I have a graduate degree, executive position and have been told I am hot, I am Asian too. Are white men in their 40's not attracted to this?

[Anonymous]

[kylee2437]

So you described surface level qualities but you said nothing about your personality

[Asker]

I did, because I am on a dating app and those are surface level qualities that describe me that can't go any deeper without men wanting to strike conversation with me

[TheSpaceGnome]

Why specifically their 40s? Also it would depend on the degree and career type. Financial success is unimportant, relatability is what matters. So for example if you were an executive/graduate in his dream career path, then he would care.

[Asker]

I personally think degree and career should not be important, but I feel like men get intimidated by that. I am so easy going, but I feel like I dont even want to get promoted b/c guys get intimidated :-(

[TheSpaceGnome]

I don't get intimidated by it.

I don't even understand why anyone would be tbh.

[Asker]

I am happy to know there are some men out there that dont, thank you - this gives me a bit of hope!!

[TheSpaceGnome]

I prefer women who are driven and talented, so I'd only see it as encouraging.

[CALIGVLA]

If I were older (and single), I would be looking for a woman like you.

Asian (let's be real, Asian girls are BEAUTIFUL and we white men know it very well) with good education and a decent job. What's not to like about you?

[Asker]

I hope I find a man like you that believes the same and would appreciate me, thank you! Shoot, I wish you were older and single too ;)

[BeMuse]

What else can you do? The devil is always in the details... You having a graduate degree doesn't say much. What did you study? You having an executive position, again doesn't say much... What kind of company do you work for? What do they do? How much do you work and how stressful is your position. Not that your career and earnings is going to be a big area of interest, but possibly it might be a little interesting. Beauty is subjective, just because some guy once told you that you are hot, doesn't mean all guys will have the same opinion of you. What are your talents, skills, interests, hobbies, etc. What do you like to do in your free time when you're not working?

[BeMuse]

Guys are going to want to hear that other stuff, because they're not employing you to work for them and they're not going to work with you every day at the same company. Your life with men is the time squeezed in between work and sleep. That's the time we care about. That's the time we spend with you.

[Asker]

this is wonderful, thank you for the great insight! I do make over 6 figures and I spend my free time making music and releasing singles... song writing, etc... I have met a few that were intimidated by my 6 figure salary and luxury car, but I dont care about material things really... at least not now... my luxury car I bought years ago... and now I am focused on pursuing the meaning of life, with people who can be on my team and help me live life fully - that's what really matters to me, relationship and doing purposeful work... thank you so much BeMuse!

[bean2k21]

You've described yourself almost as you would to an employer. Your degree and position at work might make for interesting conversation, but they do not necessarily mean that you would be a good romantic partner.

[Asker]

thank you, this gives me insight because a lot of guys tell me I have to tone it down with the level of success I have had with my career... I would give it up for love though... I wish I wouldn't be judged for what I do for work :-///

[UniquelyBasic]

Most men don't care that much about a woman's career.

[Asker]

I get it, but that is what I do and I feel like my career may scare men... but I don't know I can't help it :-///

[UniquelyBasic]

You just need to find someone who's strong mentally to be able to handle a woman who may make more than them. Hopefully you're not one to put a man down because of financial status and if you aren't then finding someone won't be too hard.

[Asker]

thank you :-) I am not at all like that... tbh, I got into my career because I do enjoy it... I am totally a submissive / traditional feminine woman otherwise. It's just these dating apps and how they're structured along with peoples' assumptions can make me look like an aggressive career woman - when I am totally easy going, quiet, non materialistic and sweet otherwise...

[UniquelyBasic]

Do you have pictures on there that show you are fun and easy going?

[Asker]

that's a great point, just pics of me and some friends where I am smiling :-)

[Stevefiveo]

You sound perfect to me.

[Asker]

aww, thank you - too bad you're married :-( but good luck to you, and I wish you well!

[Stevefiveo]

You too. I'm sure you find someone soon.