What are signs someone is trying to shape their potential partner?

[scooogy]

Like withholding as long as they're not comfortable with one's habits or attitudes.

[1GoldTwins]

If we are going on a date, that's when that shaping happens. That's my main goal when dating someone, to find out if he's a good man.

[dustybiker]

Any kind of control. Starts with small things first to test. Then paranoia asking how long someone is going to be gone, etc.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

There's nothing more narcissistic than thinking you do nothing to manipulate your partner.

[PastorJohn69]

Asking them to change this, change that, wear this... let's start going here
...

[WhitneySnow]

Trying to control them get them to be what the person wants them to be