I am in high school, and some of my friends are dating, should I start dating too or wait for the right time (focus on my studies and date after)?

[dumdumbishUwU]

I really wanna date, be popular, socialize, but my parents say all of this is useless, and how it will have a bad effect on my career, and future so I shall study instead... They say it's not the right time right now but all my peers are doing it.

[Seinna]

I heard a great advice in the past: don't listen to the advices women give to their friends but to the advices women give to their daughters.

So I'm going to give you the same advise I'll give to my daughter in the future: hold off dating until you're 20. Before that, they guys are simply not worth the time and effort, they just want sex and you'll get used and hurt. I was like you, regretted that unlike my friends I didn't date as a teenager but looking back I'm so happy for it. I think people nowadays treat dating as a hobby and a way to elevate their social status (very short term!) but it has the potential to ruin your reputation and hurt you in ways you can't even imagine. It should only be done when you have a long term goal in mind and can realistically commit to it. Women often can much earlier than men, but how happy you will be in a relationship is strictly linked to the guy you'll be dating. And I know a lot of amazing men in their 20s who admit that they were just sex crazed kids as teenagers and did not respect women because they just didn't have the maturity for it. It's simply the reality of it. Dating as a teenager is only really beneficial to guys and as a girl you will really shortchange yourself. Don't be fooled by teenage "romance" films, they are created by people who don't have your best interest at heart. Can love happen to people at any age? Of course! But don't look for it yet.

[dumdumbishUwU]

woah thanks for that advice, it really is quite eye opening
i shall rather listen to my own mom than random friends who can betray me...
and hmm, okayy ill wait for the right age, gain maturity, and let the guys gain it too.
its better to stay away from drama, getting used, sex, distractions at this age I guess

[Anonymous]

Quite frankly, dating is highly overrated. At some point, we all end up adopting someone else's disgusting health problems on a temporary basis or for life. If I were you, I would thank my lucky stars that I don't have anything gross (or fatal) that can be transferred to your eventual life partner. By the time people get in their 30s and 40s, most carry Hepatis, HPV (a genital warts and cancer causing virus that's never goes away), Herpes, and other nasty shit. Google Image "Sexually transmitted diseases" for reasons to keep yourself to yourself for now.

[Opinion Owner]

correction: If I were you, I would thank my lucky stars that I don't have anything gross (or fatal) that can be transferred to "my" eventual life partner. GAG is'/not the best b/c they don't allow us to edit our comments. :-/

[dumdumbishUwU]

oh i see, thanks for the opinion, ill stay away from these gross diseases..

[Opinion Owner]

I read something a few years ago about this guy who was infected with HIV (and some other stuff) from sleeping around. He had finally found someone he wanted to marry and he was talking about how bad he felt that he would eventually give this stuff to his wife; who was a virgin when he met her. Totally preventable and sad.

[dumdumbishUwU]

yup I get it
that's why ''protection'' is necessary...

[Opinion Owner]

Condoms do not protect against Herpes and HPV. As I said, you should so your research. If you want to have sex anyway, talk to your doctor first to be as safe as you can.

[Opinion Owner]

so = do

[Anonymous]

Right time is when you really just want to do it and feels right. Most of the popular people who dated a lot in my high school ended had trouble getting dates in college and long run. That immature mind doesn't work in college and if college guy knew a girl dated around a lot we would only hook her up with players because they like to switch partners a lot

[dumdumbishUwU]

hmm i think i do get what you are saying
well then lets jus wait for the right time and the right one, till then ill study ;-;

[IsoUser]

To be perfectly honest you should in all honesty respect your parents wishes. Now within reason test the boundaries and become adventurous upto the point of sexual activity, that is Your Own Choice and I wouldn't suggest a guy or girl outside 2 years your own age.

[IsoUser]

You deffinety should focus on your studies.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Do what you feels is best. Do you think dating will get in the way of your studies and grades?

[dumdumbishUwU]

Yes, I kinda do, but I don't know, my best friend has started dating recently, and she seems really distracted, it's her last year and she may not get into a good university which can ruin her career but I think I won't be as serious as her.. my heart wants to date, but my mind wants to study...

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I would focus on studies if I were you.

[dumdumbishUwU]

yes I think I shall too, thaksss

[Anonymous]

If you feel like dating then go for it! Sure also make time for studying, but it is, of course, possible to both have a career and a romantic life. Your parents just want to protect you, but that is too much of a restriction in my opinion.
Also socialising in general is very important, a good network and social skills are essential in many jobs.

[dumdumbishUwU]

yes, you are right, I think I can do both, maybe just not deviate from my studies and not get into a serious relationship rn may work.

thankss for the answer, ill surely socialize more :)

[Opinion Owner]

it is about finding a balance, it can be difficult for some, but I don't think it is easier when getting older.. and getting distracted from higher degree studies or work is maybe even worse than highschool studies :D.. maybe just take a break if it is too much when you have important exams or tests.

