I started seeing this guy about a month ago. I really like him. We get along and vibe so well. He’s made it clear that he wants to take things slowly and allow things to develop “organically,” which is fine with me (even though I’d rather exclusivity right off the bat because I am very interested). We slept together for the first time 3 weeks in, which I think was a good amount of time to wait. He gives off some mixed signals though. He asked me to go to big bear with him, which is supposed to be this coming weekend. He even told me to make sure that I can take off work. When I asked him about it last week he told me he’d have to check with the planner (his friend) and let me know. It’s now 4 days until the supposed trip and he has not mentioned it. Additionally, he told me two days ago he doesn’t typically go for career oriented women (I’m a lawyer) because he wants someone family oriented (which I am). I’m so confused as to why he’d say that knowing that I’m beginning my career. Also, he said that we’re dating right now, meaning dating around, and he would feel a way if he knew that I was dating around but he’d ultimately be fine with it because that’s the stage we are at.
A guy I used to talk to, who is also an attorney, is expressing interest in me and wants to fly me out to visit him for a weekend. Should I take him up on the offer? Should I decline since I’m interested in the other guy?
To date around or to not date around?
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Opinion
1Opinion
This kinda reminds me of a situation I've been in... the guy wanted to be with someone who is family orientated, which I am, but I'm also starting my career...
Anyway, you're both casually dating one another.
I wouldn't wait for this guy to decide what he wants.
I'd date around, see the other guy (don't even let onto the guy you have interest in)
It doesn't make you bad for exploring other interests.
I'm a true believer that if a guy knows what he wants, he'll pursue it.
Live your best life, have some fun and don't read into it too much.
It might feel a bit iffy, but what does he want? Does he want to be with you? Date around?
Yes, no, maybe?
It might be a shirt amount of time, but a guy who is confusing from the get go, isn't worth waiting for.
Maybe spend time with him further down the line, but I'd be prioritising my own interests.
Upfront ask him about the fate you have arranged. If he is still flakey, 100% I'd be be less available and showing less interest
wants to take things slow, has sex within 3 weeks. geez... that's a terrible amount of time to wait and give it up. he likely found someone else by now. like he said, he's dating around. which means you can do. and honestly, it's best to date people who have the same career path as you. they understand you better. just this time, maybe hold off on the sex. it seems like you want something serious and giving up sex so quickly won't get you there.
Oh the decisions of life.