I Keep Leaving because Nothing Changes, How Can I Fix Things?

[Anonymous]

I've been dating this guy for 6 months now~ we live off grid & the living situation is kinda rough. He's been saying for weeks that he's gonna hook up the washer/dryer & finish the shower. That its really easy.. but then he just doesn't. I've broken down to him cuz I dont shower for days & feel gross. Sometimes I get mad & ask him why he tells me something & doesn't follow through. I dont try to make him feel bad but me expressing my feelings upsets him. I've been going to my moms, or my friends recenly so I can shower & take care of myself. Tonight when I left he said its getting easier watching me leave. Im really bummed & just would like some advice... it seems like he's just lost all motivation.

[SueShe]

He has lost his motivation and he is also willing to let you go. That seems obvious.

Either you stick to what you say but you don't menace to do things and then don't act upon them. That indicates that you are weak and that he can basically do whatever he wants with you.

You have a number of choices to try to have things change

1. You take your own laundry (not his) to a laundromat or to your relatives. Once he runs out of fresh clothes, he will react and hook up the washer/dryer.

2. You ask him to pay for your shower in a motel.

3. You don't do any house chores until everything is fixed.

However, your best bet is just to move away and look for someone that is more considerate and takes your needs for something serious. If you keep giving in, nothing will ever change.

[neuroendocrinology]

He has checked out of life, a Sabbatical if you will. Unless you wish to check out completely also, Return to the 21st century. Winter is Coming, then Spring, Summer, thus staying you're bound for a Fall. GL

[NathanDavis]

do you mean how to fix things around the house by yourself? or to trying to fix things with this deadbeat guy?

[boggboss]

Mwh u keep leaving so he is now use to it what do u expect to happen when he is no longer scared

[Asker]

I dont leave all the time.. just so I can actually take a shower & take care of myself. Is that wrong?

[boggboss]

Well no but for him clearly he feels a type of way about it not sure why u would decide to live with him if u would constantly need to leave to look after yourself

[Renegade_Sailor]

Leave and stay gone. Find someone new.

[Wise4myage]

Leave again and make it permanent.