have doubts with dating someone new should you still continue dating them?

[Anonymous]

I was really excited about the guy I’m dating in the beginning. He seemed to be perfect on paper. But as of recently I am having doubts. I don’t feel like he’s being honest. Plus the last time we hung out he was being kind of rude. I understand we don’t really know each other yet. But I’m not sure if I should still see him.

[Xoxocutekitty]

I think it depends on 'what' the doubts are exactly and how they are in relation to your feelings.

1) If you are doubting whether or not you have feelings? - move on. You'll have regret later.

2) Is it a single point of conversation or an actionable behavior? Talk to them and maybe they were having an off day, or maybe they'd be willing to do it less. For example, I crack my knuckles a lot. I know its a bad habit. If someone I was dating asked that I do it less, i'd work on myself to be better about it.

3) Is it something big like Religion or politics etc? Sit them down and ask them about how they were raised and why their customs mean what they mean. Don't just write people off for being too conservative or a nutcase liberal. People can change over time, and most people seldom actually act on their idealistic political beliefs in either direction. You can be pro choice and never know anyone who has actually gone through with an abortion, and you can know someone who devoutly believes in God, yet seldom sets foot in a house of worship. Figure out if their beliefs match their lifestyle in a way that is tolerable.

[Anonymous]

Feeling the he is dishonest is a big red flag for me! I hate that feelings and better to get out while you are not so attached. Alternatively talk to him about your concerns and see what he says and if it then can change.

[Adam1978]

Doubt can just be insecurities, if you always listen to it without confronting what gives you the doubt. Honesty is something that can be hard to judge, it requires facts, such as contexts where he hasn't been truthful. And what harm the none honest fact caused. Ie what did he lie about and how important is that fact.

[Asker]

This is what I’m wondering if it’s just me or he’s off a little

[Adam1978]

You must accept that people are a bit off. That might go away or you simply get used to it.

[MahdiA]

If you feel like the relationship is not going to last or you won’t be happy with him, then what’s the point of dating? Both partners should be happy and the relationship should be healthy. So if you have doubts right now, it probably (most of the time) would get worse, but it is your choice! :))

[Anonymous]

The best relationship advice I've ever gotten was, if there are red flags early on, or even pink flags, don't ignore them. People are usually on their BEST behavior in the beginning, so chances are, it's only going to get worse.

In the past, whenever I've had a bad gut feeling about a guy I was dating, I ended up being right.

[spartan55]

I notice you are being real vague with no examples or anything. When women do this it usually because it is shit they made up in their head.

[GnatSocks]

Well mister, you sound so insecure.

[Asker]

When we first met he brought up fitness a lot as if he works out everyday. Whenever I text him he says I’m working out etc. When I asked him how often he works out he says 3 days out of week. He doesn’t show any expression it’s hard to tell if he’s having a good time. He also went through my stuff when I went to use his bathroom. The last reason is he kicks me out every time I come over. It’s like stop asking me to visit if all you do is kick me out. Let me know how long you plan on hanging out.

[spartan55]

@gnatsocks
Eh, insecure about what?

[spartan55]

How do you know he went through your stuff?

[GnatSocks]

@spartan55 haha, I just meant one of the random complaints that doesn't even fit the situation.

[Asker]

I caught him when I was coming out the bathroom

[SashaAMB]

Give a little distance and go on some dates with other people. That way you have some objective reflection space.

[slatyb]

NO NO NO NO NO NO and HELL NO! "I an having doubts" -- pay attention to that. "Kind of rude" should be a deal-breaker.

[SphynxUK]

Trust your instincts. It doesn’t feel right. It won’t get better.

[Anonymous]

That's up to you, do you want to continue? How many dates have you been on so far? If it's only been a couple, and you're undecided, yes give it another date or two, but don't let it go too long.

[MannMitAntworten]

No. Doubt is the conscience telling you to continue your search elsewhere.

[Asker]

🤔, it’s could be. I don’t know what it is but there is something going on which is giving me doubts. I feel like he is holding back and I don’t feel the need to chase anyone.

[MannMitAntworten]

You sound like you are wish to walk. Do so. I would.

[Anonymous]

if you have doubts your car will make it to work, would you still drive it?

[lucyloo76]

Why not. You can go and judge if your fears are grounded...

[Wise4myage]

Maybe. But give the guy a chance and if he's rude to you again, than call him on it.

[Asker]

I’m open to figure out if I really like him or not

[Wise4myage]

That's all he, or anyone else can ask of you.

[KrakenAttackin]

Sounds like you got him and now you are bored with him.

[Asker]

I am a little, he’s really boring. I think he doesn’t really get women even though he’s really attractive. I’m trying to figure out if he’s a man boy or not. He hasn’t reach out in 4 days so I haven’t had to worry about him.

[KrakenAttackin]

He may have become bored with you as well.

[Asker]

Maybe who knows

[Uptowngirl88]

If he's rude to you why would you want to continue to see him?

[Uptowngirl88]

Obviously he doesn't respect you

[Twalli]

Well since you don't really know each other yet I don't think you can know if you want to yet.

[TITAN-IDC]

What's the event that he was dishonest about? Your being vague..

[Jamie05rhs]

You're gonna have to be more specific than that.

[MasterOfReality]

No. Always go with your instincts. Your gut.

[melisa53]

No girl