[dumdumbishUwU]

yes, ill do that, taking breaks, balancing work and social life, non-serious relationships, etc
thanks for the opinion

[PrettyPriya]

Just because they are doesn't mean you should or need to. Wait until the time is right and focus on your studies. Don't force something just because others are doing it.

[dumdumbishUwU]

heyy, thanks for the answer, I think you are right, i shall build a stable career first than a non stable relationship which would prolly last a few months

[PrettyPriya]

@dumdumbishUwU

That is a wise, wise thing to say at the age of 15. Good for you. 😊

[dumdumbishUwU]

hehe thanks :))

[Henry___Blakes]

I think you should focus on studies. But, You can socialize and get popular by several other ways. Like Participating in all events, celebrations, games.. You're too young for dating and will get a lot of time in future for that.

[dumdumbishUwU]

Hey, thanks for answering, and yes I shall socialize and not just ''date'' cuz well I am just 15, I have my whole life ahead, but yea if a choose the wrong path it can ruin my career which ill regret my whole life... thanks for the opinion, ill keep it in mind and listen to my parents too lol.

[Henry___Blakes]

Very good 🙂

[exitseven]

Your parents have a good point but if you can show that you can have a relationship with somebody and still keep up your grades and participate in your other activities I do not see why you could not go out on dates sometime.

[jahaims]

Your actions shouldn't be dictated based on what others are doing. You are immature enough to have the mentality that you do so you aren't mature enough to date.

[dumdumbishUwU]

um ouch, okay, but like I am 15 , and what others are doing rlly matters rn... and also I don't know what I want sooo...

[jahaims]

Except it doesn't matter and the fact that you think it does again, shows you are immature.

[skyeee_]

your parents are right. you dont have to date just cus others are. would you go for bungee jumping cus your friends did? yeah i thought so.

[dumdumbishUwU]

true true I know, but I ain't just talking about others doing it , maybe some part of me wants to it too, honestly I don't know I am confused..
a part of me wants to have a cute little relationship in high school, but the other wants to study, get into my dream university, earn well.

[skyeee_]

i understand that, however it's best u focus on school for now. relationships at this age won't really last long and the mental pain after breakup isn't worth it either

[dumdumbishUwU]

thankssss for that
and thank you for the advice, it makes sense, thank you ill focus in school instead :)

[skyeee_]

no probs ( :

[ACR130]

Study, high school guys are extremely unfaithful and will try to use you. Guys at that age don't really care to much about the relationship unless it benefits them

[dumdumbishUwU]

hmm I see, I understand
thanks for letting me know, ill surely make sure to stay away from things this sort

[Hunter21]

It's high school live it up date who you want there'll always be work but high school romance maybe not as much

[dumdumbishUwU]

hmm okay, thanks for answering and yea I think taking high school relationships very seriously is dumb, so maybe jus casual-

[Hunter21]

How old are you anyway?

[dumdumbishUwU]

I am 15

[Hunter21]

Yeah you got plenty of time for high school drama go for it

[dumdumbishUwU]

okayy hehe I don't know
thats something new, most people told me to stay away from drama
okay now im confused 😭

[Hunter21]

What's the worst that's gonna happen really a funny story to tell a your kids or spouse a decade from now do it I avoided all that stuff and let me tell you I wish I didn't

[dumdumbishUwU]

I don't know, getting distracted from my studies? scoring badly in exams? lying to my parents and sneaking out? not get in my dream uni? ruin my career? no house no car?

And well yes, I won't avoid everything, maybe not dating YET I guess, though it would be fun telling my kids about my childhood oof I dont know

[Hunter21]

Just date some of the best times you'll have is dating in high school and you don't have to lie or sneak out to do it

[dumdumbishUwU]

yes truee
thanks for the advice
ill make sure to focus and have fun in school :))

[jimmy2]

Dont worry right now stsy focus on school and learning there will be time for that later in life

[Gigi2019]

Ikr. Most people are Disease Museums by the time they hit 50.

[dumdumbishUwU]

hehe okayy thnaks, ill do that, and yes ill wait for the right time :))

[dumdumbishUwU]

@Gigi2019 lol
HIV

[Gigi2019]

The fall out of casual and random sex can be devastating. Did you know that if you only kiss someone with Herpes or HPV; that you can get strains of these viruses that will manifest as cold sores or oral warts? Did you know that if you then perform oral sex on someone; that they can catch genital Herpes or genital warts? Watch out and inform yourself about what's out there before you start swapping bodily fluids with people. Good luck.

[dumdumbishUwU]

@Gigi2019 lmao im scared now
i was like simply talking about casual dating
and you are freaking me out by telling about oral sex diseases 😭😂